A cartoon by Benjamin Schwartz. #NewYorkerCartoons

This is Max. He snuck out in the middle of the night and walked 5 miles to get a breakfast burrito from a store that gave him one once. They hadn't opened yet when he got there, but Max was found the next morning thanks to his GPS collar patiently waiting outside for his well-earned snack. 14/10

the human. bought a device. for my bowl. that forces me. to eat slower. do they not understand. that eating at an extreme pace. is the one thing. i truly excel at