RemissGnome
@remissgnome.bsky.social
Loveable rapscallion with a heart of gold.
Easily the best $75 you can spend on today, capitalism's holiday.
Got my subscription a few months ago and it's easily the best thing that comes in my mailbox. I sit crosslegged on my couch laughing at it.
Got my subscription a few months ago and it's easily the best thing that comes in my mailbox. I sit crosslegged on my couch laughing at it.
Hi everybody,
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
Join The Onion
Don’t just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.
membership.theonion.com
November 28, 2025 at 10:20 PM
Easily the best $75 you can spend on today, capitalism's holiday.
Got my subscription a few months ago and it's easily the best thing that comes in my mailbox. I sit crosslegged on my couch laughing at it.
Got my subscription a few months ago and it's easily the best thing that comes in my mailbox. I sit crosslegged on my couch laughing at it.
Reposted by RemissGnome
Remember that time that hockey team had a contest for teachers to crawl in their hands and knees collecting school supplies for their classrooms?
November 26, 2025 at 7:03 PM
Remember that time that hockey team had a contest for teachers to crawl in their hands and knees collecting school supplies for their classrooms?
They need to remake Waterworld.
November 25, 2025 at 4:09 AM
They need to remake Waterworld.
Are we still dicks out for Harambe in 2025?
Seriously, aren't they cold by now?
Seriously, aren't they cold by now?
November 20, 2025 at 5:41 AM
Are we still dicks out for Harambe in 2025?
Seriously, aren't they cold by now?
Seriously, aren't they cold by now?
Hi @katmabu.bsky.social, since 🧊 is near me now, is there any advice you can give us for fighting the deportation of my neighbors?
I watch what y'all did in Chicago and we want to keep the pressure on them down here.
I watch what y'all did in Chicago and we want to keep the pressure on them down here.
November 17, 2025 at 4:43 AM
Hi @katmabu.bsky.social, since 🧊 is near me now, is there any advice you can give us for fighting the deportation of my neighbors?
I watch what y'all did in Chicago and we want to keep the pressure on them down here.
I watch what y'all did in Chicago and we want to keep the pressure on them down here.
Mama mia my spaghett
Trump trade war costs US Italian pasta: “Exporters say import and antidumping duties totaling 107% on their pasta brands will make doing business in America too costly and are preparing to pull out of U.S. stores as soon as January.” Via WSJ
Italian Pasta Is Poised to Disappear From American Grocery Shelves — The Wall Street Journal
Trump administration is set to impose duties of 107% on Italian pasta imports, among most punitive of tariffs it has levied
apple.news
November 10, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Mama mia my spaghett
Biscuits and gravy is just dry flour mixed with wet flour.
November 7, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Biscuits and gravy is just dry flour mixed with wet flour.
I promise. One day I will do something with the domain names I own. One day...
November 6, 2025 at 6:30 AM
I promise. One day I will do something with the domain names I own. One day...
This is how my week has been.
November 4, 2025 at 5:00 PM
This is how my week has been.
Toddlers running around holding a phone while you're on a FaceTime call with them will never get old.
October 29, 2025 at 11:46 PM
Toddlers running around holding a phone while you're on a FaceTime call with them will never get old.
So when is Steven Segael joining ICE?
Seems like it would be something he would be in to and ICE seems like a good fit for someone of his caliber.
Seems like it would be something he would be in to and ICE seems like a good fit for someone of his caliber.
October 27, 2025 at 5:53 PM
So when is Steven Segael joining ICE?
Seems like it would be something he would be in to and ICE seems like a good fit for someone of his caliber.
Seems like it would be something he would be in to and ICE seems like a good fit for someone of his caliber.
Reposted by RemissGnome
Spreading awareness. My friend’s daughter (15) is currently in the hospital fighting Leukemia. I want to share their story and GoFund to help support. If you have the means to help and donate, please do.
www.gofundme.com/f/help-ionna...
www.gofundme.com/f/help-ionna...
Donate to Help Ionna (15) Fight Leukemia: A Mother's Plea, organized by Jawanna Reynolds
A Mother’s Plea/Battle to Save Her Daughter from Leukemia
On Octo… Jawanna Reynolds needs your support for Help Ionna (15) Fight Leukemia: A Mother's Plea
www.gofundme.com
October 25, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Spreading awareness. My friend’s daughter (15) is currently in the hospital fighting Leukemia. I want to share their story and GoFund to help support. If you have the means to help and donate, please do.
www.gofundme.com/f/help-ionna...
www.gofundme.com/f/help-ionna...
Life sucks.
I hate the mirror again.
I hate the mirror again.
October 23, 2025 at 4:40 PM
Life sucks.
I hate the mirror again.
I hate the mirror again.
Y'all remember that time the 8th grade English teacher Mrs. Cherry was cheating with the softball coach Mr. Douglas? That was crazy.
October 14, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Y'all remember that time the 8th grade English teacher Mrs. Cherry was cheating with the softball coach Mr. Douglas? That was crazy.
Realized I didn't have any merch from my latest favorite band @durrymusic.bsky.social. So I fixed that tonight by getting myself a little birthday gift!
Go get some and support indie music! store.durrymusic.com?country=US
Go get some and support indie music! store.durrymusic.com?country=US
October 9, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Realized I didn't have any merch from my latest favorite band @durrymusic.bsky.social. So I fixed that tonight by getting myself a little birthday gift!
Go get some and support indie music! store.durrymusic.com?country=US
Go get some and support indie music! store.durrymusic.com?country=US
Playing Wolfenstein to feel something.
October 8, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Playing Wolfenstein to feel something.
They control The House, The Senate, The White House, and The Court. But they have the audacity to blame the Democrats. Just amazing.
October 1, 2025 at 4:51 AM
They control The House, The Senate, The White House, and The Court. But they have the audacity to blame the Democrats. Just amazing.
Y'all remember when Bob Dole did a Viagra commercial?
The 90s were crazy
The 90s were crazy
September 30, 2025 at 3:44 AM
Y'all remember when Bob Dole did a Viagra commercial?
The 90s were crazy
The 90s were crazy
Ronald Reagan was left-handed and you know he hated that.
September 25, 2025 at 4:24 AM
Ronald Reagan was left-handed and you know he hated that.
I'm curious, when was the last time you logged into Facebook?
September 9, 2025 at 2:03 AM
I'm curious, when was the last time you logged into Facebook?
I want the internet to return to its roots. I want the old Angelfire and Geocities internet.
Everything is too polished and needs more glitter gifs.
Everything is too polished and needs more glitter gifs.
September 7, 2025 at 2:48 AM
I want the internet to return to its roots. I want the old Angelfire and Geocities internet.
Everything is too polished and needs more glitter gifs.
Everything is too polished and needs more glitter gifs.
I wish George Carlin was alive to see today.
September 6, 2025 at 6:44 PM
I wish George Carlin was alive to see today.
Remember the time the future HHS secretary said he has worms in his brain?
Those were simpler times.
Those were simpler times.
August 28, 2025 at 11:58 PM
Remember the time the future HHS secretary said he has worms in his brain?
Those were simpler times.
Those were simpler times.