The time on my microwave is finally correct. Oh hell yea!

It’s time to get back down to basics*

*calling white people crackers

“Holy shit! Is that a fucking spider??” -you looking at a piece of lint

If I ask you the time and you say “Quarter til” or “10 til” Go fuck yourself. I clearly don’t know what time it is. I’m asking for answers I’m not asking for hints.

“I’m gonna drink the first thing that comes out of them thangs!” -first guy to drink milk

Another year older and another year where meeting up to exchange briefcases in a steamy alleyway becomes unlikely.

What if we had big brains instead of big bugs. Surely that would fix this messed up country. #deepthinking #manosphere #alpha #money #content #kony2012

“Wow… everything’s computer.”

Coming up with numbers is so easy when you’re a genius like me. 102. See? Shit comes so easy to me. 507. Not even sweating my, dear boy. 800,102. 🏂

I don’t wanna be the kind of person that sits around and just lets something like Thirty Seconds to Mars happen. It’s important to be active in your communities.

@andybobrow.bsky.social can we get your writing tips thread here on Bluesky now that Twitter is bricked? Also, I would add, having a character say, “awooga” and with steam coming out their ears to show they find someone attractive. At least have their tongue roll out and roll back in

I am a real human person that is screaming and vomiting