Yes. There is no middle ground.

So well described! Just observing myself I have come to these exact conclusions...

I wonder how much of this is pure prioritization, like deciding what is the next most important thing to do, and gathering enough "evidence" of the thing's value for our own brain to justify action?

And the flipside is that if something huge happens, like an emergency of any kind, I am on top of it instantly... and with laser focus.

Yes! I have described it to people as my personal rollercoaster... You know, even on rollercoasters you have parts where you just gather momentum and move towards The Thing. So even if it looks like I'm basically just sitting on my hands, I need that, and then I can do a week's job in an evening 🎢.

Thx, first reply! ❤️

Oh yes, finding that right job is definitely key. I struggled too long before accepting my must-haves... need meaningful purpose & domain that's inherently interesting. Also, enough autonomy. And decent company culture & flexible working environment.

I can't control my focus. Focus always follows interests, and I don't get to choose them. I tried studying the wrong thing and ended up physically falling asleep again and again trying to do the work. But, since I'm also stubborn, it took me decades of troubles to accept it and plan accordingly.

Another contradiction is that I am a perfectionist in many things. For example, I love when things are neat and organized, and I can even get hyperfocused organizing something. But keeping things organized in the long term? Ha 😂. I have a few lifehacks that help, but... def not a strength.

Shielding myself from others' emotions (or maybe more like shedding them after I mirror them) has taken a lot of practice. But because I'm a creature of contradiction, I'm "of course" also endlessly interested in people's inner workings, group dynamics etc.

I actually consider my people skills a strength. I find it easy to "get" other people, their feelings and motivations, but at the same time social interaction takes a huge amount of energy, especially when in a bigger group. I am an empath of sorts, can't stop picking up others' emotions.