bad gamers against weed posts
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ihategaw.bsky.social
bad gamers against weed posts
@ihategaw.bsky.social
26 followers 2 following 110 posts
the worst conversations on the internet, curated for your amusement and pre-chewed for easy digestion
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ihategaw.bsky.social
Just fucked this thing
November 7, 2025 at 10:27 PM
ihategaw.bsky.social
Yeah idk why he thought making me forget how to jack off would be like a major inconvenience. I just looked up "masturbation tutorial" and followed along with an instructional video until I got the hang of it. It's only a problem to learn the first time because 13 year olds are stupid and have no privacy, whereas I have a bachelor's degree and an apartment.
November 4, 2025 at 5:23 AM
ihategaw.bsky.social
it just means that something's really good and important. there was this lolcow we used to keep tabs on in here back when that was still allowed, he was a semi-literate guy on twitter who had some kind of fixation on really big sums of money and one of his go-to's was "$100 quadrillion" so we started saying that. a few of us decided to egg him on and linked him to the googology wiki and he got really into it, haven't checked in on him in a while but last i heard he was actually proving theorems and shit
October 13, 2025 at 4:45 AM
ihategaw.bsky.social
well i was going to make a post in here that involved making a joke about that one country that some people are really keen on insisting is a part of china, so i dug around to jog my memory about which one it is (it's taiwan), and after some light reading i did actually formulate an opinion on how that whole situation should be handled, but i ultimately decided not to make the original post so it's kind of a moot point.
September 25, 2025 at 9:52 PM
ihategaw.bsky.social
5. Active washing machine: This one is really fucking dangerous if you don't know what you're doing. Depending on the settings, a washing machine can hit several hundred G's of acceleration; shrinking powers will usually let you *survive* those numbers without permanent damage, but depending on the physics you operate under, it can still be enough to cause you to pass out or be immobilized, at which point you will drown. Suffice to say, I do NOT endorse this unless you are EXTREMELY familiar with both your powers and your washing machine, and ideally with a spotter checking on you regularly. So, why am I even bringing this up? Because masturbating in a washing machine reliably gives me some of the best orgasms I've had in my life, and I'm not alone in that assessment. It's like getting waterboarded in a jet fighter in the middle of the night. You feel like you're going to die and you get so overstimulated that you "cross the border" into a zone of pure pleasure. I think something about the altered geometry does something to your brain that makes it receptive to this sort of thing. There's really nothing like it at 1:1 scale, definitely one of the highlights of shrinkage.
September 17, 2025 at 10:34 PM
ihategaw.bsky.social
This is great timing actually, I was just thinking I wanted to listen to a podcast where two guys with the minimum amount of self control necessary to avoid getting MeToo'ed mutter into their laptop mics at each other about how all art is political and women don't care about looks and whatever other radlib talking points were deposited on their Twitter feeds this week. Let me know when you announce the Patreon so I can join the "Corncobbed by Gritty" tier!
September 15, 2025 at 3:07 AM
ihategaw.bsky.social
My main issue with every person in my friend group, anonymized to maintain plausible deniability but honestly you can probably figure it out if you know the people involved: 1. Has public conversations with their boring ass headmates 2. In every single voice call ever and has a stupid voice that I hate 3. A great artist but only seems to care about writing terrible fanfic 4. Doesn't read theory but acts like they do 5. Unfunny 6. Podcast cohosts are unfunny 7. Doesn't seem to like or even respect any music that's even remotely popular, only ever talks about local acts and bandcamp randos 8. Wants to fuck ugly old men 9. Got super pissed when my girlfriend & I propositioned them for a threeway 10. Unfunny and kind of stupid 11. Has a special interest in The Magnus Archives 12. Thinks their experience as an organizer, which has consisted mostly of helping convince their state government to renew some environmental regulations that have been around since the 90s, entitles them to speak authoritatively on like every fucking political issue ever 13. Kind of stupid 14. Still friends with my ex 15. Still friends with my ex 16. Just gets on my nerves in general
August 24, 2025 at 12:40 PM
ihategaw.bsky.social
Picture this: You're at one of those Little Free Libraries in your neighborhood, looking around in there. They're almost always filled with garbage paperbacks for adults who read at a 9th grade level and self help books for newlyweds, but one time you found a hardcover copy of Uzumaki in it, so you make a point of checking them whenever you walk by. It's only seventy degrees out, but it's really humid and you're a bit overdressed, so you're sweating anywhere that's not directly exposed to the breeze. You're about to move on when you see something neon pink moving in the corner of your eye. You look over and not ten feet away, headed your direction, is a gyaru. You can't really start walking away from the LFL right now without getting in her way, and you don't want to just stare at her, so you pretend to look at the books for a little bit longer until she passes. Once she does, you immediately leave and head in the opposite direction because that's the direction your house is in.
August 3, 2025 at 4:04 PM
ihategaw.bsky.social
I don't know. I think a lot of these jokes rely on the audience 1) picking up on subtle cues you've woven into the character's presentation to denote an archetype they belong to, and 2) finding these archetypes to be as inherently risible and contemptible as you do. Like I don't know what kind of person I'm supposed to assume a sandal-wearing mobile app developer who likes Ritter Sport chocolate is, so I don't automatically laugh when you say he got deported to an "Iberian Pussy Graveyard".
July 27, 2025 at 9:04 PM