Harri Soinila Comedian
@harrisoinila.bsky.social
Stand up comedian coming to you all the way from Finland! Lightly carbonated.
Mel Gibson sure makes a lot of movies about a Jew considering he's Mel Gibson.
October 15, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Mel Gibson sure makes a lot of movies about a Jew considering he's Mel Gibson.
My 2yo has been inventing pre-existing food combos, like pancakes w/ syrup and meat between buns of bread. Basically independently reinventing American cuisine, which makes sense because American food is like tailor made for babies: hyper-palatable, high-caloric, ideal for doubling your bodyweight.
October 10, 2025 at 6:04 PM
My 2yo has been inventing pre-existing food combos, like pancakes w/ syrup and meat between buns of bread. Basically independently reinventing American cuisine, which makes sense because American food is like tailor made for babies: hyper-palatable, high-caloric, ideal for doubling your bodyweight.
When you think you're having a heart attack but it's just a fart it's called gas-induced chest pain and NOT a fart attack. This proves we're living in the dark timeline.
October 8, 2025 at 6:06 PM
When you think you're having a heart attack but it's just a fart it's called gas-induced chest pain and NOT a fart attack. This proves we're living in the dark timeline.
Hello, employer. Charlie Kirk was great. I love him very... Wait, I'm self-employed! Fuck that guy.
September 19, 2025 at 2:34 PM
Hello, employer. Charlie Kirk was great. I love him very... Wait, I'm self-employed! Fuck that guy.
Life is like a box of chocolates. Getting more expensive at an alarming rate and we're not sure there will be any left on earth in 20 years.
August 30, 2025 at 12:22 AM
Life is like a box of chocolates. Getting more expensive at an alarming rate and we're not sure there will be any left on earth in 20 years.
I'm sick and my wife asked me if I've been drinking enough liquids.
That's like all I drink.
That's like all I drink.
August 28, 2025 at 6:55 PM
I'm sick and my wife asked me if I've been drinking enough liquids.
That's like all I drink.
That's like all I drink.
Life Hack: Paint a giant swastika on the hood of your car and people won't even notice it's a Tesla.
May 9, 2025 at 11:22 AM
Life Hack: Paint a giant swastika on the hood of your car and people won't even notice it's a Tesla.
My theory is that #Dutch people are so tall because it's unnatural to live below sea level and it's just nature trying to make sure they can breathe.
May 3, 2025 at 7:23 AM
My theory is that #Dutch people are so tall because it's unnatural to live below sea level and it's just nature trying to make sure they can breathe.
I want to see an action movie that starts with a car chase that destroys a fruit stand, like car chases do… and then follows the fruit vendor on a revenge rampage against every action hero.
April 12, 2025 at 8:00 AM
I want to see an action movie that starts with a car chase that destroys a fruit stand, like car chases do… and then follows the fruit vendor on a revenge rampage against every action hero.
People say a lot of shit about Putin but he's pulled off something I didn't realize was possible. He's got Finnish people rooting for a country with a blue and yellow flag.
April 6, 2025 at 3:52 PM
People say a lot of shit about Putin but he's pulled off something I didn't realize was possible. He's got Finnish people rooting for a country with a blue and yellow flag.
"Those boomers wouldn't have so much financial trouble if they just stopped eating all those damn egg sandwiches!" - Millennials, 2025, probably
March 25, 2025 at 12:22 AM
"Those boomers wouldn't have so much financial trouble if they just stopped eating all those damn egg sandwiches!" - Millennials, 2025, probably
Today I reached peak "Middle Aged Man" by having to get up to pee in the middle of a nap.
March 6, 2025 at 8:17 PM
Today I reached peak "Middle Aged Man" by having to get up to pee in the middle of a nap.
Every time a Gen X says all the new music sounds the same a Gen Z gets its wings.
March 6, 2025 at 4:33 PM
Every time a Gen X says all the new music sounds the same a Gen Z gets its wings.
Noticed something amusing.
Z is the last letter of the alphabet and the last birth year of Gen Z is 2012.
So whoever it is naming the generations, they made the same mistake as the ancient Mayans.
Z is the last letter of the alphabet and the last birth year of Gen Z is 2012.
So whoever it is naming the generations, they made the same mistake as the ancient Mayans.
February 28, 2025 at 5:41 PM
Noticed something amusing.
Z is the last letter of the alphabet and the last birth year of Gen Z is 2012.
So whoever it is naming the generations, they made the same mistake as the ancient Mayans.
Z is the last letter of the alphabet and the last birth year of Gen Z is 2012.
So whoever it is naming the generations, they made the same mistake as the ancient Mayans.
Reposted by Harri Soinila Comedian
Mama Bear: Ok but last time
Papa Bear: Thanks, babe
[she puts on a Goldilocks wig]
Mama Bear:I can't sleep here. It's toooo hard
Papa Bear: Thanks, babe
[she puts on a Goldilocks wig]
Mama Bear:I can't sleep here. It's toooo hard
January 30, 2025 at 6:19 AM
Mama Bear: Ok but last time
Papa Bear: Thanks, babe
[she puts on a Goldilocks wig]
Mama Bear:I can't sleep here. It's toooo hard
Papa Bear: Thanks, babe
[she puts on a Goldilocks wig]
Mama Bear:I can't sleep here. It's toooo hard
I found 50€ yesterday and my inner child said I should buy candy and pizza, but my inner adult intervened and said we should buy candy and pizza and beer.
February 22, 2025 at 2:19 PM
I found 50€ yesterday and my inner child said I should buy candy and pizza, but my inner adult intervened and said we should buy candy and pizza and beer.
Reposted by Harri Soinila Comedian
this is honestly so embarrassing
February 16, 2025 at 7:41 PM
this is honestly so embarrassing
Let's see how this expensive wine pairs with the smell of my 2yo's poop.
February 16, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Let's see how this expensive wine pairs with the smell of my 2yo's poop.
Why did Captain America shoot Peter Parker?
- He misheard his code name as Spy, German.
- He misheard his code name as Spy, German.
February 9, 2025 at 3:27 PM
Why did Captain America shoot Peter Parker?
- He misheard his code name as Spy, German.
- He misheard his code name as Spy, German.
Me: Now we're going home on an airplane!
2yo: The potty is there!
This kid gets it.
It's nice to travel and experience new things and foods, but it's also nice to get back home and poop in your own potty.
2yo: The potty is there!
This kid gets it.
It's nice to travel and experience new things and foods, but it's also nice to get back home and poop in your own potty.
February 6, 2025 at 7:26 AM
Me: Now we're going home on an airplane!
2yo: The potty is there!
This kid gets it.
It's nice to travel and experience new things and foods, but it's also nice to get back home and poop in your own potty.
2yo: The potty is there!
This kid gets it.
It's nice to travel and experience new things and foods, but it's also nice to get back home and poop in your own potty.
The 14yo girl I saw wearing a "Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back" hoodie certainly hasn't seen any pictures of me when I was 14.
February 4, 2025 at 8:42 AM
The 14yo girl I saw wearing a "Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back" hoodie certainly hasn't seen any pictures of me when I was 14.
Vin Diesel is Groot,
February 3, 2025 at 12:06 PM
Vin Diesel is Groot,
Just now at the airport:
2yo *sees a man sort of resembling me in an ad* : "Daddy!"
Wife: "Is it daddy?"
Me: "Yeah, it's me with my Asian family."
W: "Are you doing ads without telling me?"
M: "THAT'S your main concern?"
W: "Yeah, where's the money?"
M: "It's going to the other family!"
2yo *sees a man sort of resembling me in an ad* : "Daddy!"
Wife: "Is it daddy?"
Me: "Yeah, it's me with my Asian family."
W: "Are you doing ads without telling me?"
M: "THAT'S your main concern?"
W: "Yeah, where's the money?"
M: "It's going to the other family!"
February 2, 2025 at 10:34 AM
Just now at the airport:
2yo *sees a man sort of resembling me in an ad* : "Daddy!"
Wife: "Is it daddy?"
Me: "Yeah, it's me with my Asian family."
W: "Are you doing ads without telling me?"
M: "THAT'S your main concern?"
W: "Yeah, where's the money?"
M: "It's going to the other family!"
2yo *sees a man sort of resembling me in an ad* : "Daddy!"
Wife: "Is it daddy?"
Me: "Yeah, it's me with my Asian family."
W: "Are you doing ads without telling me?"
M: "THAT'S your main concern?"
W: "Yeah, where's the money?"
M: "It's going to the other family!"