Adam Papes
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slowsand.bsky.social
Adam Papes
@slowsand.bsky.social
impersonal person impersonator (thee / thy)
bio.site/slowsand
Reposted by Adam Papes
KATIE WILSON LEADS BY 1,346!
November 12, 2025 at 12:02 AM
I always had a crush on the Fifth Beatle.
November 11, 2025 at 7:23 PM
This is hard to talk about, because it doesn’t seem like a true story, but at the semen analysis lab, they had a Hustlers “promo only” DVD, so when I played it as a very private joke, I was horrified to find it was medical porn, iodine-soaked dick and scrubs.
November 11, 2025 at 12:03 AM
I want an adult playground. 21+ no holds barred
November 9, 2025 at 9:21 PM
If my Russian Middle-School algebra teacher could see the D+ I got in college precalc, she’d be rolling around in the grave she’d dig for me
November 8, 2025 at 7:13 PM
Like most websites, I also don’t function well if you refuse me cookies.
November 7, 2025 at 7:18 PM
I feel like I’m primed to learn Braille fast because I play Tetris.
November 6, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Do I need to play Sims 3 to relearn how to make adult friends quickly?
November 5, 2025 at 12:26 AM
Men will invent the Carber Hot Dog Vacuum instead of going to therapy #itysl
November 3, 2025 at 6:32 PM
Children should be forbidden from singing, if only to keep bad things from happening in horror films
November 2, 2025 at 10:27 PM
Is the Michael Jackson definition of “bad” now evil, or should I want to eat a badass?
November 1, 2025 at 4:44 PM
Reposted by Adam Papes
October 31, 2025 at 10:09 PM
If you cancel on me, I’m cancelling you. Happy Halloween, fucker!
October 31, 2025 at 6:55 PM
It’s really fun that the impetus behind all Star Wars is to fight fascism, all the while that fandom’s biggest fanatics are all, to a person, mecha-fascists.
October 31, 2025 at 1:32 AM
On my 40th, I’mma drink 10 Four Lokos at Señor Frog’s
October 29, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Reposted by Adam Papes
the swamp of despair (from 2018)
March 11, 2025 at 5:38 AM
You don’t have to be a herstorian to know to take the his out of hersterectomy.
October 28, 2025 at 2:00 AM
Me pretending to not notice my nemesis’s haircut: “There’s something the same about you.”
October 26, 2025 at 12:30 AM
No money, no problems
October 22, 2025 at 7:44 PM
If my costume was a little kid, could I get candy?
October 20, 2025 at 2:42 AM
They say the best candy is safeguarded in gated communities, so hop that gate, ghoulie!
October 18, 2025 at 11:17 PM
Do dumb people go to therapy? My therapist won’t tell me.
October 17, 2025 at 7:49 PM
Can @ticketmaster.com resale tickets come with a personalized email to the scalper, like “Fuck you!”? I will pay double.
October 16, 2025 at 7:43 PM
Turns out Seattle’s Aikido (the martial artist of peace) dojo has a liability form including my family can’t get mad in the case of my death
October 15, 2025 at 8:09 PM
Max Basic sounds less like streaming-but-with-ads & more like the name of any billionaire fuck media CEO
October 14, 2025 at 2:07 AM