Gretchen Woods
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gwoods.bsky.social
Gretchen Woods
@gwoods.bsky.social
320 followers 390 following 730 posts
I hate talking about myself, but I’m not a bot, so I guess I should write something here?

LSG 4 ever!
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gwoods.bsky.social
See, you totally could have helped with bird ID in #uganda, because they have snakebirds there, too!
Photo of a bird perched with wings spread on a dead tree trunk in front of a background of greenery. The bird is large and mostly black with a long, skinny brown neck.
November 26, 2025 at 4:11 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Nictitating membranes make everyone look creepier … even shoebills, which I didn’t think was possible.
#uganda
A large grey bird stands in a swamp, its nictitating membrane making its eye look milky and sorta dead.
November 26, 2025 at 2:55 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
From a cul-de-sac 50’ from my driveway in my light-polluted Cleveland neighborhood, with a streetlight directly behind me. Lazy chasers, unite!
An Aurora photo that shows houses at the bottom of the frame and a blend of pink and green lights in the sky.
November 13, 2025 at 4:26 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Thanks to Paws and Claws Animal Encounters in Bremen, Ohio, for making my birthday purr-fect! My experience with Forest and Canyon, their 7-month-old bobcat kittens, was 100x better than I had hoped. Next time I’ll bring you more wool hats to steal, boys!
Photo of a juvenile bobcat lying comfortably in a rock and a piece of wood. The mesh of his enclosure can be seen (out of focus) in the background.
November 9, 2025 at 4:21 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Buy local! You might end up with a Brussels sprout with delusions of grandeur!
Photo of a hand holding a Brussels sprout, which is large enough to completely cover the palm of the hand. Background is a tray of much smaller sprouts getting prepared to blanch.
November 4, 2025 at 10:51 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
Hey @martharichart.bsky.social , I’m so proud of myself for recognizing your style while jet lagged and barely conscious! That’s a good thing, right?
A photo of part of a mural at the Philly airport, by Martha Rich. A white background features simple but colorful cartoon women surrounded by brightly colored speech bubbles.
November 2, 2025 at 10:29 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
Chimp trekking in a downpour in Kibale National Park, #Uganda. Slipped once and ruined my pants for the rest of the trip, nearly lost a boot in the mud, soaked to the skin with rain and sweat, but oh-so-worth it.

#GretchenGoesGorillas
#NatHab
#chimpanzee
Chimpanzee huddled against the rain while perching on a branch. His face is the definition of “unimpressed.” Kibale national park, Uganda
October 29, 2025 at 6:42 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
#Uganda
#GretchenGoesGorillas
#Shoebill

Bucket list sighting!
Photo of a shoebill stork in Mabamba swamp near Entebbe, Uganda. It’s a prehistoric-looking bird, grey with a huge hooked bill and eyes that look almost human. Reeds and swamp grass in the background.
October 23, 2025 at 9:37 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Last year on my birthday I got to see polar bears in Churchill, Manitoba. One sniffed my feet through the floor grating, then popped up to say hello. It was so close I could have booped its nose (if I wanted to lose an arm).
In focus: metal floor grating Out of focus: polar bear snout sniffing my snow boot Up close photo of a polar bear peeking over the back railing of our tundra rover.
October 8, 2025 at 11:39 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
A screen shot of a large American style breakfast with the following text: Uncle Herschel's Favorite Breakfast Two farm fresh eggs* and your choice of breakfast meat and two sides, plus biscuits and gravy. We suggest enjoying with coarse ground grits.
September 30, 2025 at 8:03 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
I am jealous if all the migratory bird action @skwinnicki.bsky.social has been getting recently, so I trundled over to my local migratory bird stopover swamp and found …
Yellowlegs. That’s it. Everything else was a year-rounder. Ever try to snap a wading bird on a phone? Not ideal.
Photo of a very shallow swamp with three black-and-white wading birds in the center of the screen. Birds are tiny and barely recognizable as birds rather than rocks etc. If they hadn’t been mouthy little buggers, Merlin never would have been able to ID them as Greater Yellowlegs.
September 23, 2025 at 10:26 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
Took a brief moment from my walk today to admire this fecund beauty in a nearby park.
Photo of a shaded forest, focused on a large log covered in tan and white half-circles of fungi.
September 7, 2025 at 12:08 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Today’s temporary finish:
Quilting on my kiddo’s homage to Monty Python’s killer rabbit, not sure of kiddo’s age when it was drawn but maybe 7? 8? This was posted on our tv room door for the better part of a year.
An embroidered image in navy blue thread on a cream fabric background. Hand quilting lines in cream thread radiate out from the center of the image. The image says “AHHHHHHH!!!! Warning:” (A barely recognizable image of a rabbit with pointy teeth in a puddle of blood) “Lurks inside” Image is a copy of a drawing made by my kiddo when they were maybe 7 or 8 when they were first introduced to Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
September 7, 2025 at 12:01 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Here she is, the first of my kiddo’s drawings to finally get the quilting done. The embroidery (of tracings of the kid’s artwork over the years) has been done for years, but for some reason I chose to start quilting with the most recent drawing. Anyway, loving the collaboration!
Closeup of hand embroidery and quilting - a pumpkin-headed, root-footed hottie in a bikini top embroidered in dark blue thread on a cream background. Straight lines of hand embroidery in cream thread radiate out from the hottie’s belly button. The whole piece is about 11” square.
September 5, 2025 at 1:47 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Grow it longer! Join my Unexpectedly Wavy Hair Journey!

(My hair was stick straight for decades. Then I hit peri and BOOM waves appeared. Still adjusting.)
Mirror selfie of a woman (purple iPhone blocking her face) with wavy brown hair. It’s a pixie cut that’s grown out, so it’s trending toward mullet-dom in the back.
September 2, 2025 at 5:37 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
So does anyone have a trick for removing chalk marks from under hand quilting? Because after taking this photo I finished the hand quilting on the top half of this block, and those green chalk lines are not washing out. Used soap and water and a small rubber brush.
Closeup of hand embroidery and quilting - a pumpkin-headed hottie in a bikini top embroidered in dark blue thread on a cream background. Partially finished lines of hand embroidery in cream thread radiate out from the hottie’s belly button. Whole thing is enclosed in a green embroidery hoop.
September 2, 2025 at 1:52 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
See, it used to be that Arby’s made me think of you. Now, you’ve got competition in my head.
16 17 18 19 20 21| 22 0337 Case 5:24-cv-00625-JSM-PRL Document 100 Q Exhibit 30 -- 2000 A She was upset. She was jealous. Q Exhibit 30 is your response to her; can you read that out loud to me? "Hey, Marjorie. Remember when you destroyed your family so you could have sex with a Zangief cosplayer? Tell me again how you and the Arby's in Filed 07/31/25 Page 152 of 228 PagelD your pants" -- yeah. That was widely reported. I mean, that's why she got divorced. And that divorce records -- Q No. No. Read the tweet. A "Are representatives of the GOP. You couldn't even run your own family. Don't tell me how to run my free speech." Okay. So when you -- A But you're not showing the -- the screenshot. It's like intentionally blurred out. 1 don't know why you blurred it out. But it showed a document where somebody who she had an affair with showed text messages of her having an affair, and it was well-documented. It was in text messages. And it's the reason why she ended up getting divorced from her husband, Perry, who I know. 'Cause when -- at the time, during my campaign, they were married, and they came to my event. And it's well-known. And she's even admitted to it that they got divorced because of her marital infidelity. So - Right. Can you explain to me what il 10 111 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21| 22 0338 2 10 11| 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21| 22 0339 A But I don't understand why you blurred it out. It's blurred out. Q Can you explain -- MR. KLAYMAN: Objection. Relevancy. BY MS. BOLGER: Q Can you explain to me what it means to say to her that "the Arby's in her pants"? A Well, Arby's -- MR. KLAYMAN: Objection. Relevancy. BY MS. BOLGER: Answer the question. A Arby's sells roast beef. talking Rout Che roysel her pants.why you were Well, it's just a -- an expression. • What is the expression trying to convey' A It conveys the reason why she got a divorc by her own admission. Because she had roast beef in her pants? A Yeah. • She'd put roast beef in her pants; that' vhat vou… Case 5:24-cv-00625-JSM-PRL Document 100 saying she put Arby's in her pants? 2001 A I'm saying she literally - it's so ridiculous. I'm saying she literally put Arby's in her pants. Yes. MR. KLAYMAN: Objection. Relevancy. BY MS. BOLGER: Q You're not making a slur about her? A No. Q You're literally saying she put an Arby's 10 sandwich in her pants; is that right? 11| A Yes. That's correct. That's correct. 12 Q Why are you laughing? 13| A Because I just think it's so funny. 14 Q What is your basis for saying she put Arby's 15| in her pants? 16 17| A I just think it's so funny. I just think it's so funny. 18 Q What is your basis for saying she put Arby's 19 in her pants? 201 A She carries roast beef in her pockets. 21| Q What is your basis for saying she puts roast 22 beef in her pockets and in her pants? 0340 MR. KLAYMAN: Objection. Relevancy. THE WITNESS: Because I know she likes 10 11| 12 13 14 15| 16 17 18 19| 20 2 Harassment. roast beef. BY MS. BOLGER: Q So what is your basis for saying she had 7 Arby's in her pants? A Because I know she likes to eat at Arby's. Q And she likes to put it in her pants; you know that? A Yeah. Q She puts Arby's in her pants? A Yeah. She does. Q Okay. If I ask Marjorie Taylor Greene, she would tell you that she puts Arby's in her pants? A I -- it's my best belief that she would tell you that. Yes. Q Okay. Are you making a derogatory comment about her sex life by talking about Arby's in her pants? 21| 22 0341 A No. I'm talking about Arby's, the sandwiches. I'm talking about Arby's. I would -- I'm a very direct person. If I was making a derogatory comment, I would have said it. I just think it's so funny because I -- I feel like you would understand it if you actually hadn't blurred the photo, but it's blurred. Q We didn't blur a photo. There may be have been some kind of copy editor, but we'll get you a better copy of it, if that's right. Filed 07/31/25 Page 153 of 228 PagelD
August 13, 2025 at 2:48 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Me to my teen, with whom I frequently joke about these airplane-snack-pizza-things:
“Look! I got a menopausal one!”
A weird bread object in a cardboard tray. It’s oblong with the long edges folded toward the center, and for once it has NO tomato sauce leaking out anywhere.
August 8, 2025 at 12:46 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
In 2004 I wrote a short feature for the Plain Dealer newspaper about coyote research in the Metroparks. Since then, I have been on the lookout for a live coyote, but I only saw roadkill.

UNTIL TODAY!
Photo taken through a car window. Foreground is mostly grass, background is mostly sky, and in the middle there’s some overturned earth and a construction vehicle. Oh, and there’s a barely visible coyote, its grey fur blending in nicely with the grass. Photo of a coyote facing to the viewer’s left, intent on something in the grass that surrounds it. The image is pixelated because I just zoomed in on the other photo and my phone is good, but that coyote was small!
July 27, 2025 at 2:21 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
Low water on the Danube = alternate docking location = alternate shore excursions = my husband and I decided to do our own thing. He’s hiking to something he found on Google Maps while I sit in the shade and sew.
Screen shot of a text thread, sent between 2 people who have very different ideas of how to spend a free day in the middle of nowhere, Bulgaria. Jason: 45 flights of steps, horse shit, wild dogs, flies, and trash dumped in the pit. Do not recommend. There are sunflower feed field if you go far enough though. Me: I am so happy in my breezy shady location on deck. Jason: Google maps can kiss my ass
July 3, 2025 at 6:43 AM
gwoods.bsky.social
If you think I’m going to enjoy the amenities of the Munich Lufthansa lounge without eating a pretzel, you’ve lost your everloving mind.
A cheese-covered pretzel on a white porcelain plate. The cheese has been melted and cooled, and the whole thing doesn’t look very appetizing at all.
June 29, 2025 at 12:39 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
It’s been a while since I’ve flown over Germany, and I forgot how pastoral it looks from the air. Lookit all the little fields! And the wee towns!
Photo out of an airplane window, showing a landscape of patchwork fields, tiny towns, and forests.
June 29, 2025 at 12:26 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
Got up early to get my walk done before the heat hit. Mostly succeeded, but after 6 miles, it does indeed feel like 98 freaking degrees.
Screen shot of a weather app that reports the temperature as 86 degrees and sunny, with a “feels like” temp of 98 degrees. Not shown: my reddened, sweaty face and sincere wish for d**th.
June 23, 2025 at 2:10 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
Last night’s #brainweaselbuster was a destash of 15 skeins of embroidery cotton and one dollar store wreath form. Biggest “god’s eye” I’ve ever made, and I am super pleased with the result.
Photo of a craft project on a quilted grey background. The project is a wire wreath form that has embroidery floss wrapped around it in the style of a “god’s eye.” The 15 shades of blue floss form concentric rings of color, like rings on a tree.
June 4, 2025 at 4:56 PM
gwoods.bsky.social
New addition to the charity quilts: just finished a quilt top using many, many spare blocks and pieces.

#brainweaselbuster
A quilt top pieced from 20+ different brightly colored solid and print fabrics, with some boring grey fabric added to tie things together. There is no design or order - things just got sewn down where they fit.
May 27, 2025 at 4:20 AM