Firstname Lastname
@kosherguacamole.bsky.social
if you have nothing nice to say, come sit by me | 🇲🇽 ✡️ | i lost on jeopardy
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November 20, 2025 at 12:27 PM
There are few things that make me violently American, but you can pry my paper towels from my cold, dead hands
November 15, 2025 at 3:15 PM
There are few things that make me violently American, but you can pry my paper towels from my cold, dead hands
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Once again, it's time for an NBA ON PEACOCK MONDAY. Bow to your multicolored bird overlords.
November 10, 2025 at 11:57 PM
Once again, it's time for an NBA ON PEACOCK MONDAY. Bow to your multicolored bird overlords.
I regret to inform everyone that making your bed in the morning actually feels pretty good. Sorry for this news
October 30, 2025 at 11:47 AM
I regret to inform everyone that making your bed in the morning actually feels pretty good. Sorry for this news
I resent Hollywood for trying to convince me that Glenn Powell should be a thing
October 26, 2025 at 12:42 PM
I resent Hollywood for trying to convince me that Glenn Powell should be a thing
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can’t take this one away from him though
October 23, 2025 at 12:41 PM
can’t take this one away from him though
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Reposted by Firstname Lastname
you have a right to be angry
June 28, 2025 at 6:32 PM
you have a right to be angry
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If you can't handle me at my, you don't deserve me at my
September 25, 2025 at 2:54 PM
If you can't handle me at my, you don't deserve me at my
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> It is 2025 BC. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis
> It is 2025 AD. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis
> It is 2025 AD. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis
October 11, 2025 at 5:32 PM
> It is 2025 BC. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis
> It is 2025 AD. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis
> It is 2025 AD. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis
Can you imagine if we had an actual opposition party
October 11, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Can you imagine if we had an actual opposition party
"YOU'LL NEVER BE A WOMAN, IT'S JUST SCIENCE" says guy who ate horse dewormer to prevent COVID
September 21, 2025 at 1:40 PM
"YOU'LL NEVER BE A WOMAN, IT'S JUST SCIENCE" says guy who ate horse dewormer to prevent COVID
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Watching prominent commenters followed by dozens of people I know say "it's over" because Jimmy Kimmel got suspended...like, they actually killed Medgar Evers, in defense of a fascist system that had been in place for decades. Imagine social media that day! Read history and have some self-respect.
September 18, 2025 at 1:41 PM
Watching prominent commenters followed by dozens of people I know say "it's over" because Jimmy Kimmel got suspended...like, they actually killed Medgar Evers, in defense of a fascist system that had been in place for decades. Imagine social media that day! Read history and have some self-respect.
I had no idea TLC was really talking about birds, although I have to take exception to some of their factual assertions
September 14, 2025 at 8:59 PM
I had no idea TLC was really talking about birds, although I have to take exception to some of their factual assertions
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once read a post where the author repeatedly referred to her baby as "toehead" instead of "tow-headed" and all I could think was
September 6, 2025 at 7:44 PM
once read a post where the author repeatedly referred to her baby as "toehead" instead of "tow-headed" and all I could think was
When my baby is crying because the pacifier he took out of his mouth is not in his mouth
August 3, 2025 at 2:26 PM
When my baby is crying because the pacifier he took out of his mouth is not in his mouth
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“Whether one really loves God can be determined by the love borne toward others.”
Rabbi Levi Yitzhak of Berditchev
Rabbi Levi Yitzhak of Berditchev
July 21, 2025 at 6:10 PM
“Whether one really loves God can be determined by the love borne toward others.”
Rabbi Levi Yitzhak of Berditchev
Rabbi Levi Yitzhak of Berditchev
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there are so many great things about generative AI! here are some of my favorites <3
July 13, 2025 at 10:17 PM
there are so many great things about generative AI! here are some of my favorites <3
had a dream that included the line "she killed the sandwich because she decided to fight God"
July 9, 2025 at 11:52 AM
had a dream that included the line "she killed the sandwich because she decided to fight God"
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In 1994, crime was down across Texas but George Bush's gubernatorial campaign (engineered by Karl Rove) defeated incumbent Ann Richards in part by running ads that asked "but do you FEEL safe?"
Anyway,
Anyway,
“I’m explicitly admitting there is no threat and it’s an absurd notion but because a religious group is delusional about the fake threat 400k of my neighbors are assholes”
I thought this was a perfect shitpost but he’s serious
I thought this was a perfect shitpost but he’s serious
June 28, 2025 at 3:05 AM
In 1994, crime was down across Texas but George Bush's gubernatorial campaign (engineered by Karl Rove) defeated incumbent Ann Richards in part by running ads that asked "but do you FEEL safe?"
Anyway,
Anyway,
Being a parent is awesome because you can make your baby dance to a song called "Have You Checked Your Butthole" and they're SO HAPPY doing it
June 21, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Being a parent is awesome because you can make your baby dance to a song called "Have You Checked Your Butthole" and they're SO HAPPY doing it
If you're not watching the Finals because Indy and OKC are "small markets", you're missing one of the best playoff series of all time
June 14, 2025 at 3:19 AM
If you're not watching the Finals because Indy and OKC are "small markets", you're missing one of the best playoff series of all time