𝑴𝑬𝑳𝑨𝑵𝑪𝑯𝑶𝑳𝒀.
@lavenderliterature.bsky.social
TW: SELF HARM
Nessie | She/They | 18+
Nessie | She/They | 18+
Pinned
( reading a yuri manga. )
August 28, 2025 at 5:01 PM
( reading a yuri manga. )
she's reading yuri.
July 9, 2025 at 7:38 PM
she's reading yuri.
what's a fourth of july.
July 5, 2025 at 2:22 AM
what's a fourth of july.
I've lasted all of pride month without someone thinking I'm attracted to women. . .
July 3, 2025 at 3:17 AM
I've lasted all of pride month without someone thinking I'm attracted to women. . .
A. . . Music competition?
I don't know about singing in front of crowds. . .
I don't know about singing in front of crowds. . .
June 5, 2025 at 2:12 AM
A. . . Music competition?
I don't know about singing in front of crowds. . .
I don't know about singing in front of crowds. . .
" Natsuki. . . "
She would wince at the grab at her arm. A bit of pain at her wrist. . .
Tears began rolling down her face.
" I can't. . . Even if it wasn't me, how can you call me your friend? "
She would wince at the grab at her arm. A bit of pain at her wrist. . .
Tears began rolling down her face.
" I can't. . . Even if it wasn't me, how can you call me your friend? "
"Yuri...I know we're sometime not in good terms...but that doesn't mean I stopped caring. You're still one of my few close friends..."
She tries to grasp again, this time her arm.
"...That time...I don't think it was you...what kind of friend am I if I just let you go alone...?"
She tries to grasp again, this time her arm.
"...That time...I don't think it was you...what kind of friend am I if I just let you go alone...?"
" Natsuki. . . I can't understand how you can even bare to look at me. "
She would tug her hand away, afraid.
She would tug her hand away, afraid.
June 4, 2025 at 9:46 PM
" Natsuki. . . "
She would wince at the grab at her arm. A bit of pain at her wrist. . .
Tears began rolling down her face.
" I can't. . . Even if it wasn't me, how can you call me your friend? "
She would wince at the grab at her arm. A bit of pain at her wrist. . .
Tears began rolling down her face.
" I can't. . . Even if it wasn't me, how can you call me your friend? "
" Natsuki. . . I can't understand how you can even bare to look at me. "
She would tug her hand away, afraid.
She would tug her hand away, afraid.
For a few seconds she could only gaze at her, the fear still evident in her pinkish orbs, but even then...
She reached out and grabbed her hand.
Despite what happened, even with the times they quarrel, the pinkette still cares about her.
"Hey...Hey...no don't...don't say that..."
She reached out and grabbed her hand.
Despite what happened, even with the times they quarrel, the pinkette still cares about her.
"Hey...Hey...no don't...don't say that..."
" You're afraid of me. I'm afraid of me. I did horrible things. . . I shouldn't be here. "
She would tug at her sleeves, clearly on the verge of breaking down.
" I. . . I'm horrible—! "
She would tug at her sleeves, clearly on the verge of breaking down.
" I. . . I'm horrible—! "
June 4, 2025 at 7:47 PM
" Natsuki. . . I can't understand how you can even bare to look at me. "
She would tug her hand away, afraid.
She would tug her hand away, afraid.
" You're afraid of me. I'm afraid of me. I did horrible things. . . I shouldn't be here. "
She would tug at her sleeves, clearly on the verge of breaking down.
" I. . . I'm horrible—! "
She would tug at her sleeves, clearly on the verge of breaking down.
" I. . . I'm horrible—! "
For some seconds she paused, but as soon as the purplette stood up, no matter how much she felt that fear, it made her gaze up to her.
"Huh...? Where are you going...?"
"Huh...? Where are you going...?"
" I. . . I.
I see. "
She started to look. . . terrified. Looking over to Natsuki, trembling. She can't believe she could have done that to her. To her friends.
Yuri stood up.
" I should. . . go. "
I see. "
She started to look. . . terrified. Looking over to Natsuki, trembling. She can't believe she could have done that to her. To her friends.
Yuri stood up.
" I should. . . go. "
June 4, 2025 at 2:13 PM
" You're afraid of me. I'm afraid of me. I did horrible things. . . I shouldn't be here. "
She would tug at her sleeves, clearly on the verge of breaking down.
" I. . . I'm horrible—! "
She would tug at her sleeves, clearly on the verge of breaking down.
" I. . . I'm horrible—! "
" I. . . I.
I see. "
She started to look. . . terrified. Looking over to Natsuki, trembling. She can't believe she could have done that to her. To her friends.
Yuri stood up.
" I should. . . go. "
I see. "
She started to look. . . terrified. Looking over to Natsuki, trembling. She can't believe she could have done that to her. To her friends.
Yuri stood up.
" I should. . . go. "
"I had to...p-punch you to even get away...you lost me completely after that..."
Now her figure was shaking badly. It was that obvious. That explains her hesitation towards the purplette...
Now her figure was shaking badly. It was that obvious. That explains her hesitation towards the purplette...
June 4, 2025 at 11:55 AM
" I. . . I.
I see. "
She started to look. . . terrified. Looking over to Natsuki, trembling. She can't believe she could have done that to her. To her friends.
Yuri stood up.
" I should. . . go. "
I see. "
She started to look. . . terrified. Looking over to Natsuki, trembling. She can't believe she could have done that to her. To her friends.
Yuri stood up.
" I should. . . go. "
" I wasn't myself. . . "
That just confirmed it for her. Yuri began to shake herself. . . It was real, wasn't it? She hurt her friends.
" I've been having nightmares. Where I tried to. . . I would. . .
Natsuki. Please tell me, I didn't hurt anyone. "
That just confirmed it for her. Yuri began to shake herself. . . It was real, wasn't it? She hurt her friends.
" I've been having nightmares. Where I tried to. . . I would. . .
Natsuki. Please tell me, I didn't hurt anyone. "
Panting was heard from the pinkette. As if it was struggling to breathe for a bit. But her breathing stables after a few seconds.
"You...we...I don't know what it was...but you weren't yourself..."
Natsuki was having trouble finding the words to say. Just how bad was it?
"You...we...I don't know what it was...but you weren't yourself..."
Natsuki was having trouble finding the words to say. Just how bad was it?
" I don't. "
Though. . . it seemed like she had a faint idea of what she was talking about.
" What happened, Natsuki? "
Though. . . it seemed like she had a faint idea of what she was talking about.
" What happened, Natsuki? "
June 4, 2025 at 3:37 AM
" I wasn't myself. . . "
That just confirmed it for her. Yuri began to shake herself. . . It was real, wasn't it? She hurt her friends.
" I've been having nightmares. Where I tried to. . . I would. . .
Natsuki. Please tell me, I didn't hurt anyone. "
That just confirmed it for her. Yuri began to shake herself. . . It was real, wasn't it? She hurt her friends.
" I've been having nightmares. Where I tried to. . . I would. . .
Natsuki. Please tell me, I didn't hurt anyone. "
" I don't. "
Though. . . it seemed like she had a faint idea of what she was talking about.
" What happened, Natsuki? "
Though. . . it seemed like she had a faint idea of what she was talking about.
" What happened, Natsuki? "
"...Maybe."
She let out a small murmur. Was Natsuki always this timid? She's usually more brash and fiery.
"Do you...not remember anything at all?"
She let out a small murmur. Was Natsuki always this timid? She's usually more brash and fiery.
"Do you...not remember anything at all?"
" Natsuki. . ? "
She looked a bit more. . . worried.
" /Was/ I punched in the face? "
She looked a bit more. . . worried.
" /Was/ I punched in the face? "
June 4, 2025 at 3:30 AM
" I don't. "
Though. . . it seemed like she had a faint idea of what she was talking about.
" What happened, Natsuki? "
Though. . . it seemed like she had a faint idea of what she was talking about.
" What happened, Natsuki? "
" Natsuki. . ? "
She looked a bit more. . . worried.
" /Was/ I punched in the face? "
She looked a bit more. . . worried.
" /Was/ I punched in the face? "
That made the girl fall in silence. The beanie she was wearing on her head was pulled down, covering the top of her face instead.
"....."
Subtle hints of shivering could be seen from her.
"....."
Subtle hints of shivering could be seen from her.
" A bruise. . ? What, was I punched in the face? "
Yuri just let out a chuckle as she looked over.
Yuri just let out a chuckle as she looked over.
June 4, 2025 at 3:26 AM
" Natsuki. . ? "
She looked a bit more. . . worried.
" /Was/ I punched in the face? "
She looked a bit more. . . worried.
" /Was/ I punched in the face? "
" A bruise. . ? What, was I punched in the face? "
Yuri just let out a chuckle as she looked over.
Yuri just let out a chuckle as she looked over.
"It doesn't hurt right now? Nothing like a bruise?"
The question felt vague, what was the pinkette even trying to convey here?
"No it...it doesn't..."
She's completely abandoned drinking her mug, just stirring endlessly with her spoon to distract herself.
The question felt vague, what was the pinkette even trying to convey here?
"No it...it doesn't..."
She's completely abandoned drinking her mug, just stirring endlessly with her spoon to distract herself.
" Does my face. . . hurt?
Sometimes, but not normally. "
Yuri took a sip from her coffee, raising a brow to her question.
" Does yours? "
Sometimes, but not normally. "
Yuri took a sip from her coffee, raising a brow to her question.
" Does yours? "
June 4, 2025 at 3:21 AM
" A bruise. . ? What, was I punched in the face? "
Yuri just let out a chuckle as she looked over.
Yuri just let out a chuckle as she looked over.
" Does my face. . . hurt?
Sometimes, but not normally. "
Yuri took a sip from her coffee, raising a brow to her question.
" Does yours? "
Sometimes, but not normally. "
Yuri took a sip from her coffee, raising a brow to her question.
" Does yours? "
There was complete silence from her, seconds passes to almost minutes, but eventually she breaks the silence between them.
"Does...your face...hurt?"
Even now, she avoids directly facing Yuri.
"Does...your face...hurt?"
Even now, she avoids directly facing Yuri.
" Tell me what you need to say. "
Yuri began to cross her arms, looking toward the pinkette.
" I don't want you to be uncomfortable if I'm here, or at all. "
Yuri began to cross her arms, looking toward the pinkette.
" I don't want you to be uncomfortable if I'm here, or at all. "
June 4, 2025 at 3:17 AM
" Does my face. . . hurt?
Sometimes, but not normally. "
Yuri took a sip from her coffee, raising a brow to her question.
" Does yours? "
Sometimes, but not normally. "
Yuri took a sip from her coffee, raising a brow to her question.
" Does yours? "
Looking in the mirror. . .
" Girls can't love girls, right? "
" Girls can't love girls, right? "
June 4, 2025 at 3:16 AM
Looking in the mirror. . .
" Girls can't love girls, right? "
" Girls can't love girls, right? "
" Of course. "
A nod.
A nod.
That's good, she still doesn't want to be alone.
"...Just a few more minutes, okay?.."
"...Just a few more minutes, okay?.."
She doesn't mind at all.
June 4, 2025 at 3:14 AM
" Of course. "
A nod.
A nod.
" Tell me what you need to say. "
Yuri began to cross her arms, looking toward the pinkette.
" I don't want you to be uncomfortable if I'm here, or at all. "
Yuri began to cross her arms, looking toward the pinkette.
" I don't want you to be uncomfortable if I'm here, or at all. "
She doesn't seem to believe her words, it caused the much shorter girl to shrink even further into her seat.
She wasn't even drinking her mug anymore.
"....."
Her gaze shifted away from her. Perhaps that defense is completely broken now.
"What...do you want me to say...?"
She wasn't even drinking her mug anymore.
"....."
Her gaze shifted away from her. Perhaps that defense is completely broken now.
"What...do you want me to say...?"
" Well. . . partly the reason I thought it was because of me. . . was that the only reason you began acting this way is when I waved to you. "
A sigh.
" So it's either me, or you have a problem you need to get off your chest. "
A sigh.
" So it's either me, or you have a problem you need to get off your chest. "
June 4, 2025 at 3:14 AM
" Tell me what you need to say. "
Yuri began to cross her arms, looking toward the pinkette.
" I don't want you to be uncomfortable if I'm here, or at all. "
Yuri began to cross her arms, looking toward the pinkette.
" I don't want you to be uncomfortable if I'm here, or at all. "
She doesn't mind at all.
"Ehe..."
She was just going to be here for a while longer..
She was just going to be here for a while longer..
" As would I for you. "
Yuri just nodded, staring to the other.
Yuri just nodded, staring to the other.
June 4, 2025 at 3:11 AM
She doesn't mind at all.
" Well. . . partly the reason I thought it was because of me. . . was that the only reason you began acting this way is when I waved to you. "
A sigh.
" So it's either me, or you have a problem you need to get off your chest. "
A sigh.
" So it's either me, or you have a problem you need to get off your chest. "
"W-What? It is c-cold!"
It was like her defense was cracking but she continues to hold it up. It only makes one wonder what it really is.
It was like her defense was cracking but she continues to hold it up. It only makes one wonder what it really is.
" Natsuki. Be honest with me. "
She saw right through that. . . For someone bad with social cues, she was surprisingly sharp.
A quick sip of her coffee.
She saw right through that. . . For someone bad with social cues, she was surprisingly sharp.
A quick sip of her coffee.
June 4, 2025 at 3:03 AM
" Well. . . partly the reason I thought it was because of me. . . was that the only reason you began acting this way is when I waved to you. "
A sigh.
" So it's either me, or you have a problem you need to get off your chest. "
A sigh.
" So it's either me, or you have a problem you need to get off your chest. "
" As would I for you. "
Yuri just nodded, staring to the other.
Yuri just nodded, staring to the other.
Staring up at the purplette's face, Sayori would nod.
"You're right!....I'd gladly listen whenever you're ready!.."
"You're right!....I'd gladly listen whenever you're ready!.."
" I'm never comfortable with myself. But it needs to be done, you know? "
A grin.
A grin.
June 4, 2025 at 3:02 AM
" As would I for you. "
Yuri just nodded, staring to the other.
Yuri just nodded, staring to the other.
" Natsuki. Be honest with me. "
She saw right through that. . . For someone bad with social cues, she was surprisingly sharp.
A quick sip of her coffee.
She saw right through that. . . For someone bad with social cues, she was surprisingly sharp.
A quick sip of her coffee.
"Yeah...you got nothing to worry about."
As so she says yet that odd air is lingering around the short pinkette.
"I-It's surprisingly cold. The hot drink helps in a way....ehehe...he..."
She is wearing thick layered clothing, but is that really the true reason?
As so she says yet that odd air is lingering around the short pinkette.
"I-It's surprisingly cold. The hot drink helps in a way....ehehe...he..."
She is wearing thick layered clothing, but is that really the true reason?
" Oh. That's actually. . . incredibly comforting to hear!
I was so worried all this time. "
There's a rare smile on Yuri's face. A wide grin, even!
" But. . . I have to ask. What has you so shaken up? "
I was so worried all this time. "
There's a rare smile on Yuri's face. A wide grin, even!
" But. . . I have to ask. What has you so shaken up? "
June 4, 2025 at 2:45 AM
" Natsuki. Be honest with me. "
She saw right through that. . . For someone bad with social cues, she was surprisingly sharp.
A quick sip of her coffee.
She saw right through that. . . For someone bad with social cues, she was surprisingly sharp.
A quick sip of her coffee.
" I'm never comfortable with myself. But it needs to be done, you know? "
A grin.
A grin.
"...Only if you're comfortable.."
Sayori stares up at the purplette, already feeling way better than she'd felt before.
Sayori stares up at the purplette, already feeling way better than she'd felt before.
" Thank you.
And if you'd like. . . I could tell you my own faults. "
She's running her hands through her hair.
And if you'd like. . . I could tell you my own faults. "
She's running her hands through her hair.
June 4, 2025 at 2:44 AM
" I'm never comfortable with myself. But it needs to be done, you know? "
A grin.
A grin.
" Thank you.
And if you'd like. . . I could tell you my own faults. "
She's running her hands through her hair.
And if you'd like. . . I could tell you my own faults. "
She's running her hands through her hair.
"I know...I trust you..."
....Sayori turns her gaze to look at Yuri.
"Once I'm ready, I'll tell you..."
....Sayori turns her gaze to look at Yuri.
"Once I'm ready, I'll tell you..."
" Of course, Sayori. "
The girl would let out a laugh.
" You know. . . you can tell me what's wrong when you're ready. "
The girl would let out a laugh.
" You know. . . you can tell me what's wrong when you're ready. "
June 4, 2025 at 2:40 AM
" Thank you.
And if you'd like. . . I could tell you my own faults. "
She's running her hands through her hair.
And if you'd like. . . I could tell you my own faults. "
She's running her hands through her hair.
" Oh. That's actually. . . incredibly comforting to hear!
I was so worried all this time. "
There's a rare smile on Yuri's face. A wide grin, even!
" But. . . I have to ask. What has you so shaken up? "
I was so worried all this time. "
There's a rare smile on Yuri's face. A wide grin, even!
" But. . . I have to ask. What has you so shaken up? "
"I mean...th-there are times we fight! That's normal for friends...It's n-not that bad!"
Yeah no, the pinkette usually doesn't get shaken up like this, yet here she is. Even more shy than Yuri ever was.
"D-don't worry about it okay? I don't hate you at all...ahaha..."
Yeah no, the pinkette usually doesn't get shaken up like this, yet here she is. Even more shy than Yuri ever was.
"D-don't worry about it okay? I don't hate you at all...ahaha..."
" Well, we never did get along. And you're so shy right now. . .
Have I read the situation wrong? "
Yuri would place her hands over her chest, worried.
Have I read the situation wrong? "
Yuri would place her hands over her chest, worried.
June 4, 2025 at 2:39 AM
" Oh. That's actually. . . incredibly comforting to hear!
I was so worried all this time. "
There's a rare smile on Yuri's face. A wide grin, even!
" But. . . I have to ask. What has you so shaken up? "
I was so worried all this time. "
There's a rare smile on Yuri's face. A wide grin, even!
" But. . . I have to ask. What has you so shaken up? "