River Scott
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riverscott.bsky.social
River Scott
@riverscott.bsky.social
Award-winning queer writer, podcaster, 'comedian', tart
Olympic-level flirt
GET YOUR TICKETS TO MY LIVE SHOWS! https://linktr.ee/riverscott
Manchester & London
Oldeat selfie on your phone

Yeah...
November 9, 2025 at 12:57 PM
Reposted by River Scott
i hope this is how you find out about dick cheney
November 4, 2025 at 11:44 AM
A big one, every Sunday. Often with subtitles.
A female sex demon is called a succubus. A male sex demon is called an incubus. A non-binary sex demon is called an omnibus.
October 29, 2025 at 10:39 AM
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If I pay you £100 to come over to my house and you pay me £100 to leave we’ve added £200 to the GDP by creating a haulage company. And over the next year I’ll be using this 10 times per day every day and I value this company at £730,000. We hope to figure out how to get rid of travel costs by 2028
October 29, 2025 at 9:36 AM
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Reminder that Violent J of Insane Clown Posse has the correct response to a lot of the shitty things he said in the early days.
October 21, 2025 at 3:58 PM
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It's official she's the anti jkr
I knew Jill, she lived a few doors down from me back when I lived in Cornwall, I went to school with her son & I used to swim in her pool. We kept in touch; when I came out as trans, I emailed her to tell her my new name, she was excited for me and supported me. She was incredibly lovely. I miss her
October 19, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Quote this with a selfie if you're Gay Dead (single and over 30)
I have several issues with that sentence, but hey:
October 14, 2025 at 3:11 PM
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MANCHESTER! Join me for stories about getting seduced by a twink.
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?
Find out on Wednesday, just off Canal St!
October 4, 2025 at 2:22 PM
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My show contains a quick explainer on how to take good 🍆 pics.
You laugh, you learn stuff, i get to wear a pretty dress and swear like a sailor. Everyone's happy!
Join me, won't you?
October 5, 2025 at 3:56 PM
My show contains a quick explainer on how to take good 🍆 pics.
You laugh, you learn stuff, i get to wear a pretty dress and swear like a sailor. Everyone's happy!
Join me, won't you?
October 5, 2025 at 3:56 PM
MANCHESTER! Join me for stories about getting seduced by a twink.
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?
Find out on Wednesday, just off Canal St!
October 4, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Manchester! I'm doing my standup show in a couple of weeks and I'd love it if you could come and laugh at ny nob jokes and filthy stories about being an ageing tart.
September 28, 2025 at 5:34 PM
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Matt Berry and Simon Pegg in particular fucking hurt…. Uggg. Hope they love their blood money.
Fuck them all.
September 10, 2025 at 6:20 PM
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Iconic moment at the Downton Abbey premiere
September 4, 2025 at 6:30 AM
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Anyone who posts pictures with a hotter friend on a dating profile is an idiot, any gay who references Harry Potter on their dating profile is a transphobe.
August 30, 2025 at 2:05 PM
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Just remembering the time he was clearly off his face in Parliament, no reason.
August 29, 2025 at 9:12 PM
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I'm ded 💀 😂 😂 😂
August 28, 2025 at 9:22 AM
August 27, 2025 at 4:59 PM
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🤗
August 23, 2025 at 9:51 PM
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We've all been there, Jill.
August 21, 2025 at 10:56 PM
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TONIGHT! EAST LONDON! Stories of queer strumpetry, ageing joyfully, and generally growing old without growing up.
There's still a few tickets left so come on down to Love Affair Basement on Hackney Road and enjoy some quality nob jokes!
August 20, 2025 at 11:50 AM
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When the church reverses it beeps like a delivery van, just in case anyone forgets to pay attention to the direction of 1,252 tonnes of church and machinery.
August 20, 2025 at 12:25 PM
TONIGHT! EAST LONDON! Stories of queer strumpetry, ageing joyfully, and generally growing old without growing up.
There's still a few tickets left so come on down to Love Affair Basement on Hackney Road and enjoy some quality nob jokes!
August 20, 2025 at 11:50 AM
Reposted by River Scott
professional activists and institutional intellectuals be like:
August 13, 2025 at 1:35 PM
Reposted by River Scott
27 years ago, two years after the introduction of effective HIV treatment, the Bay Area Reporter, San Francisco’s lesbian and gay community newspaper, ran ‘No Obits’ as its headline.
It was the first edition not to report an AIDS death in almost 15 years.
August 13, 2025 at 6:56 AM