Jake Slocum: It's weird, right?
@jakewrites.bsky.social
Lumberjack| Farmer| Comedian| Writer - formerly Creepshow: The Game, Dread Central, Syfy Portal, Cracked, others.
MTV's Fear
September 14, 2025 at 1:06 AM
MTV's Fear
Wish the grasshoppers would FUCK OFF but at least they're getting close to turning and in turn being harvested.
Got probably 15 at this stage currently. Psyched.
Got probably 15 at this stage currently. Psyched.
September 13, 2025 at 7:39 PM
Wish the grasshoppers would FUCK OFF but at least they're getting close to turning and in turn being harvested.
Got probably 15 at this stage currently. Psyched.
Got probably 15 at this stage currently. Psyched.
Truly raised by an algorithm, their morals are based on YouTube shorts content guidelines.
September 4, 2025 at 6:29 PM
Truly raised by an algorithm, their morals are based on YouTube shorts content guidelines.
The Age of Heroes never happened in our universe
August 29, 2025 at 4:58 PM
The Age of Heroes never happened in our universe
Jeff Koons said his vacuums behind glass were "kind of eternal virgins".
Art is so fuckin weird.
Art is so fuckin weird.
August 27, 2025 at 7:48 AM
Jeff Koons said his vacuums behind glass were "kind of eternal virgins".
Art is so fuckin weird.
Art is so fuckin weird.
My wife is selling her laptop, so I've been getting it all ready today. I didn't want to throw away her accumulated stickers, so the ones that came off (in one coherent piece) got added to this piece of black construction paper.
I might throw a small frame on it.
I might throw a small frame on it.
August 25, 2025 at 9:41 PM
My wife is selling her laptop, so I've been getting it all ready today. I didn't want to throw away her accumulated stickers, so the ones that came off (in one coherent piece) got added to this piece of black construction paper.
I might throw a small frame on it.
I might throw a small frame on it.
This as a lower back tattoo
August 23, 2025 at 7:18 AM
This as a lower back tattoo
Weapons (2025)
August 9, 2025 at 3:27 PM
Weapons (2025)
Pulled a banger in PTCG Pocket
August 1, 2025 at 3:45 PM
Pulled a banger in PTCG Pocket
Adjusting for inflation, this is the equivalent of 15 wagons in an 1896 traffic accident
July 31, 2025 at 2:25 AM
Adjusting for inflation, this is the equivalent of 15 wagons in an 1896 traffic accident
Tubiposting again to let you know there's an absolutely gorgeous 4K restoration of William Lustig's Vigilante on Tubi.
It looks so good it feels opulent.
It looks so good it feels opulent.
July 14, 2025 at 2:53 AM
Tubiposting again to let you know there's an absolutely gorgeous 4K restoration of William Lustig's Vigilante on Tubi.
It looks so good it feels opulent.
It looks so good it feels opulent.
Tubi is free and has some of the best movies you've never seen.
July 13, 2025 at 1:46 AM
Tubi is free and has some of the best movies you've never seen.
Laughing about the time Batman kicked the Joker's ass real bad and the joker was like, "you might have beaten me Batman but I'll just fuckin kill myself and people will think you did it"
July 7, 2025 at 6:39 PM
Laughing about the time Batman kicked the Joker's ass real bad and the joker was like, "you might have beaten me Batman but I'll just fuckin kill myself and people will think you did it"
Here's a gift reaction image use it for your oblivious friends.
July 5, 2025 at 4:51 AM
Here's a gift reaction image use it for your oblivious friends.
I celebrated Canada Day unintentionally by watching Psi Factor: Chronicles of the Paranormal on Tubi.
It's an unmistakeably Canadian hybrid of X Files, Beyond Belief, and just a smattering of Goosebumps.
Hosted by Dan Akroyd!
It's an unmistakeably Canadian hybrid of X Files, Beyond Belief, and just a smattering of Goosebumps.
Hosted by Dan Akroyd!
July 2, 2025 at 5:58 AM
I celebrated Canada Day unintentionally by watching Psi Factor: Chronicles of the Paranormal on Tubi.
It's an unmistakeably Canadian hybrid of X Files, Beyond Belief, and just a smattering of Goosebumps.
Hosted by Dan Akroyd!
It's an unmistakeably Canadian hybrid of X Files, Beyond Belief, and just a smattering of Goosebumps.
Hosted by Dan Akroyd!
What the fuck is this South of Hell thumbnail on Tubi?
Hey, what the fuck is this South of Hell thumbnail on Tubi?
Hey, what the fuck is this South of Hell thumbnail on Tubi?
June 12, 2025 at 3:57 AM
What the fuck is this South of Hell thumbnail on Tubi?
Hey, what the fuck is this South of Hell thumbnail on Tubi?
Hey, what the fuck is this South of Hell thumbnail on Tubi?
I think I don't understand the format
June 11, 2025 at 6:43 AM
I think I don't understand the format
Don't buy a Switch 2 we achieved peak gaming with Die Hard Arcade pack it up
June 10, 2025 at 6:04 AM
Don't buy a Switch 2 we achieved peak gaming with Die Hard Arcade pack it up
The Rule of Jenny Pen is a very good movie. If you enjoy slow, malicious horror then this is for you.
June 1, 2025 at 5:04 AM
The Rule of Jenny Pen is a very good movie. If you enjoy slow, malicious horror then this is for you.
Big fan of the time the Brawny paper towels guy went corpo
May 18, 2025 at 3:27 AM
Big fan of the time the Brawny paper towels guy went corpo
Conclave (2024)
May 10, 2025 at 8:07 AM
Conclave (2024)