Darrin Bird
@darrinbird.bsky.social
Who would win in a fight? Landman or Roofman (I’ve seen neither)
October 20, 2025 at 3:43 AM
Who would win in a fight? Landman or Roofman (I’ve seen neither)
One thing I learned in the new John Candy doc (which is great) is that he didn’t have a left kneecap his whole adult life like whaaaat
October 17, 2025 at 3:06 AM
One thing I learned in the new John Candy doc (which is great) is that he didn’t have a left kneecap his whole adult life like whaaaat
Going to show up to an ICE protest and blast nothing but Wesley Willis songs. Rock on, Chicago.
October 8, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Going to show up to an ICE protest and blast nothing but Wesley Willis songs. Rock on, Chicago.
Reposted by Darrin Bird
I get that the news cycle is packed right now, but I just heard from a colleague at the Smithsonian that this is fully a GIANT SQUID BEING EATEN BY A SPERM WHALE and it’s possibly the first ever confirmed video according to a friend at NOAA
10 YEAR OLD ME IS LOSING HER MIND (a thread 🧵)
10 YEAR OLD ME IS LOSING HER MIND (a thread 🧵)
September 24, 2025 at 8:30 PM
I get that the news cycle is packed right now, but I just heard from a colleague at the Smithsonian that this is fully a GIANT SQUID BEING EATEN BY A SPERM WHALE and it’s possibly the first ever confirmed video according to a friend at NOAA
10 YEAR OLD ME IS LOSING HER MIND (a thread 🧵)
10 YEAR OLD ME IS LOSING HER MIND (a thread 🧵)
Whenever I see a Trumper with a dog in their profile pic I think, “You don’t deserve that.”
September 23, 2025 at 12:22 AM
Whenever I see a Trumper with a dog in their profile pic I think, “You don’t deserve that.”
Every day I feel I’m closer to becoming Saw Gerrera.
September 20, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Every day I feel I’m closer to becoming Saw Gerrera.
Sure is embarrassing what people will do for a bloated 79-year-old pedophile.
September 18, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Sure is embarrassing what people will do for a bloated 79-year-old pedophile.
It’s not getting as much attention but please remember Jerry Seinfeld also sucks.
September 11, 2025 at 12:46 AM
It’s not getting as much attention but please remember Jerry Seinfeld also sucks.
Thinking of heading down into the sewers to join Bane.
September 10, 2025 at 2:32 AM
Thinking of heading down into the sewers to join Bane.
Reposted by Darrin Bird
Whenever a pundit writes in elaborate terms about about the "Dictator Playbook," all I can think is, "Oh, you mean the petty psychological characteristics of an abusive father?"
how much of the "classic moves of authoritarian dictators" are just the natural instincts of violent narcissists. Like just the m.o. of a specific type of criminal not done because they're copying someone else or know all the right moves.
August 14, 2025 at 8:53 PM
Whenever a pundit writes in elaborate terms about about the "Dictator Playbook," all I can think is, "Oh, you mean the petty psychological characteristics of an abusive father?"
Jesus even his penmanship is the same as my dad’s.
(My dad was the same person as Trump. The similarities are so eerie I’m beginning to think they were part of some horrible cloning experiment.)
(My dad was the same person as Trump. The similarities are so eerie I’m beginning to think they were part of some horrible cloning experiment.)
BREAKING via NYT: The Times found another admiring note Donald Trump wrote to Jeffrey Epstein.
“To Jeff — You are the greatest!” reads an inscription in a copy of Mr. Trump’s book “Trump: The Art of the Comeback” that belonged to Mr. Epstein. (link in reply)
“To Jeff — You are the greatest!” reads an inscription in a copy of Mr. Trump’s book “Trump: The Art of the Comeback” that belonged to Mr. Epstein. (link in reply)
July 26, 2025 at 4:52 AM
Jesus even his penmanship is the same as my dad’s.
(My dad was the same person as Trump. The similarities are so eerie I’m beginning to think they were part of some horrible cloning experiment.)
(My dad was the same person as Trump. The similarities are so eerie I’m beginning to think they were part of some horrible cloning experiment.)
Reposted by Darrin Bird
"The president has chronic vascular disease that will probably kill him. Also, we have proof he's a pedophile. His administration is still politically powerful enough to cancel a comedian's TV show." --today's cumulative news
July 18, 2025 at 12:23 AM
"The president has chronic vascular disease that will probably kill him. Also, we have proof he's a pedophile. His administration is still politically powerful enough to cancel a comedian's TV show." --today's cumulative news
Why be an ICE agent when you can work Ross loss prevention.
Or literally anything else.
Or literally anything else.
July 15, 2025 at 2:49 AM
Why be an ICE agent when you can work Ross loss prevention.
Or literally anything else.
Or literally anything else.
Welp, time to build a working lightsaber.
July 4, 2025 at 3:44 AM
Welp, time to build a working lightsaber.
Reposted by Darrin Bird
Imagining Huell Howser stopping an ICE raid by just walking up and extending his hand and saying, "Well hello boys, what brings y'all out to historic Boyle Heights today?"
June 30, 2025 at 2:37 AM
Imagining Huell Howser stopping an ICE raid by just walking up and extending his hand and saying, "Well hello boys, what brings y'all out to historic Boyle Heights today?"
My takeaway from the NYT 100 films thing is I need to rewatch Michael Clayton.
June 28, 2025 at 12:56 AM
My takeaway from the NYT 100 films thing is I need to rewatch Michael Clayton.
Reposted by Darrin Bird
Nathan Fielder is on CNN prefacing all his comments with “as a pilot…”
May 29, 2025 at 4:24 PM
Nathan Fielder is on CNN prefacing all his comments with “as a pilot…”
Actually there’s already been an American Pope.
May 9, 2025 at 6:28 AM
Actually there’s already been an American Pope.
Andor is great so far, but it could use some Bor Gullet.
April 24, 2025 at 6:44 AM
Andor is great so far, but it could use some Bor Gullet.
Reposted by Darrin Bird
there is simply no amount of child death that will move RFK to change his mind because he is a predatory narcissist who cares less about health than the gratification of his own ego
Astonishing RFK Jr interview with NBC. At 23.30 he claims pharmaceuticals are the 3rd leading cause of death in the US [wtf]. He discloses the name & medical history of the 2nd child to die of measles, implies she wasn't healthy & argues about her cause of death. @gorskon.bsky.social
Key takeaways from RFK Jr.'s interview on measles vaccine, food dyes, weight loss drugs and more
Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. spoke with CBS News in an exclusive interview. Here are some highlights.
www.cbsnews.com
April 13, 2025 at 11:27 AM
there is simply no amount of child death that will move RFK to change his mind because he is a predatory narcissist who cares less about health than the gratification of his own ego
Forty years ago Columbia University kicked out the Ghostbusters. They were never on the right side of history!
April 6, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Forty years ago Columbia University kicked out the Ghostbusters. They were never on the right side of history!
I’ll bet a dollar they thought “The Atlantic” was a government organization.
March 26, 2025 at 5:32 AM
I’ll bet a dollar they thought “The Atlantic” was a government organization.
*John Hammond voice* I really hate this man.
February 28, 2025 at 9:24 PM
*John Hammond voice* I really hate this man.
Hello, I would like to hire RoboCop to shoot Elon in the dick. Does anyone have his number?
February 22, 2025 at 5:08 PM
Hello, I would like to hire RoboCop to shoot Elon in the dick. Does anyone have his number?