Morgoth's Lawyer
@morgothslawyer.bsky.social
I don't know man, there's just a lot going on right now.
Canadian, Former Touring Showpony, World Traveler, Parent, Exhausted.
Canadian, Former Touring Showpony, World Traveler, Parent, Exhausted.
Toronto, what's with the "hushed depression"? I'm from Vancouver - we would have rioted.
#worldseries #bluejays #mlb
#worldseries #bluejays #mlb
November 2, 2025 at 10:59 AM
Toronto, what's with the "hushed depression"? I'm from Vancouver - we would have rioted.
#worldseries #bluejays #mlb
#worldseries #bluejays #mlb
Didn't get one KPop demon hunter at our door last night, which was shocking. However, my niece dressed as the Tiger, and even had a flower pot as a candy bucket. She is truly the Chosen One. #kpopdemonhunters #huntrix #kpopdh
November 1, 2025 at 1:19 PM
Didn't get one KPop demon hunter at our door last night, which was shocking. However, my niece dressed as the Tiger, and even had a flower pot as a candy bucket. She is truly the Chosen One. #kpopdemonhunters #huntrix #kpopdh
Protect your children from trick or treating lest they begin saying "washroom" and start using the metric system for everything except weight, height, & oven temperature settings. #canada #halloween
Modern day Oct 31 North American Halloween traditions - dressing up or "guising", firecrackers, going door to door for candy, and saying "trick or treat" - all started in Canada around the turn of the 20th century. All of it.
It's not unholy or Satanic. It's Canadian.
#facts #halloween
It's not unholy or Satanic. It's Canadian.
#facts #halloween
October 31, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Protect your children from trick or treating lest they begin saying "washroom" and start using the metric system for everything except weight, height, & oven temperature settings. #canada #halloween
Modern day Oct 31 North American Halloween traditions - dressing up or "guising", firecrackers, going door to door for candy, and saying "trick or treat" - all started in Canada around the turn of the 20th century. All of it.
It's not unholy or Satanic. It's Canadian.
#facts #halloween
It's not unholy or Satanic. It's Canadian.
#facts #halloween
October 31, 2025 at 12:05 AM
Modern day Oct 31 North American Halloween traditions - dressing up or "guising", firecrackers, going door to door for candy, and saying "trick or treat" - all started in Canada around the turn of the 20th century. All of it.
It's not unholy or Satanic. It's Canadian.
#facts #halloween
It's not unholy or Satanic. It's Canadian.
#facts #halloween
I feel like there's more room in my life for bouzouki.
October 30, 2025 at 7:06 PM
I feel like there's more room in my life for bouzouki.
Reposted by Morgoth's Lawyer
There is no errand in my life so important that I won’t abandon it the minute I see someone outside with a clipboard.
October 10, 2025 at 8:31 PM
There is no errand in my life so important that I won’t abandon it the minute I see someone outside with a clipboard.
(phone rings) "Is it about my cube?"
what's the stupidest/randomest Simpsons quote that lives in your head rent free? Mine is the urge to say "you said go to bread" every time I am about to head to bed.
October 2, 2025 at 1:25 AM
(phone rings) "Is it about my cube?"
Petitioning the #nyt Spelling Bee to accept "Zendayaland" in today's puzzle because it's not a physical place but rather a state of consciousness and therefore not a proper noun.
September 21, 2025 at 12:44 AM
Petitioning the #nyt Spelling Bee to accept "Zendayaland" in today's puzzle because it's not a physical place but rather a state of consciousness and therefore not a proper noun.
My little robot vacuum, Dirt Reynolds, is working happily downstairs. There's a breeze coming in through the open window beside me, and my cat is asleep in a sunbeam (tummy out). Husband has taken child out for an adventure day. I'm lounging with a cup of tea.
All is well.
All is well.
September 14, 2025 at 4:09 PM
My little robot vacuum, Dirt Reynolds, is working happily downstairs. There's a breeze coming in through the open window beside me, and my cat is asleep in a sunbeam (tummy out). Husband has taken child out for an adventure day. I'm lounging with a cup of tea.
All is well.
All is well.
You know when when you open 1 side of a mirrored 3 way medicine cabinet & you put one mirror at the centre of your face to make that weird mirror reflection face where everything is way too symmetrical & your eyes are too close together?
Because that's exactly what Glen Powell looks like to me.
Because that's exactly what Glen Powell looks like to me.
September 12, 2025 at 2:36 AM
You know when when you open 1 side of a mirrored 3 way medicine cabinet & you put one mirror at the centre of your face to make that weird mirror reflection face where everything is way too symmetrical & your eyes are too close together?
Because that's exactly what Glen Powell looks like to me.
Because that's exactly what Glen Powell looks like to me.
Dear Chapman's ice cream:
When you lure me in with a "butter tart" flavour, you need to be up front about the fact that you're on Team Raisin. Fucking EW.
When you lure me in with a "butter tart" flavour, you need to be up front about the fact that you're on Team Raisin. Fucking EW.
a woman sitting at a table with the word schitts creek on the bottom right
ALT: a woman sitting at a table with the word schitts creek on the bottom right
media.tenor.com
September 12, 2025 at 12:46 AM
Dear Chapman's ice cream:
When you lure me in with a "butter tart" flavour, you need to be up front about the fact that you're on Team Raisin. Fucking EW.
When you lure me in with a "butter tart" flavour, you need to be up front about the fact that you're on Team Raisin. Fucking EW.
No. NO, you shut your whore mouth.
Sad cheese news.
Sad News Alert: Eating Cheese Can Give You Nightmares
nerdist.com
September 5, 2025 at 7:20 PM
No. NO, you shut your whore mouth.
Post a random picture or everything will go bad in September
September 1, 2025 at 12:11 AM
Post a random picture or everything will go bad in September
This is exactly what I needed during these endless horrors. I feel... soothed.
The voiceover is like a bedtime story 🛏️ 🤣
Zingerman's Bakehouse
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Zingerman's Bakehouse
Ann Arbor, Michigan
August 31, 2025 at 2:43 AM
This is exactly what I needed during these endless horrors. I feel... soothed.
Just taught the 5 year old the theme song for Trogdor The Burninator. She is now marching around the house screaming "THATCHED ROOF COTTAGEEEEESSSSS"
August 23, 2025 at 7:05 PM
Just taught the 5 year old the theme song for Trogdor The Burninator. She is now marching around the house screaming "THATCHED ROOF COTTAGEEEEESSSSS"
Hot tip for parents of 5 year olds: "Wow!" is a great response to any of the continuous rapid-fire statements/questions/stream of consciousness that you will be faced with in any given moment. Literally works every time.
August 8, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Hot tip for parents of 5 year olds: "Wow!" is a great response to any of the continuous rapid-fire statements/questions/stream of consciousness that you will be faced with in any given moment. Literally works every time.
Leno wants a cookie.
Hey Jay, when you went off the air, you had ZERO writers who were women on staff, and hardly hired them throughout your very long career. Why shoot for just half the population?
Leno Calls for Late Night to Drop Partisan Politics: ‘Why Shoot for Just Half an Audience?’
“I love political humor, don’t get me wrong,” the veteran comedian told the Ronald Reagan Foundation.
www.thedailybeast.com
July 28, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Leno wants a cookie.
Normal men. Just innocent men.
July 26, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Normal men. Just innocent men.
Reposted by Morgoth's Lawyer
I took Amtrak from San Francisco to Seattle once. It took 28 hours (driving only takes 12 hrs or so, with stops), and it was the most uncomfortable I've ever been on a train (and I've been to India).
But this ad worked on me. 0/10, zero stars, but would definitely recommend Amtrak.
But this ad worked on me. 0/10, zero stars, but would definitely recommend Amtrak.
hell yeah
amtrak’s marketing team gets it
June 23, 2025 at 12:55 AM
I took Amtrak from San Francisco to Seattle once. It took 28 hours (driving only takes 12 hrs or so, with stops), and it was the most uncomfortable I've ever been on a train (and I've been to India).
But this ad worked on me. 0/10, zero stars, but would definitely recommend Amtrak.
But this ad worked on me. 0/10, zero stars, but would definitely recommend Amtrak.
Mine was Tribe dot net, circa 2004. Baby Gen X/Elder millennial.
June 12, 2025 at 5:47 PM
Mine was Tribe dot net, circa 2004. Baby Gen X/Elder millennial.