Cottoneyedjoeschmo
@goofenthal.bsky.social
I have become cringe; destroyer of jokes
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
You are ABSOLUTELY NOT going to regret listening to this bird:
A male rock ptarmigan (Lagopus muta) in winter plumage.
Ptarmigan is from Gaelic 'tarmachan' meaning "croaker". The p- was added when people mistakenly assumed it was a Greek word.
A bird forever warning people: "A werewolf!" (just in case of werewolves).
Ptarmigan is from Gaelic 'tarmachan' meaning "croaker". The p- was added when people mistakenly assumed it was a Greek word.
A bird forever warning people: "A werewolf!" (just in case of werewolves).
December 6, 2025 at 5:10 PM
You are ABSOLUTELY NOT going to regret listening to this bird:
Me watching Apothecary Diaries: "Get 'em, Columbo!"
December 4, 2025 at 2:02 AM
Me watching Apothecary Diaries: "Get 'em, Columbo!"
Got fired for not being a happy peasant.
December 2, 2025 at 6:22 AM
Got fired for not being a happy peasant.
*leaning over to my wife in Chainsaw Man Reze Arc movie* "This is exactly what it feels like to get broken up with by a woman. Shark men and everything."
December 1, 2025 at 3:37 PM
*leaning over to my wife in Chainsaw Man Reze Arc movie* "This is exactly what it feels like to get broken up with by a woman. Shark men and everything."
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
Review Brah almost said Thousand Island Stare, it's not just a fat guy thing, there's finally proof.
The One Item I'm Actually Scared To Eat...
YouTube video by TheReportOfTheWeek
youtu.be
August 31, 2025 at 4:46 AM
Review Brah almost said Thousand Island Stare, it's not just a fat guy thing, there's finally proof.
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
Had an idea that a Sci-fi movie from Angel Studios would be pretty funny because they wouldn't even know how to do that. Got on Google and found out they're proving me correct. Movie sounds fucking boring.
THE SHIFT–a Faith-Based Sci Fi Thriller Inspired by Job from Executive Producer Dallas Jenkins and Producer Ken Carpenter–in Final Round of Crowdfunding | Angel Studios
To be Distributed by Angel Studios, THE SHIFT movie will feature THE CHOSEN Stars Liz Tabish, Paras Patel, and Jordan Walker Ross, as well as LOST Star Jorge Garcia–a Modern-Day Sci-Fi Thriller Inspir...
www.angel.com
July 24, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Had an idea that a Sci-fi movie from Angel Studios would be pretty funny because they wouldn't even know how to do that. Got on Google and found out they're proving me correct. Movie sounds fucking boring.
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
this video is gonna make me throw up
June 20, 2025 at 2:18 AM
this video is gonna make me throw up
At that perfect drink/high level that Death Stranding 2's menu music is everything I need. Where was this shit in 1993?
July 1, 2025 at 11:35 PM
At that perfect drink/high level that Death Stranding 2's menu music is everything I need. Where was this shit in 1993?
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
quote this with your favorite dimension, the one you'll return to first when you acquire the crystal. For me it would be Hot dog dimension (not the food it's just a dimension shaped like a tube. they mostly eat chicken wings there)
May 20, 2025 at 2:40 AM
quote this with your favorite dimension, the one you'll return to first when you acquire the crystal. For me it would be Hot dog dimension (not the food it's just a dimension shaped like a tube. they mostly eat chicken wings there)
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
final fantasy 14 didn't mark me for the story, gameplay or community
this, this left a mark
this, this left a mark
January 29, 2025 at 3:26 PM
final fantasy 14 didn't mark me for the story, gameplay or community
this, this left a mark
this, this left a mark
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
Every moment of Project Eden's intro is a marvel of animation (and art direction)
March 13, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Every moment of Project Eden's intro is a marvel of animation (and art direction)
Reposted by Cottoneyedjoeschmo
President Trump the HBO Max series Scavengers Reign was cancelled due to wokeness. Please do a pitch for Scavengers Reign season 2 in front of the White House
March 11, 2025 at 11:12 PM
President Trump the HBO Max series Scavengers Reign was cancelled due to wokeness. Please do a pitch for Scavengers Reign season 2 in front of the White House
So the whole movie is just "Willem Defoe moved to Florida?"
March 12, 2025 at 12:04 AM
So the whole movie is just "Willem Defoe moved to Florida?"
"bro let's go they're having a standing normal competition at steak n shake"
Bro:
Bro:
March 11, 2025 at 5:32 PM
"bro let's go they're having a standing normal competition at steak n shake"
Bro:
Bro:
Oh shit I just thought this was Mark Prosch doing a bit. This guy is real????
We are about to do WMDs with Canada and say those huge tire stores they have up there are drug superlabs
Kevin Hassett suggests Canadian authorities are covering up major fentanyl operations: "I can tell you that in the situation room I've seen photographs of fentanyl labs in Canada that the law enforcement folks were leaving alone. Canada's got a big drug problem."
March 9, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Oh shit I just thought this was Mark Prosch doing a bit. This guy is real????
After a long day of doing rails of meth off a nerdy white gal with 3 boyfriends and maining teemo, our subject finds warmth and security in the lovesac. Another day complete, he survives to do it all again tomorrow. /Attenboroughvoice
March 8, 2025 at 2:11 PM
After a long day of doing rails of meth off a nerdy white gal with 3 boyfriends and maining teemo, our subject finds warmth and security in the lovesac. Another day complete, he survives to do it all again tomorrow. /Attenboroughvoice
Seeing as I'm the only one in my several friends group that remembers Wesley Willis existed it's time I start my yearly awareness campaign and terrorize my friends with his songs again. rest in peace, man.
March 6, 2025 at 8:08 AM
Seeing as I'm the only one in my several friends group that remembers Wesley Willis existed it's time I start my yearly awareness campaign and terrorize my friends with his songs again. rest in peace, man.
*cursed to put on i whupped Batman's ass when not sober*
March 6, 2025 at 7:50 AM
*cursed to put on i whupped Batman's ass when not sober*
Y'all think Linn Manuel Miranda would have made the slaves of the forefathers white if he had the balls to put them into the musical?
February 24, 2025 at 3:50 PM
Y'all think Linn Manuel Miranda would have made the slaves of the forefathers white if he had the balls to put them into the musical?