ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
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I don’t flirt, I just say stupid shit until someone gets a boner about it
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
her: you sure are eating a lot..

me: gotta bulk up. I applied for a job as a heavy machinery operator

her: so?

me: they didn't say how heavy you need to be so I assume it's a competition kind of deal
November 12, 2025 at 4:37 AM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
I possessed a demon once. He called an exorcist in under two minutes.
November 12, 2025 at 4:37 AM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
Touch grass you said

It will be fun you said

Sure I said what’s the worst that could happen

(severe allergic reaction and $200 fine)
November 7, 2025 at 5:16 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
everyone hates leafblowers, but the leaves love them
November 12, 2025 at 1:20 AM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
sometimes i’m a huge cunt as a treat
November 11, 2025 at 10:48 PM
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anyone who reposts this skeet gets a piece of my body to display on their mantle AFTER I die
November 11, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
BREAKING: Elon Musk Begs His Mom to Fight Joyce Carol Oates
November 11, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
ever since i was a small child i knew i wanted to eat twenty-five to forty grams of fiber a day
November 11, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
i love the smell of ficklenuts in the morning!
I grabbed coffee with @porcelainsiren.bsky.social this morning and can confirm that she's just as wonderful in person 🥰
November 11, 2025 at 10:01 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
revenge is a dish best served after I’ve licked everything on the plate
November 11, 2025 at 3:15 PM
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Babies are so weak. You don't hear me crying every time I crap my pants
November 11, 2025 at 1:21 AM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
14 hours of uninterrupted shitposting could fix me

oh nvm already tried that
May 29, 2025 at 2:57 AM
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i would like to go big and go home
November 11, 2025 at 6:28 PM
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there’s something about being called a degenerate that just makes you feel young again
June 5, 2025 at 1:14 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
Ever heard of a John Bobbitt snowstorm?

4 inches on the ground
November 11, 2025 at 9:46 PM
I grabbed coffee with @porcelainsiren.bsky.social this morning and can confirm that she's just as wonderful in person 🥰
November 11, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
would you still love me if i took you to the gum wall?
November 10, 2025 at 5:15 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
soup as old as time
broth as old as rhyme
beauty and the bisque
November 11, 2025 at 8:17 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
Yesterday I was at the dog park with a plastic baggie in my hand walking around saying, "Do a poopy. I want to see you do a poopy."

They told me not to come back without a dog.
November 11, 2025 at 8:06 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
My gasts are completely flabbered.
November 11, 2025 at 5:50 PM
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Gonna be a slutty pilgrim for Thanksgiving this year.
November 9, 2025 at 4:52 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
what if we made out like bandits
November 11, 2025 at 5:37 AM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
Why is it called a lie detector machine and not a defibillator?
November 10, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
If you say you’re going to do something, do it.
my dad always said he was gonna get drunk then by god he would
November 11, 2025 at 4:28 AM
Reposted by ficklenuts likes a good stuffing 🦃
this skeet may be monitored or recorded for quality and training purposes
November 11, 2025 at 5:29 AM