Rachel Henderson
@angryappletree.bsky.social
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
In the sixth month
of a disastrous reign in the house of money
in the street of money in the city of money in the country of money,
our great country of money, we (forgive us)
lived happily during the war
of a disastrous reign in the house of money
in the street of money in the city of money in the country of money,
our great country of money, we (forgive us)
lived happily during the war
December 7, 2025 at 3:39 AM
In the sixth month
of a disastrous reign in the house of money
in the street of money in the city of money in the country of money,
our great country of money, we (forgive us)
lived happily during the war
of a disastrous reign in the house of money
in the street of money in the city of money in the country of money,
our great country of money, we (forgive us)
lived happily during the war
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
Hi everybody,
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
Join The Onion
Don’t just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.
membership.theonion.com
November 28, 2025 at 4:39 PM
Hi everybody,
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
A Trump supporter started murdering his way through an assassination list of Democratic law makers FIVE MONTHS AGO. He murdered my colleague Melissa Hortman, and her husband Mark — and attempted to assassinate my dear friend John Hoffman and his wife Yvette. I was also on the hit list. WTF
November 20, 2025 at 5:56 PM
A Trump supporter started murdering his way through an assassination list of Democratic law makers FIVE MONTHS AGO. He murdered my colleague Melissa Hortman, and her husband Mark — and attempted to assassinate my dear friend John Hoffman and his wife Yvette. I was also on the hit list. WTF
The absolute least we should be able to expect out of modern society is to keep botulism out of baby formula
A botulism outbreak that has sickened more than two dozen babies in 15 states has been linked to ByHeart formula sold nationwide. Here's what to know about it. n.pr/3Kf6Ly2
Recalled baby formula linked to a botulism outbreak may still be in some stores
A botulism outbreak that has sickened more than two dozen babies in 15 states has been linked to ByHeart formula sold nationwide. Here's what to know about it.
n.pr
November 20, 2025 at 7:32 PM
The absolute least we should be able to expect out of modern society is to keep botulism out of baby formula
My entire life I’ve been told that there’s no possible morality outside of a religious belief, and now you’re saying that the (generally) secular left is TOO guided by morality? that was an abrupt turn.
Imagine looking around America in 2025 and thinking, "What we need less of is morality."
November 19, 2025 at 3:55 PM
My entire life I’ve been told that there’s no possible morality outside of a religious belief, and now you’re saying that the (generally) secular left is TOO guided by morality? that was an abrupt turn.
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
I’m also really upset that none of the other reporters, nobody in the room said anything - like I’m sorry, these people shout out questions all the time, but no one wanted to shout “did you seriously just call a woman Piggy”???
November 19, 2025 at 1:58 PM
I’m also really upset that none of the other reporters, nobody in the room said anything - like I’m sorry, these people shout out questions all the time, but no one wanted to shout “did you seriously just call a woman Piggy”???
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
Tax churches.
If they can prove they’re giving more away than they’re keeping or spending on non-essentials for members, great. Give them an individual tax break.
Make them prove their benevolence if they don’t want to pay in like everyone else.
If they can prove they’re giving more away than they’re keeping or spending on non-essentials for members, great. Give them an individual tax break.
Make them prove their benevolence if they don’t want to pay in like everyone else.
November 18, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Tax churches.
If they can prove they’re giving more away than they’re keeping or spending on non-essentials for members, great. Give them an individual tax break.
Make them prove their benevolence if they don’t want to pay in like everyone else.
If they can prove they’re giving more away than they’re keeping or spending on non-essentials for members, great. Give them an individual tax break.
Make them prove their benevolence if they don’t want to pay in like everyone else.
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
The fact that no one in the room stood up for her says a lot about how we got here bsky.app/profile/pale...
"Quiet! Quiet, Piggy."
November 18, 2025 at 2:55 PM
The fact that no one in the room stood up for her says a lot about how we got here bsky.app/profile/pale...
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
In the century leading up to 1975, nearly 6000 freighters went down in the Great Lakes.
The Edmund Fitzgerald was the last.
The last. In 50 years, not a single commercial freighter has been lost in the Great Lakes.
Why?
It's NOAA. Of course it's NOAA.
The Edmund Fitzgerald was the last.
The last. In 50 years, not a single commercial freighter has been lost in the Great Lakes.
Why?
It's NOAA. Of course it's NOAA.
November 11, 2025 at 1:50 AM
In the century leading up to 1975, nearly 6000 freighters went down in the Great Lakes.
The Edmund Fitzgerald was the last.
The last. In 50 years, not a single commercial freighter has been lost in the Great Lakes.
Why?
It's NOAA. Of course it's NOAA.
The Edmund Fitzgerald was the last.
The last. In 50 years, not a single commercial freighter has been lost in the Great Lakes.
Why?
It's NOAA. Of course it's NOAA.
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
once we’re through Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald day, we’re allowed to move onto the final Holiday Season of the year - (listening to A Long December by The Counting Crows)
November 11, 2025 at 1:11 AM
once we’re through Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald day, we’re allowed to move onto the final Holiday Season of the year - (listening to A Long December by The Counting Crows)
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
Since 1990, the emissions share of the richest 1% has increased by 13%, and the richest 0.1% has grown by 32%, while the poorest 50% has decreased by 3%.
policy-practice.oxfam.org/resources/cl...
policy-practice.oxfam.org/resources/cl...
November 10, 2025 at 9:01 AM
Since 1990, the emissions share of the richest 1% has increased by 13%, and the richest 0.1% has grown by 32%, while the poorest 50% has decreased by 3%.
policy-practice.oxfam.org/resources/cl...
policy-practice.oxfam.org/resources/cl...
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
New rule: if you have enough money for a private island, you have to stay on it.
November 6, 2025 at 10:35 PM
New rule: if you have enough money for a private island, you have to stay on it.
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
Rest in peace, Dr. Jane Goodall💚
October 1, 2025 at 6:22 PM
Rest in peace, Dr. Jane Goodall💚
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
I dream of living in a world where flooding your friends' social media posts with "jokes" about sexual assault actually set off alarms *before* the person did a shooting...
ICE shooter Joshua Jahn's politics aren't what's being reported, three longtime former friends tell me.
www.kenklippenstein.com/p/the-ice-sh...
www.kenklippenstein.com/p/the-ice-sh...
The ICE Shooter’s Motive
Joshua Jahn's friends speak
www.kenklippenstein.com
September 25, 2025 at 1:09 PM
I dream of living in a world where flooding your friends' social media posts with "jokes" about sexual assault actually set off alarms *before* the person did a shooting...
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
James Dobson is dead, was a monster: defector.com/james-dobson...
James Dobson Is Dead, Was A Monster | Defector
James Dobson was a nasty dude. He liked to beat children and dogs with a belt and to rain misery and punishment on the vulnerable; we know all of this about him because he said as much in public,…
defector.com
August 21, 2025 at 8:51 PM
James Dobson is dead, was a monster: defector.com/james-dobson...
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
My 8-year-old made their own version of the game Life, and it's way more accurate than the original. The path is convoluted. The rules change on a whim (but always in favor of the game's creator). The real estate is outlandishly expensive. The jobs pay either $9K or $999,999K. The goal is unclear.
July 28, 2025 at 11:55 PM
My 8-year-old made their own version of the game Life, and it's way more accurate than the original. The path is convoluted. The rules change on a whim (but always in favor of the game's creator). The real estate is outlandishly expensive. The jobs pay either $9K or $999,999K. The goal is unclear.
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the secretary of Health and Human Services, and Brooke Rollins, secretary of Agriculture, have suggested that bird flu virus should be left to "rip" through poultry farms across the U.S. — but experts warn that this approach could hasten the beginning of a new pandemic
RFK's proposal to let bird flu spread through poultry could set us up for a pandemic, experts warn
HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and Secretary of Agriculture Brooke Rollins have expressed interest in letting H5N1 outbreaks spread unchecked through U.S. poultry farms. Health experts warn it co...
www.livescience.com
July 5, 2025 at 10:38 AM
Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the secretary of Health and Human Services, and Brooke Rollins, secretary of Agriculture, have suggested that bird flu virus should be left to "rip" through poultry farms across the U.S. — but experts warn that this approach could hasten the beginning of a new pandemic
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
"Maersk will cut ties with companies linked to illegal Israeli settlements on the occupied West Bank, the Danish shipping giant has said....Its shipments have come under scrutiny as part of an international campaign led by the Palestinian Youth Movement (PYM)"
www.yahoo.com/news/shippin...
www.yahoo.com/news/shippin...
Shipping giant Maersk divests from companies linked to Israeli settlements
Move follows campaign accusing Maersk of links to Israel’s military and occupation of Palestinian lands.
www.yahoo.com
June 24, 2025 at 5:43 PM
"Maersk will cut ties with companies linked to illegal Israeli settlements on the occupied West Bank, the Danish shipping giant has said....Its shipments have come under scrutiny as part of an international campaign led by the Palestinian Youth Movement (PYM)"
www.yahoo.com/news/shippin...
www.yahoo.com/news/shippin...
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
Reposted by Rachel Henderson
World War 3 kinda sucks, but you know, it was either this or pronouns
June 22, 2025 at 5:08 AM
World War 3 kinda sucks, but you know, it was either this or pronouns