clarabellum
@clarabellum.bsky.social
god help me if I choose a lane.
“You don’t even let YOURSELF see your secret hole!”
August 6, 2025 at 4:01 AM
“You don’t even let YOURSELF see your secret hole!”
the fun thing here is that I have two friends named Dan and this could be about either of them
“dan came thundering in like an elephant, holding a leaf of romaine like a gun”
June 20, 2025 at 4:07 PM
the fun thing here is that I have two friends named Dan and this could be about either of them
“you can make a spooky dungeon all you want, but we’re gonna dance our way through it”
June 20, 2025 at 2:43 AM
“you can make a spooky dungeon all you want, but we’re gonna dance our way through it”
“Costi’s feeling invigorated by the prospect of murdering these vampires”
June 20, 2025 at 1:55 AM
“Costi’s feeling invigorated by the prospect of murdering these vampires”
Got so mad at dungeons and dragons that I started calling my dm “Mr math man”
April 8, 2025 at 3:06 AM
Got so mad at dungeons and dragons that I started calling my dm “Mr math man”
tired: jet lagged
wired: disoriented in time (adderall later than usual and an espresso martini)
wired: disoriented in time (adderall later than usual and an espresso martini)
March 28, 2025 at 3:41 AM
tired: jet lagged
wired: disoriented in time (adderall later than usual and an espresso martini)
wired: disoriented in time (adderall later than usual and an espresso martini)
I was already insanely dysregulated and then my noise canceling headphones died so you can find me lying down on Connecticut avenue
March 17, 2025 at 6:03 PM
I was already insanely dysregulated and then my noise canceling headphones died so you can find me lying down on Connecticut avenue
“And I have more but that’s all I can fit in my armpit” this is an iconic #loveisblind reunion
March 10, 2025 at 3:55 AM
“And I have more but that’s all I can fit in my armpit” this is an iconic #loveisblind reunion
make America great again: go back to losing organs
Amy Paris was hired to help modernize the nation's donor organ network, which ensures critically-ill people get the organs they need.
She was also let go.
"We had alignment from Democrats and Republicans on the Hill, we had funding, and they were hiring more of us.”
She was also let go.
"We had alignment from Democrats and Republicans on the Hill, we had funding, and they were hiring more of us.”
February 23, 2025 at 7:11 PM
make America great again: go back to losing organs
I am begging @godaddy.com to stop swindling the boomer women in my life out of 500 dollars for a domain name
February 18, 2025 at 4:35 PM
I am begging @godaddy.com to stop swindling the boomer women in my life out of 500 dollars for a domain name
Reposted by clarabellum
I do think it’s funny when the car companies are like “we may be divided but now more than ever, I think we can all agree: car ❤️”
February 10, 2025 at 2:45 AM
I do think it’s funny when the car companies are like “we may be divided but now more than ever, I think we can all agree: car ❤️”
Reposted by clarabellum
taking a time machine to warn 2012 shefali that the future is full of gkmc erasure :(
February 10, 2025 at 1:59 PM
taking a time machine to warn 2012 shefali that the future is full of gkmc erasure :(
Reposted by clarabellum
half time show 2025
February 10, 2025 at 3:14 AM
half time show 2025
the way Patrick mahomes keeps chewing on his Invisalign is grossing me out and pissing me off
February 10, 2025 at 2:45 AM
the way Patrick mahomes keeps chewing on his Invisalign is grossing me out and pissing me off
“There used to be a strong belief in the NFL that the forward pass was cheating”
February 10, 2025 at 2:24 AM
“There used to be a strong belief in the NFL that the forward pass was cheating”
“OH NO ITS BACK” I said, upon seeing the flesh hat for the second time
February 10, 2025 at 2:10 AM
“OH NO ITS BACK” I said, upon seeing the flesh hat for the second time
Reposted by clarabellum
my husband heard the announcers say the chiefs are the best third down team in the league and now every time they do a third down he says “yeah but any other team would do worse. Any other quarterback’s head would have actually exploded”
February 10, 2025 at 2:00 AM
my husband heard the announcers say the chiefs are the best third down team in the league and now every time they do a third down he says “yeah but any other team would do worse. Any other quarterback’s head would have actually exploded”
Patrick mahomes needs to collect himself!!
February 10, 2025 at 12:51 AM
Patrick mahomes needs to collect himself!!
who are the young people in the Michelob ultra commercial
February 10, 2025 at 12:13 AM
who are the young people in the Michelob ultra commercial
my friend just told us his first two screen names were “doctormeatloaf” and “alwaysantibush” im screaming
February 9, 2025 at 5:53 PM
my friend just told us his first two screen names were “doctormeatloaf” and “alwaysantibush” im screaming
“I wouldn’t trust me either! I just beat up a kid in front of like a hundred people!” - #dungeonsanddragons
February 4, 2025 at 3:45 AM
“I wouldn’t trust me either! I just beat up a kid in front of like a hundred people!” - #dungeonsanddragons