Jacob Carlson
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jacobwcarlson.me
Jacob Carlson
@jacobwcarlson.me
I don't bang I write the good rhymes
Sex and the City characters are tiresome. What I want to know is Which Bewitched Witch Would You Be?

(I'm a Serena, obvs)
November 20, 2025 at 10:38 PM
Too many different things are going into that baby at too big a number
September 23, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Apparently not even Trump invoking Kipling's name will get the media to learn from Kipling. Which, fair, Rudyard Kipling is terrible. But still:
September 22, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Post a movie you like with a terrible rotten tomatoes score

"You didn't get a second opinion about something called a 'brain cloud'?"
September 17, 2025 at 12:58 AM
Protest call-to-action post synchronicity from two of the most interesting fictions authors on the planet (
@lauralippman.bsky.social & @jwomack.bsky.social ). Sometimes bluesky has the juice.
August 25, 2025 at 1:03 AM
I'm trying to decide if I can pull off these brown layers or if I'll look like an archeology professor (derogatory). Child the Youngest says yes, but I have go all-out. I think I agree?
August 22, 2025 at 12:13 AM
I just asked Gemini the same question. It got the states wrong and then delivered this map:
August 8, 2025 at 1:00 AM
They showed a mummy your posts
July 24, 2025 at 9:32 PM
Wait. Did you steal my dog?
June 20, 2025 at 12:02 AM
You’ve been kidnapped. The characters from the last TV show you watched are trying to rescue you. Who is coming to save you?
June 12, 2025 at 5:06 PM
May 1, 2025 at 6:19 PM
At literally the exact same time
April 11, 2025 at 1:58 AM
The boundless insight of artificial intelligence is staggering to behold
April 11, 2025 at 1:49 AM
April 3, 2025 at 4:18 PM
March 14, 2025 at 9:39 PM
He posted this during the Oscars. The man was in the Oscars. Not at the ceremony, he was in the show and presented an award. That’s what this season is doing to lifelong fans.
March 4, 2025 at 3:01 AM
Always
February 9, 2025 at 12:21 AM
Try setting your custom domain up as an IMAP account that's separate from the @mac/iCloud account, then have the @mac account forward to the custom domain. I know this is super un-intuitive by Mac standards, but it works. Here's how I have mine (Zoho instead of @mac, but it will work the same):
February 5, 2025 at 6:41 PM
Wow, Coachella has officially gotten too old for me. I have absolutely no clue who the target audience for this is:
November 21, 2024 at 1:27 AM
I know I'm an insane Egon Schiele stan, but, I mean, come on:
June 15, 2024 at 1:59 AM
Imagine your face is the one on the right
May 27, 2024 at 6:44 AM
This is the most French shit ever and I love it:
May 27, 2024 at 5:49 AM
Your kid posting one of your favorite paintings in their TL just because they also like it feels like a parent level-up.
April 6, 2024 at 9:35 PM
Pharrell just signed this Saami baby to a 5 year brand ambassador deal with LVMH
February 24, 2024 at 1:02 AM
He looks like shit. What mayor had aged this badly this quickly?
January 15, 2024 at 3:27 AM