Tor
@bittertea.bsky.social
Writer, zinester, library worker in Portland. Ex-evangelical abuse survivor. Bigender trans weirdo (they/them)
zines: bitterteahymnal.gumroad.com
website: torlowell.neocities.org
blog: thewrongkindoftestimony.neocities.org
zines: bitterteahymnal.gumroad.com
website: torlowell.neocities.org
blog: thewrongkindoftestimony.neocities.org
Pinned
Tor
@bittertea.bsky.social
· Nov 15
Hi bsky, you should follow me if you like rambly posts and zines about abuse/survivor issues, the trauma of growing up in evangelical christianity, & being genderweird & gay
Wearing a shirt that makes ppl gender me feminine is winning out over the facial hair which is fascinating because it's not even a women's shirt
November 29, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Wearing a shirt that makes ppl gender me feminine is winning out over the facial hair which is fascinating because it's not even a women's shirt
the funny thing is one of the only conversations i had with him involved him asking me if i could hear his tv at night (i could, he blared the thing) and then he was a lil defensive like “yeah i can hear you guys too” which surprised me bc most neighbors always remarked that we were real quiet
like literally presumed we were non-romantic roommates until he had to think abt there being two bedrooms and then was like “oh yeah, I met the guy who lived here, Tor right? I’ve talked to him before” & it’s like no, you don’t get to resolve AND THERE WERE ONLY TWO BEDROOMS by straightening me out
November 29, 2025 at 5:23 AM
the funny thing is one of the only conversations i had with him involved him asking me if i could hear his tv at night (i could, he blared the thing) and then he was a lil defensive like “yeah i can hear you guys too” which surprised me bc most neighbors always remarked that we were real quiet
I don’t have a deep and abiding fear of being trapped, locked, hemmed in, unable to change my mind, without options, a fear that guides my every decision (or lack thereof).
[yes yes I do]
[yes yes I do]
November 28, 2025 at 8:48 PM
I don’t have a deep and abiding fear of being trapped, locked, hemmed in, unable to change my mind, without options, a fear that guides my every decision (or lack thereof).
[yes yes I do]
[yes yes I do]
Reposted by Tor
“No,” said Frog.
November 28, 2025 at 8:37 AM
“No,” said Frog.
gendered masculine in the worst possible way
November 27, 2025 at 10:08 PM
gendered masculine in the worst possible way
Reposted by Tor
every time something feels good in this house i get an equal and opposite obsessive intrusive thought that this house is secretly Bad and they missed something in inspection and we are going to slowly die here
November 27, 2025 at 7:23 AM
every time something feels good in this house i get an equal and opposite obsessive intrusive thought that this house is secretly Bad and they missed something in inspection and we are going to slowly die here
I wish I was more competent at everything I ever do
November 26, 2025 at 10:15 PM
I wish I was more competent at everything I ever do
time of year when everyone asks what you’re doing for the holidays and it’s not considered polite to be like “my family is evil and I don’t have contact with them”
November 26, 2025 at 1:14 AM
time of year when everyone asks what you’re doing for the holidays and it’s not considered polite to be like “my family is evil and I don’t have contact with them”
My coworker at the library I've never told my pronouns to "she--they"d me constantly when talking about me and I have no idea if the county library worker information exchange means someone from the library I am out at informed ppl at this library what my pronouns are
November 25, 2025 at 11:18 PM
My coworker at the library I've never told my pronouns to "she--they"d me constantly when talking about me and I have no idea if the county library worker information exchange means someone from the library I am out at informed ppl at this library what my pronouns are
Reposted by Tor
I'm researching the silent 1914 Wizard of Oz films and one of them has a Minecraft cat
November 25, 2025 at 3:02 PM
I'm researching the silent 1914 Wizard of Oz films and one of them has a Minecraft cat
Would like to not be a bundle of anxiety 24/7
November 25, 2025 at 6:38 PM
Would like to not be a bundle of anxiety 24/7
abolish all landlords, every single one
November 25, 2025 at 4:58 PM
abolish all landlords, every single one
☹️
Well it's been a good run. Mall Rats was created in the ashes of 90s consumerism @ Lloyd center. It was a great experiment & will continue with or without the mall! On that note come celebrate possibly our last Xmas there on Dec 20 & support small local artists! Thanks for ur years of support! ✌️🥨🐀🎄
November 25, 2025 at 4:55 AM
☹️
I'm making a pecan pie and my partner hates it when ppl call it "pee-can" and I have no reason to other than I'm a mean boyfriend
November 25, 2025 at 3:05 AM
I'm making a pecan pie and my partner hates it when ppl call it "pee-can" and I have no reason to other than I'm a mean boyfriend
Reposted by Tor
They should invent a city where every driver isn't trying to kill cyclists and pedestrians
November 23, 2025 at 8:01 PM
They should invent a city where every driver isn't trying to kill cyclists and pedestrians
13 years ago I visited portland for the first time and fell in love
(with portland, and the girl)
(with portland, and the girl)
November 23, 2025 at 7:11 PM
13 years ago I visited portland for the first time and fell in love
(with portland, and the girl)
(with portland, and the girl)
Reposted by Tor
From The Chromatic Fantasy by H.A.
"Do you have any hobbies outside of crime?"
"Do you have any hobbies outside of crime?"
November 23, 2025 at 6:57 AM
From The Chromatic Fantasy by H.A.
"Do you have any hobbies outside of crime?"
"Do you have any hobbies outside of crime?"
I got my first library job at 17
I’m also part of those millennials conservatives used to complain abt bc we only wanted to do “meaningful work.” I’m not sure i could handle a bullshit job
& unlike other customer service jobs, i rarely have to interact with money
I’m also part of those millennials conservatives used to complain abt bc we only wanted to do “meaningful work.” I’m not sure i could handle a bullshit job
& unlike other customer service jobs, i rarely have to interact with money
November 23, 2025 at 4:39 AM
I got my first library job at 17
I’m also part of those millennials conservatives used to complain abt bc we only wanted to do “meaningful work.” I’m not sure i could handle a bullshit job
& unlike other customer service jobs, i rarely have to interact with money
I’m also part of those millennials conservatives used to complain abt bc we only wanted to do “meaningful work.” I’m not sure i could handle a bullshit job
& unlike other customer service jobs, i rarely have to interact with money
Reposted by Tor
The way supposed allies react with shock when I tell them blockers suck give teenagers hormones and don't require parental consent 👍
as I said, puberty blockers were always a bad compromise, trans kids deserve HRT and the cis will never be happy either way so compromising with them on a solution that is bad for trans kids was always gonna backfire
And let's not even get started on the absurdity of looking for a positive impact from a preventative measure, where the expected outcome is "not getting worse"
Puberty blockers had no measurable impact on divorce rates, therefore ineffective treatment.
Puberty blockers had no measurable impact on divorce rates, therefore ineffective treatment.
November 22, 2025 at 11:38 AM
The way supposed allies react with shock when I tell them blockers suck give teenagers hormones and don't require parental consent 👍
don't look at porn on the library's computers
We do ask you to leave for that
We do ask you to leave for that
November 23, 2025 at 2:25 AM
don't look at porn on the library's computers
We do ask you to leave for that
We do ask you to leave for that
He, her, them, person, lady, sir, ma'am, him, this individual, miss,
Guess I really am living the non-binary life
Guess I really am living the non-binary life
November 22, 2025 at 8:24 PM
He, her, them, person, lady, sir, ma'am, him, this individual, miss,
Guess I really am living the non-binary life
Guess I really am living the non-binary life
The library worker morning prayer:
May patrons be normal today
May patrons be normal today
November 22, 2025 at 5:32 PM
The library worker morning prayer:
May patrons be normal today
May patrons be normal today
Desperately need a haircut
November 22, 2025 at 2:57 AM
Desperately need a haircut