Mom, your opinions of my personal life, is like asbestos. It used to matter because thats the only thing I had. But now, it’s giving me fucking cancer. So just shut the fuck up. He’s not your life partner and my baby ain’t your child.

“I would never pick him as my spouse! What did I do wrong as a mom that led to this decision! You’re a disappointment!”
At least I didn’t pick someone who’s a serial cheater and a wife beater. And guess what, you ain’t his type either. You’re too cray cray and delusional.

“You’re raising your child wrong.” my mom
“Really? You raised me wrong I reckon” me
“How fucking dare you! How fucking dare you judge my parenting!”
“You just judged my parenting” me pointing out the obvious
“I sacrificed EVERYTHING for you and this is how you repay me?” My hypocritical mom

So let me get this straight, you’re expecting me to clean after your literal shit stains in the toilet, after I feed the baby, clean the baby, feed myself, clean myself and clean the house? I already handle the baby shit, the dog’s shit, my own shit! You can’t even clean your OWN man shit?!

Why do I find men useless after having children?
They can’t juggle feeding the baby, cleaning and feeding myself all at the same time.
So fuck off

What I love about my mother’s group catch up?
Day drinking, from my Stanley cup, disguised as maintaining my hydration.

“Well, the good thing is we all did it so you’ll be fine.” Said a balding middle age white man about raising children and working the same time. Yes, I’m sure you can relate, to my pain of breast feeding, pumping, waking up for night feeds PLUS working full time and trying to prove I can do it all.

Share your experience of people’s reaction when you tell them how much you hate your child who ruined the body that you worked hard for? How much you hate being a mother because that erased all your other identifies you’ve worked hard for? And how dying would be easier than parenthood.
Anyone?

I have never felt such overwhelming and intense rage towards my parents, until I had my own child. Having my own child made me realised how horrible a childhood I had and how much my parents used me as a pawn in their sick sick sick game of power grabbing.

How do you process your resentment and rage from the miserable and cruel childhood you suffered but was told to be fucking grateful because your parents put a roof over your head, and kept you alive?

Mum always says that I will understand and love her more when I have my own kids. Guess what, having my own kid just makes me hate my parents more for the shit they put me through.
How do I even channel this rage? Cyanide?

My therapist said my inner child will heal when I become a parent. No it didn’t and the kid in me resents my parents even more. Especially when they try to show me how to look after a baby. Fuck off you weren’t even there! My skull is shaped so weird I can never be bald and it’s because of you!

Don’t you LOVE being a mother?

No, I don’t. Motherhood feels like I got ran over by a cement truck , and somehow there’s this THING dangling off my titties that if I shut my eyes and walk away for a bit it may die so
NO I DON’T love being a mother.

I wish there’s a dating app for mothers group. I am sick of these supportive shit that don’t provide any actual solution. “Poor you, It’s just a normal regression!” Bitch I want to know if I alternate pain meds does it mean I can double dose this little shit who refuses to sleep?

It’s 11pm. I’m pumping (AGAIN) after doing the dishes, hanging up laundry, dream fed our baby, cleaned all bottles… while he’s snoring away in bed. God gives me strength to resist the temptation of making my child fatherless tonight.

FFS
You sleep, you don’t sleep?!
Make a fucking decision kid! I have sang you’re my sunshine a hundred times and you’re still fighting sleep! At this rate I just want my fucking sunshine to burn me alive.

He takes the baby out to watch a game with mates and tells me to “relax and do something” while it took me fucking one and half hour to tidy up, pump, clean bottles and sanitise shit before I can finally lie down to relax. Aaaand they are home.
Thanks for the an hour and half “relaxation time”.