Matt Botts
@astrobotts.bsky.social
Security and Compliance geek, law school dropout, error-prone computer made of meat, ex-Wisconsinite. Opinions are my own.
Stupid sandwich, this is all your fault.
November 21, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Stupid sandwich, this is all your fault.
Yeah! Take that, BK Kids Club!
November 19, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Yeah! Take that, BK Kids Club!
I thought about the race car driver. How he drove around that track with cunning speed, yet, he drove home in a Buick Skylark to race his trans-am slot car.
I think about the race car driver, driving his Buick car home to his slot car. The same car that would drive him to a slot in death’s ledger.
I think about the race car driver, driving his Buick car home to his slot car. The same car that would drive him to a slot in death’s ledger.
November 17, 2025 at 5:13 PM
I thought about the race car driver. How he drove around that track with cunning speed, yet, he drove home in a Buick Skylark to race his trans-am slot car.
I think about the race car driver, driving his Buick car home to his slot car. The same car that would drive him to a slot in death’s ledger.
I think about the race car driver, driving his Buick car home to his slot car. The same car that would drive him to a slot in death’s ledger.
Plus he is still refusing to to return General Santa Anna’s leg to Mexico. If you would like to join the movement to return the leg to the Mexican people, write Illinois Senator Richard J. Durbin. Thank you, and good night.
November 11, 2025 at 4:47 AM
Plus he is still refusing to to return General Santa Anna’s leg to Mexico. If you would like to join the movement to return the leg to the Mexican people, write Illinois Senator Richard J. Durbin. Thank you, and good night.
This one’s evergreen:
November 10, 2025 at 1:23 AM
This one’s evergreen:
My wife very kindly bought fun-sized candy bars. I ate most, then claimed to be a “full sized bar house, now and forever.”
I bought full bars and 24 beers for parents.
We’ve had zero trick-or-treaters and it’s 8 pm.
I bought full bars and 24 beers for parents.
We’ve had zero trick-or-treaters and it’s 8 pm.
November 1, 2025 at 2:42 AM
My wife very kindly bought fun-sized candy bars. I ate most, then claimed to be a “full sized bar house, now and forever.”
I bought full bars and 24 beers for parents.
We’ve had zero trick-or-treaters and it’s 8 pm.
I bought full bars and 24 beers for parents.
We’ve had zero trick-or-treaters and it’s 8 pm.
My steak is going to be so good y’all!
October 29, 2025 at 2:34 AM
My steak is going to be so good y’all!
We watched Good Boy with our two good boys. Fozzie Bear was very upset when the screen dog made sad noises.
October 27, 2025 at 4:17 AM
We watched Good Boy with our two good boys. Fozzie Bear was very upset when the screen dog made sad noises.
I’m taking the plunge - going to redecorate my office like a video store.
I’m hoping it has the added benefit of throwing people off when it looks like I’m working in 1992.
Right now, what I’ve got looks more like the creepy porn closets those stores had.
I’m hoping it has the added benefit of throwing people off when it looks like I’m working in 1992.
Right now, what I’ve got looks more like the creepy porn closets those stores had.
October 15, 2025 at 11:12 PM
I’m taking the plunge - going to redecorate my office like a video store.
I’m hoping it has the added benefit of throwing people off when it looks like I’m working in 1992.
Right now, what I’ve got looks more like the creepy porn closets those stores had.
I’m hoping it has the added benefit of throwing people off when it looks like I’m working in 1992.
Right now, what I’ve got looks more like the creepy porn closets those stores had.
Me trying to explain to my mother how her Apple TV device is different from the Apple TV app on her TV.
October 13, 2025 at 9:01 PM
Me trying to explain to my mother how her Apple TV device is different from the Apple TV app on her TV.
Praying for Portland. My friend sent me a photo of the Max light rail, and it’s heartbreaking.
October 8, 2025 at 9:07 PM
Praying for Portland. My friend sent me a photo of the Max light rail, and it’s heartbreaking.
Woody has gone MAGA!
September 26, 2025 at 11:51 AM
Woody has gone MAGA!
Visited Wuhan in May 2013. Having parents encourage their small children to rub my belly while pantomiming how big it is was in no way a giant blow to my ego.
September 6, 2025 at 12:02 AM
Visited Wuhan in May 2013. Having parents encourage their small children to rub my belly while pantomiming how big it is was in no way a giant blow to my ego.
A really cute old lab had the audacity to walk by.
August 29, 2025 at 4:11 AM
A really cute old lab had the audacity to walk by.
Make yourself a big spreadsheet. Columns for date, company, role, contacts at the company, notes , status (applied,no response,actively interviewing,rejected,accepted), and then 4 columns where you list the name of the people interviewing you. For every company you want to apply to, add a new row.
August 7, 2025 at 11:19 PM
Make yourself a big spreadsheet. Columns for date, company, role, contacts at the company, notes , status (applied,no response,actively interviewing,rejected,accepted), and then 4 columns where you list the name of the people interviewing you. For every company you want to apply to, add a new row.
My mom trained me to put them back in individually labeled Rubbermaid boxes in the early 90’s. I still regret mixing my old sets when lived in apts. now I’m meticulous with my Star Wars sets.
July 20, 2025 at 6:35 PM
My mom trained me to put them back in individually labeled Rubbermaid boxes in the early 90’s. I still regret mixing my old sets when lived in apts. now I’m meticulous with my Star Wars sets.
“Then they will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and not help you?’
And he will answer, ‘I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.’”
Matthew 25:42-46
And he will answer, ‘I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.’”
Matthew 25:42-46
July 17, 2025 at 7:11 PM
“Then they will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and not help you?’
And he will answer, ‘I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.’”
Matthew 25:42-46
And he will answer, ‘I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.’”
Matthew 25:42-46
Sheriff Lobo protects us from the cute pug mix that has the audacity to walk by.
July 16, 2025 at 4:24 PM
Sheriff Lobo protects us from the cute pug mix that has the audacity to walk by.
Don’t promise us a good time if you can’t deliver!
July 14, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Don’t promise us a good time if you can’t deliver!