Gul Dukat PR
@guldukatpr.bsky.social
Just an old-school Gul telling Bajoran Workers and American Citizens what to do.
(A Parody Account For Our Times)
(A Parody Account For Our Times)
As long as you do not revolt, you will all get 80,000 credit rebate checks.
March 1, 2025 at 1:11 AM
As long as you do not revolt, you will all get 80,000 credit rebate checks.
Whoever put up those (FAKE!) feet videos will be dealt with!
As will anyone laughing at them!
As will anyone laughing at them!
February 24, 2025 at 7:43 PM
Whoever put up those (FAKE!) feet videos will be dealt with!
As will anyone laughing at them!
As will anyone laughing at them!
If anyone went on Damar’s official DODGY website and downloaded classified information, you are hereby ordered to delete it now.
February 16, 2025 at 1:06 AM
If anyone went on Damar’s official DODGY website and downloaded classified information, you are hereby ordered to delete it now.
Damar is looking into the matter, but Domino’s business license will likely be revoked for violating the new Planetary Office of Humor’s policies on promoting social unrest.
February 8, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Damar is looking into the matter, but Domino’s business license will likely be revoked for violating the new Planetary Office of Humor’s policies on promoting social unrest.
Second only to Dukat of course!
Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
I don’t understand why Trump looks so grumpy all the time. He’s the second-most-powerful man in the world.
February 6, 2025 at 5:27 PM
Second only to Dukat of course!
Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
Just a reminder that there will be heavy reprisals for targeting engineers assisting the new government. The word “collaborator” will also be filtered to promote order and stability.
February 5, 2025 at 1:26 AM
Just a reminder that there will be heavy reprisals for targeting engineers assisting the new government. The word “collaborator” will also be filtered to promote order and stability.
Please stop reporting Damar for immigration violations. You are wasting valuable time for the immigration enforcement teams.
February 4, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Please stop reporting Damar for immigration violations. You are wasting valuable time for the immigration enforcement teams.
The Bajorans and the Federation were so obsessed with little owls that they hampered the ability of industry to extract much needed minerals. Today I am remedying that tedious oversight and dismissing 1,100 pointless functionaries from the now defunct Bajoran Provisional Government.
February 1, 2025 at 7:50 PM
The Bajorans and the Federation were so obsessed with little owls that they hampered the ability of industry to extract much needed minerals. Today I am remedying that tedious oversight and dismissing 1,100 pointless functionaries from the now defunct Bajoran Provisional Government.
The recent, unfortunate, shuttlecraft incident was actually the fault of BEI hires. Bajorans, Earthers, and Independents are to blame, not the current government.
January 30, 2025 at 11:57 PM
The recent, unfortunate, shuttlecraft incident was actually the fault of BEI hires. Bajorans, Earthers, and Independents are to blame, not the current government.
Thanks in no small part to my effective leadership, Independent Cardassian Enforcement agents will now have beheadings daily instead of only on Wednesdays.
January 30, 2025 at 2:03 AM
Thanks in no small part to my effective leadership, Independent Cardassian Enforcement agents will now have beheadings daily instead of only on Wednesdays.
Damar is reading each and every post you make and will report back to me on any seditious activities or opinions that might reflect poorly on certain esteemed Guls.
January 29, 2025 at 10:57 PM
Damar is reading each and every post you make and will report back to me on any seditious activities or opinions that might reflect poorly on certain esteemed Guls.
In order to prevent any BEI forces from getting funds and to help Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again, all checks previously sent by Damar are null and void.
January 29, 2025 at 1:50 AM
In order to prevent any BEI forces from getting funds and to help Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again, all checks previously sent by Damar are null and void.
For too long, hard working Cardassians have been passed over for promotions and leadership roles by so-called “BEI hires.” No more! All former BEI hires are immediately fired and their jobs will be offered to real Cardassians.
Together, we will Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
Together, we will Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
January 28, 2025 at 12:57 PM
For too long, hard working Cardassians have been passed over for promotions and leadership roles by so-called “BEI hires.” No more! All former BEI hires are immediately fired and their jobs will be offered to real Cardassians.
Together, we will Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
Together, we will Make the Alpha quadrant Great Again!
The Federation and its dwindling list of allies can save their tears. Those were just some unusually short trouble makers.
January 28, 2025 at 12:48 PM
The Federation and its dwindling list of allies can save their tears. Those were just some unusually short trouble makers.
I categorically deny trying to feed my next in line to a mob of angry Pah-Wraiths! My new second in command will tell you the same thing.
January 27, 2025 at 7:10 PM
I categorically deny trying to feed my next in line to a mob of angry Pah-Wraiths! My new second in command will tell you the same thing.
Due to current tensions, you will only be able to procure half of your usual coffee allotment. You can thank the rebels for your inconvenience.
January 27, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Due to current tensions, you will only be able to procure half of your usual coffee allotment. You can thank the rebels for your inconvenience.
Ah, the hypocrisy of the universe never ceases to amaze me!
I, Gul Dukat, know a thing or two about greatness. I have crushed worker revolts and benefitted from *ahem* volunteer labor. And I can tell you, Elon Musk is a kindred spirit. Stop picking on your President.
I, Gul Dukat, know a thing or two about greatness. I have crushed worker revolts and benefitted from *ahem* volunteer labor. And I can tell you, Elon Musk is a kindred spirit. Stop picking on your President.
January 27, 2025 at 1:19 PM
Ah, the hypocrisy of the universe never ceases to amaze me!
I, Gul Dukat, know a thing or two about greatness. I have crushed worker revolts and benefitted from *ahem* volunteer labor. And I can tell you, Elon Musk is a kindred spirit. Stop picking on your President.
I, Gul Dukat, know a thing or two about greatness. I have crushed worker revolts and benefitted from *ahem* volunteer labor. And I can tell you, Elon Musk is a kindred spirit. Stop picking on your President.
That is unusually good pay for Terok Nor!
January 27, 2025 at 1:12 PM
That is unusually good pay for Terok Nor!
No one who claims to speak for the Prophets should be allowed to insult a Gul in public!
January 27, 2025 at 1:09 PM
No one who claims to speak for the Prophets should be allowed to insult a Gul in public!