Captain_Pickleshanks
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pickleshanks.bsky.social
Captain_Pickleshanks
@pickleshanks.bsky.social
Friendly Pickle; filled with love and acceptance; no rizz. Allied with the Rainbow Mafia. Friendses with transes. Diabeetus 1 enjoyer & a raging autist He/Him
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December 9, 2025 at 2:53 PM
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My regards are literally the best. It is over for you bitches.
Nothing worse than signing an email "warm regards" and getting a reply with "warmest regards". Oh, now it's ON.
"kindest regards" alright alright calm down
December 9, 2025 at 2:57 PM
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New Sympathetic Alarm Clock Just Lets You Sleep
December 9, 2025 at 3:00 PM
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Jimmy Fallon: "And do you use ChatGPT when raising your baby?"

Sam Altman: "I cannot imagine figuring out how to raise a newborn without ChatGPT."
December 9, 2025 at 3:01 PM
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The only way our political, economic, and cultural future is in jeopardy is if huge numbers of people like Stupid Bullshit That Sucks
December 9, 2025 at 3:09 PM
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Fraternity Under Investigation After Forcing Pledges To Volunteer At Soup Kitchen
November 25, 2025 at 6:02 PM
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imagine having to hear shit like "study confirms giving diabetic children insulin reduces their death rates by 100%" as if that hasn't been known for like a hunred years. that's what being trans is like
November 25, 2025 at 12:06 PM
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A gentle reminder that there is zero evidence the the rate of people being Autistic has increased.

@nytimes.com is misreporting the fact that rates of Autism Spectrum Disorder has increased since it was introduced as a diagnosis in 2013 by equating that to the number of Autistic ppl who exist.
Autism rates have increased in recent decades, but the reasons are more complicated than what Robert F. Kennedy Jr. has presented. Hear more on today's episode of "The Daily." nyti.ms/480eqtm
The Autism Diagnosis Problem
Autism rates have increased in recent decades, but the reasons are more complicated than what Robert F. Kennedy Jr. has presented.
nyti.ms
November 25, 2025 at 6:09 PM
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November 25, 2025 at 1:40 AM
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December 27, 2024 at 9:19 PM
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one thing about me, i will impulsively buy myself anything i want because money is not real and i have no restraint
November 21, 2025 at 2:02 PM
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There is nothing worse than biting into a soggy pickle
November 18, 2025 at 3:33 AM
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transphobes are like 'leaves are inherently green'. the 'green-ness' is stored inside the 'leaf-ness'
November 3, 2025 at 1:08 AM
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It SOUNDED like a good idea... 😅
October 31, 2025 at 12:42 AM
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it's not FOR us
October 10, 2025 at 1:02 PM
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i would bet money the insanely scammy survival food kit commercials that walk viewers step by step through "what is a qr code" and "how do i scan a qr code with my dang phone" are the most profitable commercials in the playoffs
October 9, 2025 at 12:08 AM
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One of the reasons they're having trouble concocting a Left Wing Terrorism epidemic is basically nobody in this country has ever met a left wing person. You might as well say we're being invaded by the smurfs
October 8, 2025 at 10:56 PM
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Scratch this from the record. Wanting to kill Pete Davidson is now praxis.
October 1, 2025 at 1:27 AM
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came out of lawrence of arabia just in time to watch a bunch of mets fans staring sadly off into the distance like lawrence at the end of lawrence of arabia
September 28, 2025 at 9:03 PM
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September 28, 2025 at 3:00 PM
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Once again vacuuming the kitchen table because it is the most efficient way to clean up a family mess.
September 27, 2025 at 1:13 AM
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September 27, 2025 at 3:11 AM