Raising my rent in LA right now is nasty work

The sense of sorrow and helplessness in the air here in LA tonight is as palpable as the smoke and flames

LA on fire 💔

I think this site needs more bullying

I’ve decided: Gizmo is a girl

I had to be in the hospital over Christmas and my insurance company called to ask me how many stairs I have in my apartment 🫠

One thing about me is that I’ve always wanted to tow with confidence

chocolate chip cookies are easy and so fun to make! start with a high quality all-purpose flour, and a salted butter to give your batter a rich flavor. incorporate your sugar and butter before adding to the flour for a smooth dough. in 1984 i hit a man on an unlit road in kankakee illinois

two dumb bitches telling each other “exactlyyyy”

a movie called nosferatatouille, where a bat sits on draculas head and turns him into a world-renowned pastry chef

Se7en is a Christmas movie because people talk about the Bible and Brad Pitt gets a present at the end.

Y’all this is a $300 Peak Design camera bag. Hot Assassin has good style *and* good aim? 🤭

You should not have to go to work if you are still sleepy

Baby, that’s a potato

Just out here trying to have a bad day