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dustinkcouch.bsky.social
dustin Couch
@dustinkcouch.bsky.social
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dustinkcouch.bsky.social
does anyone have advice for being more assertive in situations like this?
Text exchange: Sender: Hey this is Jake from doordash I'm on my way Receiver: I didn't order anything from doordash Sender: I didn't say you did? Receiver: you're right i'm sorry Sender: No worries be there in 5 Sender: *picture of front door* Let me in
September 28, 2025 at 4:29 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
Here's 4 images from my new video go watch The Web Watchers
A screenshot of a reddit comment exchange: ms-paint-sonic: I got a ticket for going 20 miles under the speed limit yesterday :( spyro-64: LMFAO you are SUCH an unhinged chaos gremlin and I am so here for it ms-paint-sonic: please don't say shit like that to me A Facebook post from Oakview Watch that says: ROADSIDE REBECCA SPOTTED WALKING ALONGSIDE RED LEAF ST. BE CAREFUL IF YOU ARE DRIVING TONIGHT Comments: Jake Jenkins: My big cousin almost hit her once. He is single and christian Meryl Russel: How big is he Meryl Russel: How big is your cousin A reddit comment exchange: depressedgokux200: you've been stood up DOZENS of times? StraightCoded: yeah it's called putting yourself out there and getting rejected before you even get the chance to prove that you're worth being loved (cry laugh emoji) ms-paint-sonic: do you need someone to talk to StraightCoded: yes A discord screenshot exchange: lindsayissleepy: Ok but you have to move here first lindsayissleepy: It's getting embarassing telling people that my best friend is from Canada lunargghost: i'm from california lindsayissleepy: that is the same thing
September 27, 2025 at 1:42 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
i made a new screenshot story here's the first minute

the other minutes are on youtube:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfjT...
September 26, 2025 at 1:47 AM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
oh hey Bluesky finally added a Group DM
(An image with the bluesky logo uptop) YOU asked and WE listened. We've added a GROUP DM! we just need you to follow a few rules: Rule 1: Be nice! Rule 2: No Cursing! Rule 3: Participate! Ready? LET'S GO!! (let's go is a blue link) Bluesky Group Chat grudge holder: lol i missed group chats me: so this is just a giant group chat? caturday blues: yeah ms_paint_sonic: ya Dave: (sends a post from Dentist From Beneath that says "You look like someone I could see myself divorcing in a few years. - me, flirting with you") Dave: boost this grudge holder: LMAO (Gray text in middle says "You tried to leave.") Bluesky Moderator: Sorry, We haven't added that feature yet! Me: The feature to LEAVE? Me: The feature to LEAVE? ms_paint_sonic: what the fuck (Gray text in middle says "ms_paint_sonic has been taken beneath") Bluesky Moderator: Rule 2: No Cursing caturday blues: oh my god?? dave: (sends a post from Dentist From Beneath that says "ADVICE NEEDED: what kind of wine pairs best with a 2nd glass of wine?") dave: boost this grudge holder: now is not the time dave grudge holder: that is funny as f*ck though (Gray text in middle says "questpsx has been taken beneath") blurry hamster: that guy didn't even say anything! Bluesky Moderator: Rule 3: Participate caturday blues: @moderator.bsky.social LET US OUT (Gray text in middle says "caturday blues has been slowly dragged beneath, screaming for their life") Bluesky Moderator: Rule 1: Be Nice blurry hamster: that was so violent for no reason?? :cry emoji: me: i have an idea me: we need to get the moderator to break a rule blurry hamster: that's a stupid idea (grey text in middle says "blurry hamster has been taken beneath") me: hey @moderator.bsky.social me: (sends a post that says "The series finale of America being the worst episode yet wasn't on my 2025 beingo card. Oh wait. Yes it was") me: isn't this post funny Blueksy Moderator: Of Course! me: (sends a post that says "It isn't technically day drinking if you're still drunk from the night before. In this essay I will") me: how about this one bluesky moderator: Well everyone has their own sense of humor! me: (sends a post that says "An assault rifle that only shoots blanks should be called a Jk-47! I'll see myself out") me: how about this Bluesky Moderator: fuck Bluesky Moderator: that post sucks so bad (grey text in middle says "Bluesky Moderator has been taken beneath") me: f**k i thought that would work dave: I told you to boost it dave: did i not? (grey text in middle says "He is rising from beneath") The Dentist From Beneath account starts typing
July 23, 2025 at 6:45 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
POV you're looking through the reddit comments of the most gut-wrenching tragic news story you've ever read
a ctrl+F search of the tone tag "/s" on reddit. There are 3,453 results
July 7, 2025 at 1:10 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
who you gonna call

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vOG...
June 22, 2025 at 1:28 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
the weirdest thing that happened to me 56 months ago was when when i got sent this counterfeit coupon
(A text message exchange. The number up top is blurred out.) Sender: (Image of a Pizza Hut coupon) Pizza time! Show this coupon to the cashier while checking out at your neighborhood Pizza Hut for a FREE 1 Topping Large Pizza. At participating location only! Receiver: idk if this is the number to text but i just showed this coupon to the cashier and they said they didn't recognize it. sender: at participating location only! Receiver: location? As in just one Pizza Hut? Sender: Yep! More of the text exchange: Sender: Yep! Receiver: Which location? Sender: (Sends an address, but it's blurred out) Receiver: Are you sure you sent me the right address? Sender: Yep! Receiver: then what the fuck is this Sender: pizza hut (text from a different cut off number) Sender: (sends a coupon) Burger time! Show this coupon to the cashier at your neighborhood McDonalds for a free quarter pounder! Yum! At participating location only. Receiver: which location Sender: (sends address, but it's blurred out) Receiver: that's the same address that other number sent me to. Sender: no it isn't Receiver: i'm not going Sender: please sender: please Receiver: no Sender: please (Text from Mom) mom: What time are you and your brother planning on coming by tonight? love you Receiver: idk i haven't talked to him but I'll probably get there around 6 or so. do you need me to pick anything up on the way? love you too mom: No, I'm just running to pick up dinner real quick before y'all get here. I got a great deal on some pizzas! Receiver: wait what deal Receiver: mom? mom: (sends coupon) Pizza time! Show this coupon to
June 20, 2025 at 6:26 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
alt text for screenshot 3
Third Screenshot of Bluesky. quest psx: is there a worse place on the internet than twitter right now (screenshot of Twitter) Danny1983: blood is on your hands @Sony @BugGirlFilm (quote tweet of CNN article) Girl in Madisonville, Oklahoma found dead with no eyes or pulse. A resident of Madisonville, Oklahoma identified as Kayl...(text cuts off here) Danny1983: (reply to tweet) [Proverbs 18:10] "The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous man runs in (text cuts off here) (the replies, favs and retweets look like they're melting onto the next post. they spell out "Kayla" in red) ONA Comic: (4 panel webcomic that looks melty and corrupted) panel 1: (blue guy holding 2 babies) hey i adopted some babies panel 2 (green guy looks fucked up) they made bugboy woke panel 3: (blue guy frowns) panel 4: (bible verses fill the panel) [Revelation 20:13-14] 18 The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged according to what they 14 Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death!! Bluesky: Since we are currently unable to combat the high amount of twitter/X screenshots, we have to ask that you delete Bluesky off of your phone for your safety. - Delete the Bluesky app - Break your phone - Find a safe place to hide zeemon: (reply to bluesky announcement): is it her (screenshot of Snopes) Claim: Dying websites are being haunted by someone named "Kayla" Status: Unverified Example: [Collected via e-mail, November 2009] DELETE YOUR MYSPACE ACCOUNT Why don't you use AOL, Livejournal or Neopets anymore? Is It because of the strange feeling you get when browsing a dying website? Those website aren't just dying. They're being haunted by her. If you're still using MySpace, you've likely seen chainletters about a girl named "Kayla." Do you think those are really your friends posting those chainletters? Wake up. Your friends are dead. Do NOT spread these chainletters or repeat any phrases that they contain. Delete your MySpace. Stay away from dying websites. Send this to 5 people and repeat "kayla is so pretty" 10x or she (text cuts off here) grudge holder: (reply) wait then what phrase are we not supposed to repeat (post is red and melting) gunman: they made bug boy woke (screenshot of twitter) Here's why it matter that they made Bus Bay Woke: My wife has two son's that I aided in producing. They are roughly 9 and 14 and they (text cuts off here)
October 18, 2024 at 9:23 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
weird night on bluesky
Screenshot Of Bluesky on the Discover tab: Wholesome Facts: wait i just learned that to keep from drifting apart otters will hold hands and plan date nights Bluesky: You might have noticed the app glitching out a little bit today. We think it may be related to screenshots of Twitter/X so please refrain from posting those for now. gunman: wow wonder why everyones leaving twitter big mystery (Screenshot of Bluecheck user on Twitter) On my own: They don't give a fuck about you. They only care about their agenda and their woke cult. They don't just want your money. They want your blood. (quote tweet from Pop Crave: Sony reveals title of Bug Boy reboot: Bug Girl) (Poster of Bug Girl with Tagline: Little Bug. Big Heart.) (screenshot of twitter ends here) (The replies, favs and shares under the screenshot all read 000) Nostalgia ZONE: am i the only one who remembers myspace (screenshot of myspace) xxBritneyxx (~waffle mafia =]) Subject: Body: PLEASE OPEN: YOUR CRUSH WILL ASK YOU OUT IF... hello my name is kayla and i was killed by a drunk driver who stabbed me to death. the cops wouldn't even let my parents see my body because my corpse looked so crazy. send this to 5 people and repeat the phrase "kayla is so pretty" 10 times or i will be in your room tonight. PS i have no eyes or a face either && i'm dripping with blood [Proverbs 3:15-16] "Trust in the LORD with all (screenshot of myspace cuts off here) ms paint sonic: (reply to myspace screenshot) is this real Screenshot of Bluesky: ms paint sonic: kayla is so pretty! :) blue thumb: just got evicted (upside down smiley emoji) sorry to ask this but please send what you can Wholesome Facts: (reply) here ya go (picture of a cat) did you know cats love their humans SO much? You got this (fist bump emoji) blue thumb: (reply) i don't have a cat. quest psx: i think it can pull through (screenshot of CNN Article) X (Formerly Twitter) has lost 99.99% of its traffic in last 5 days X Continues Its Pilgrimage Into Oblivion ONA Comic: (a 4 panel comic) panel 1: (blue guy holding 2 coffees) hey i made us some coffee panel 2: (green guy holding 2 coffees) but i made us coffee too panel 3: (blue guy still holding coffee) guess thats why i love ya panel 4: (green guy still holding coffee) aw title in corner: Our Neurodivergent Asses wood plant: i should delete twitter (screenshot of twitter) Saved By HIM @rockoXVII They made Bug Boy woke. Burn it all the fuck down. (quote tweet of official sony account) Sony: Hey it's me Bug Girl! I'm a little bug with a big heart! (the replies, favs and retweets look like they're melting onto the next post. they spell out "Kayla") Wholesome Facts: did you know dogs made bugboy woke Alt text for 3rd screenshot is in the replies because it exceeds the character limit Fourth screenshot of Bluesky: The posts are all red and melty and the replies, favs and shares all spell out "I am in your room" There is a face in the backround as well. (bottom of tweet from ms paint sonic:) and that man's name was Albert Einstein. Share with 10 people or he will rise from the grave. gunman: ❤❤❤GOD LOVES YOU❤❤❤ SHARE WITH 7 PEOPLE OR YOU WILL GO TO HELL Wholesome Facts: did you know god has no eyes or even a face && shes dripping with blood ONA Comic: "I do not give Facebook consent to use my pictures, information or posts." paste this into your status or Facebook will sell your information! (four panel webcomic is all fucked up with text layed over it that says: HELLO MY NAME IS KAYLA AND I WAS STABBED TO DEATH I HAVE NO EYES I HAVE NO FACE I AM IN YOUR BEDROOM) wood plant: YOUR CRUSH WILL ASK YOU OUT if you share this with 8 PEOPLE. IF YOU DO NOT SHARE THIS THEY WILL HUNT YOU
October 18, 2024 at 9:17 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
friendly reminder
image of a stick figure labeled "You" saying "Joe Rogan is short" shooting a gun at stick figure labeled "Joe Rogan" who is holding up a shield, which ricochets the bullet over the head of a small stick figure named "your short friend" saying "missed me"
August 5, 2024 at 11:02 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
Alt text for images 2 and 3
Screenshot of twitter TL: im ready (spongebob avi): (quote tweet of Bluey thread from screenshot 1) lol...i could say something...but ok bikini bottoms (spongebob avi): (reply to im ready) bluey fans need to learn how to shut the fuck up lmao ms sonic: gonna listen to taylor swift for the first time tonight! any tips?? court: (reply to ms sonic) NO BUT I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU _ dare2dos: (quote tweet of picture of lake from screenshot 1) spongebob got him xxdarkzeldaxx: (reply to dare2dos) wait is that what that picture is supposed to mean bc it scared me (cry emoji) dare2dos: (reply to xxdarkzeldaxx) idk im just postin _ ~ jakey ~: the way having adhd is such a superpower like what do you mean i can drink some paint and be fine (picture of Jimmy Neutron looking confused) (Community Note: You cannot drink some paint and be fine) Last 3 posts on image 2: Josh (spongebob avi): good (Quote Tweet of CNN article that says: Small town in shambles after local Bluey fan sets record for Most Missing Boy Ever "This is unironically SO scary" says Sheriff Tap (18) "What if I'm next?") dry sponge (spongebob avi): (reply to Josh) this had to be us Imao honestly i can feel something major shifting within the sb fandom ____ grudge holder: i don't think that's where those are supposed to go (quote tweet of Dexerto article saying: X (Formerly Twitter) found dumping servers into a lake in Clareton, Oklahoma) Screenshot of TL: servsup: milkshakes lowkey taste better microwaved _ ms sonic: lets goooo (picture of a Taylor Swift Album called Sounds Of Halloween. A 60 minute song called Evil Ghoul Laugh + Thunder Sounds is playing) court: (reply to ms sonic) you're in for the night of your life. seriously _ ranger danger: ok i looked up the lake that twitter's been dumping their servers into and ??? (picture of a wikipedia article that reads: In 2004, locals claimed to see Matthew Towers, the local dentist, roaming around the town at night on stilts and crawling into the second story windows of residents' houses. [71] On June 7th, 2004 at 11:24 PM, Towers was chased by an angry mob through the town before falling into the lake and drowning, still wearing his stilts. His body was never recovered.[72] To this day, the children of Clareton claim to be visited by a "Very, very tall dentist" in their dreams if they forget to brush their teeth before bed. [73]) ~jAkey~: guess i shook the hivemind with this one Imfao (quote tweet of the "adhd is a superpower" post from screenshot 2) BOAT: (reply to jakey) dw no one's mad at you lol :) they just think you are so stupid ~jAkey~: (reply to BOAT) You trumpet that you are not mad, yet you revert to utilizing such childish insults to belittle my intelligence? Perhaps a look in the mirror may be of use to you? Ah, but I digress to ponder further as it may...wound the pride that is clearly so important to you. ~jAkey~: (reply to self) I am at the dentist's. (picture of lake from earlier, except now an unidentifiable object is rising from it)
June 7, 2024 at 6:09 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
cool day over at twitter
Screenshot of a thread on Twitter from someone named "Trey - Birthday in 2 days!" with a Bluey avi. Every post has larger ratio of quote tweets and replies than likes. The thread has 7 posts. Post 1: im sorry but if you think spongebob is funny you have an annoying sense of humor Post 2: "omg a hit tweet" lol didn't expect what was easily my dumbest tweet to go off but ok Post 3: guess i hit a nerve (shrug emoji) spongebob dick riders out in full force tonight ig Post 4: ok y'all are getting boring so i'm muting this thread now have fun talking amongst yourselves (peace sign emoji) Post 5: btw this is why nobody gives a fuck about the sb fandom anymore. toxic bullshit like this is why i left in the first place Post 6: also hey hi hello its me again just want to say if you're sending me death threats because you don't understand satire: my little cousin knows how to doxx. do not fuck with me Post 7: I am at the dentist's. (picture of a lake is attached) Alt text for Images 2 and 3 will be in the replies because they exceed the character limit. Alt text for Images 2 and 3 will be in the replies because they exceed the character limit. Screenshot of Twitter TL: servsup: (quote tweet of "milkshakes lowkey taste better microwaved") BAHAHA of course the incels found my post (cry laugh emoji) enjoy your brainfreeze i guess (shrug emoji + crylaugh emoji) ranger danger: (reply to servsup) you need to leave your house immediately. set your milkshake down gently so you don't burn yourself and leave right now. you might be in danger servsup: (reply to ranger danger) shut the fuck up (two crylaugh emojis) servsup: (reply to self) I am at the dentist's. (picture of lake from screenshot 1 and 3, but now a giant hand is rising out of it) __ pics of vegeta: PSA: STOP FEEDING HIM. BE NICE TO EACH OTHER. DO NOT AGITATE ANY FANBASES. KEEP YOUR TAKES COLD AND YOUR INTERACTIONS PLEASANT OR YOU WILL SUMMON THE VERY, VERY TALL DENTIST. DO NOT DO THAT ____ ms sonic: i liked some of her songs but i don't really think taylor swift's music is for me personally :/ (this post has a huge ratio of 807M quote tweets)
June 7, 2024 at 6:02 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
i think twitter might be dying
A Screenshot of a headline from CNN on Twitter/X that reads: "Almost one million people went missing last night" along with a screenshot of a creepy forest. The replies are from a bunch of blue check accounts and read: Darren Rogerrs: Good Stuff Fighter Jet: Two puzzled Emojis Danny1983: Joe Biden Saved By HIM: What a crazy world we live in Stoic van: Almost a million people gone missing wow they must be doing a magicians disapperance (cry laugh emoji) Dave: eyes looking left emoji Matt: Hello On my own...: Ii need assistance. i am at 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ rockoXVI: What a crazy world we live in Screenshot of X timeline: blue thumb: does anyone think this app has gotten strange lately its over (reply): what do you mean Pizza Huts: hey it's pizza huts (pizza emoji) reply with where you are right now picture of dogs: hollywood is going downhill i swear... (quote tweet of Discussing Film: Disney considering making another Marvel movie or perhaps a Star Wars. For more updates meet me at 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ) Growers Groceries: We're throwing a christmas party and YOU'RE INVITED SHOUT your address in the replies if you want in on this (christmas tree emoji) (attached to the tweet is an image of a christmas invitation that reads: "HO HO HO!!! Ready for some holiday fun? Games! Prizes! A Dr. Pepper. We'll even pick you up in a LIMO! 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ") samara (reply): what in the kidnapping scam is this post super paint sonic (reply): 3522 SOUTH LANE SLOCUM, IL 60056 UNIT 68 Screenshot of X: grudge holder: i just looked up how many blue checks there are and lmao (Image: "At least 891,693 users currently suscribe to X premium according to the data") (quoted tweet from NBC: "Experts estimate a total of 891,963 people have been reported missing in the last 24 hours") it's over (reply): but they're all still posting so much idk they seem fine grudge holder (reply): do they? Blue check account (reply): What a crazy world we live in bee meeter: you should not give your address out to an account that has existed for one day in my opinion (quote tweet from super paint sonic giving out his address to Grower's Groceries, who joined in December 2023) super paint sonic: i was worried about that too so i checked dw it's legit lol (image of DM between sps and growers groceries) Growing Games: we're giving out FREE Playstation 5s today. come on down to our store at 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ (image of a 3DS on ground) Luigi 64 (reply): pick that up Screenshot of X timeline: grudge holder: those shady ads that keep coming up all belong to a company called Growing Graveyard. guess what else belongs to them now (image that says: "Growing Graveyard is an American provider of funeral services as well as cemetery property. It's founder, The Long Legged Mortician has stated that the goal of the company was to "Grow the biggest graveyard of all time" He had himself buried alive in the Growing Graves Cemetery to "Add to the numbers" Headquarters: 207 N Oakwood St, Madisonville AZ Founder: The Long Legged Mortician (???-2023) Subsidiaries: Growers Groceries, Growing Games, Pizza Huts, X") quest psx (reply): have we been sold again super paint sonic: the limo has arrived (sunglasses emoji) (image of hearse) bear and bird (reply): That is a hearse (heart emoji)
December 3, 2023 at 3:54 AM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
it's that time of year again
Screenshot of a Tweet from @Twitter on 9/22/2022 and its replies. Twitter: Ready for halloween? (ghost emoji) (jack o lantern emoji) (skull emoji) So are we! That's why we're excited to introduce you to @TheBigWitch You'll be seeing a lot of her throughout the spooky season! But beware, she's out to give you a scare! Replies: The Big Witch: BOO! I'm The Big Witch! I'm flying around on my broomstick causing trouble! (broom emoji) (witch emoji) save game (response to The Big Witch): this seems like it's going to get old fast The Big Witch (response to save game): I'll place you in my cauldrom! I'm The Big- (The screenshot cuts off here) (The Big Witch's username and handle are both Orange) (Screenshot of Twitter Timeline) water tunic: the way virgos freeze up when you ask to see their phone... The Big Witch (reply): I eat frog legs for breakfast and toadwarts for lunch! water tunic (reply): quiet _ real pokemon: my life has gotten so much better ever since i chose peace and love over hate and negativity The Big Witch (reply): I choose dark magic and trickery! The Big Witch strikes again! real pokemon (reply): shut the fuck up _ bark simpson: not really comfortable with the fact that the big witch account is just a walking stereotype of witches The Big Witch (reply): You'll make a fine ingredient in my stew! Oh how I love black cats and pointy hats! bark simpson (reply): see like all of this is just a lot _ pictures of good dogs: (mirror selfie of a fit person) if you don't fuck with me i don't fuck with you. simple as that The Big Witch (reply): Oooo I'm melting I'm melting! big goku (reply): ma'am (Screenshot of Twitter Timeline) sonic avi: i hate how i say "i'm fine" when i'm actually so sad all the time. i can't keep lying to everyone The Big Witch (reply): I'll put a nasty spell on you! I'm The Big Witch! sonic avi (reply): hey i say a lot of things i don't mean when i'm upset and i'm in a very bad place right now but i want you to know i mean this with all my heart: nobody here likes you. nobody wants you around. i hope the person running this account dies (orange text) TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH airplanehater (reply): oh shit _ McDonalds: come try our new halloween fries! only $1.99 TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH pumpkin (reply): (image of an empty parking lot where a mcdonalds should be) PUT IT BACK _ trash: EVERYONE REPORT THE BIG WITCH SHES-TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH _ beck: how come everyone's tweets say "taken by the big witch" like are y'all in a relationship with her or something TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH _ Will: (image of big witch outside of window) WHY WOULD GOD MAKE THIS (Screenshot of Tweet from @twitter) Twitter: Hey everyone, We apologize for the inconveniences caused by The Big Witch. We did not realize she could take people and we will be deactivating the account. In the meantime, we will be launching an investigation to find out what happened to the (giant green text) TAKEN BY THE BIGGER WITCH
October 31, 2023 at 11:59 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
i hate using new apps
A green login screen for an App called "Deffun" At the top is the word "Deffun" which is above a generic looking app symbol (purple and blue circle) Below the symbol is a tagline that says "Talk to the world" Below the tagline are Sign Up and Login buttons Below the buttons is small text that says Terms of Service - Privacy Policy - Cookie Policy - Ads Info - More - ©Deffun 2004 An app that looks like a green Twitter/Threads/Bsky. Next to the reply, share and heart buttons is an odd cylindrical symbol new sonic: what does that fourth thing do f9 for mage: man (attached to the post is a headline that says "Twitter headquarters on fire for 18 days in a row") ben: what's your favorite memory of twitter jon (replying to ben): never used it star mario got (replying to ben): one time i posted a picture of my face and a garfield parody account replied that he no longer believed in God new sonic: what does that fourth thing do (the cylindrical symbol is red and rising on new sonic's post) 1st gen pokemon: deffun was created before twitter?? (attached to the post is the first image, zoomed in on the 2004) new sonic: i hate starting over on a new app. its like the first day at a new job where you don't know anyone or what that fourth thing does. what the fuck does it do (the odd symbol is rising to the point of touching the text) another screenshot of posts on Deffun new sonic: WHAT DOES IT DO (the odd symbol is now growing out of the screen and looping back down, touching new sonic's avi) 1st gen pokemon: oh shit (attached to the post is an image of the wikipedia article for Deffun. It says "Deffun was created in 2004 by Dr. Nick Staler in an effort to perform an online ritual to summon an entity known as The Lengthy Surgeon Users who signed up for Deffun unknowingly agreed to give up a portion of their souls to aid in the summoning. They were also entered into a lottery, in which the winner would be used as a vessel for The Lengthy Surgeon The website was shut down after Staler was unable to hit the required goal of 100,000 users" severed bot: wait the site needed 100,000 users? how many does it have now? 1st gen pokemon: 987,835,245 severed bot: ok new sonic has an unreadable post as it is completely covered in the odd symbol. More posts on Deffun Fox News: BREAKING: BIG OLE SURGEON CRAWLS OUT OF DEFFUN USER'S MOUTH (attached to the post is a headline that says "FIND A RELIGION AND PRAY TO A GOD BECAUSE IT IS NOT LOOKING GREAT") jon: OH GOD IT CONSUMES. OH HOW IT CONSUMES. THIS CANNOT POSSIBLY GET ANY WORSE NBC News: Elon Musk offers to buy Deffun for $45 Billion (attached to the post is a headline that says "Elon Musk: 'I'm gonna charge for vowels')
September 19, 2023 at 9:10 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
Does the photo viewer work for any of you when reading the longer screenshots? For me it cuts off at the bottom and dims when I scroll up. I guess you could save the images before looking at them as a work around or give me sys admin privileges for a sec and let me take a swing at it (no experience)
September 18, 2023 at 2:16 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
i hate hotel wifi
A sign that says "DO NOT USE HOTEL WI-FI (For the password, contact Rebecca At The Front Desk)" At the top of the image is a notification that says "Successfully connected - Rebecca At The Front Desk Is Now Crawling Toward You" with a clickable option to "Pray To God" 8 Tweets below the notification. one piece avi: "NOOOO WHY WOULD YOU CONNECT TO THE WIFI" incredibly deceased: "lol aw man it's always a bummer to watch someone learn that Crawlin Rebecca is after them" gravey: "me when another guest ignores the sign" Attached to the tweet is a gif of spongebob watching tv and eating popcorn didn't die just missing: "BRO LEAVE" sonic's dead friend (response to didn't die just missing): "i don't think this advice has worked for anyone ever" link drowned: "what was your last memory before crawlin rebecca got you" incredibly deceased: "praying for god to send me to hell so i would be safe and far away from rebecca surf bot: "calling the police to tell them i love them" sonic's dead friend: "screamin" 5 Reddit Posts Post 1 (Best Buy Ad): You will not escape Rebecca. PS5s are only $599 at Best Buy! Post 2: 5 Things To Do If Crawlin Rebecca Is After You (Next to the post is a Thumbnail of video that says "#3 I DON'T KNOW") Post 3: Jimmy Fallon on Crawlin Rebecca: "Please don't hurt me." Post 4: Am I in Hell? (in the NoStupidQuestions subreddit) Post 5: Dustin, I know you're reading this. Find the router and destroy it. It's the only way to stop her. Below the post is a notification that says "Rebecca At The Front Desk is no longer crawling toward you!" 3 tweets and a notification. long gone devin: "RIP" beck: "WHY WOULD HE DESTROY THE ROUTER" A large notification is in the middle of the picture that says "REBECCA AT THE FRONT DESK IS NOW SPRINTING TOWARD YOU" with a picture of a blurry figure sprinting toward the camera and a clickable option that says "GOD IS HIDING" sonic's dead friend: "if you support Crawlin Rebecca x Sprintin Rebecca ships, block me and then set your house aflame"
September 17, 2023 at 10:13 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
screenshot time baby
Screenshot of 4 tweets on twitter. The first is of the FBI's official twitter account tweeting "READ AND SHARE" along with an image that says "WARNING: DO NOT LOOK AT THE INTERNET BETWEEN 12:01 AM AND 1:01 AM TONIGHT -Unplug every monitor in your household - Turn off your phone and leave it face down in an unoccupied room - Lock your doors" A user named "sonic daddy (single era)" responds with a tweet that says "wait what happens when I look at the internet" The FBI responds by saying "You will know suffering intimately, Sonic Daddy" sonic daddy responds "hm (thinking emoji) i'll think about it" Screenshot of 8 tweets on twitter, all of which are red. Sad Kirby: "ew make it blue again" Joe Biden: "red :)" i love the dang beach: "why is nobody talking about the fact that twitter is red now" marios face (Response to i love the dang beach): "it isn't just twitter" Attached to the tweet are two images showing that other websites are red as well. One image is of Reddit and one is of Youtube. The posts on Reddit are all encouraging the reader to unlock their doors. The Youtube image shows a video titled "HOW TO UNLOCK YOUR DOORS (HOT)" daniel: raise your hand if you're looking at the internet even though the government said not to (raised hand emoji) sonic daddy (response to daniel): (A hand splayed emoji along with a picture of Spongebob raising his hand) McDonalds: Please unlock your doors sonic daddy: my ex gf who ghosted me the entire internet (handshake emoji) ✓red at 12:01 AM 5 more red tweets nemesis of trains (Quote tweeting a tweet from the Wendy's account that says "Unlock your doors."): "no (thumbs up emoji)" ps1 megaman: "red internets got netflix fucked up" Attached to the tweet is an image of a sitcom on netflix that looks very red. The subtitle on the screen says "[Audience Chants] UNLOCK YOUR DOORS UNLOCK YOUR DOORS UNLOCK YOUR DOORS" daniel: first the internet goes red and now someone is banging on all my doors like i don't have work in the morning (eye roll emoji) great little day i'm having here CNN: "BREAKING: UNLOCK YOUR DOORS RIGHT NOW" Attached to the tweet is an image of someone aggressively jerking on a door handle. sonic daddy: "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT" Attached to the tweet is a red image of a small creature standing outside of a front door. Twitter is blue again. There are 4 tweets. melting laptop (Quote tweeting sonic daddy's handshake tweet from earlier, with the text now all replaced with the words "help me"): "looks like twitter had a normal one last night" sara (Quote tweeting the Joe Biden tweet from earlier, but it now just says "help"): "?" FBI: "READ AND SHARE" Attached to the tweet is an image that says "WARNING: DO NOT POST OR EXPOSE ANYONE TO ANY SCREENSHOTS OR VIDEOS TAKEN OF THE INTERNET LAST NIGHT BETWEEN 12:01 AM AND 1:01 AM" dustin Couch: "screenshot time baby" Attached to the tweet are the four screenshots that you're looking at.
September 16, 2023 at 10:59 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
the internet sucks now
August 1, 2023 at 4:19 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
i love new twitter
July 1, 2023 at 7:13 PM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
movie marketing has gotten strange
June 11, 2023 at 1:43 AM
dustinkcouch.bsky.social
did anyone else get this e-mail from twitter last week?
June 1, 2023 at 1:02 AM