Kimploded
@kimploded.bsky.social
I am the real Squirrel Girl. Like, for real.
Shout out to my bird who wolf whistled after I burped
July 25, 2025 at 1:12 PM
Shout out to my bird who wolf whistled after I burped
I HAVE DELARED A CEASEFIRE BETWEEN YOUR MOM AND MY HOUSE
June 25, 2025 at 2:14 AM
I HAVE DELARED A CEASEFIRE BETWEEN YOUR MOM AND MY HOUSE
Family is off the boat from Scotland, big family clan still has a castle there, I've never been and I'm stuck in Florida. I think this actually DOES justify me throwing haggis at traffic, officer.
June 19, 2025 at 12:59 AM
Family is off the boat from Scotland, big family clan still has a castle there, I've never been and I'm stuck in Florida. I think this actually DOES justify me throwing haggis at traffic, officer.
According to my mammogram, I have "dense breasts". Fellas.
June 11, 2025 at 7:57 PM
According to my mammogram, I have "dense breasts". Fellas.
Saw this today. Relatable.
May 25, 2025 at 12:36 AM
Saw this today. Relatable.
Just because you know things about me doesn't mean you know me. Know what I mean?
May 14, 2025 at 8:04 PM
Just because you know things about me doesn't mean you know me. Know what I mean?
Reposted by Kimploded
I can't believe we have a Pope from Illinois. People from Chicago usually hate the Cardinals.
May 8, 2025 at 5:51 PM
I can't believe we have a Pope from Illinois. People from Chicago usually hate the Cardinals.
How did the new Pope pass up the opportunity to say he's on a mission from God?!
May 8, 2025 at 10:25 PM
How did the new Pope pass up the opportunity to say he's on a mission from God?!
I can't hear the word "symbolism" without hearing it like Willem Dafoe says it in The Boondock Saints.
May 1, 2025 at 10:16 PM
I can't hear the word "symbolism" without hearing it like Willem Dafoe says it in The Boondock Saints.
"Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think. The years go by as quickly as you wink, enjoy yourself. It's later than you think."
Thinking about Terry this morning.
Thinking about Terry this morning.
April 29, 2025 at 1:12 PM
"Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think. The years go by as quickly as you wink, enjoy yourself. It's later than you think."
Thinking about Terry this morning.
Thinking about Terry this morning.
I've been dubbed the most patient person in the world, as well as a Disney princess. Well I'm getting a little impatient at these woodland creatures not helping me with this goddamn laundry...
April 28, 2025 at 6:42 PM
I've been dubbed the most patient person in the world, as well as a Disney princess. Well I'm getting a little impatient at these woodland creatures not helping me with this goddamn laundry...
Anyone else just barely hanging on
January 26, 2025 at 6:45 PM
Anyone else just barely hanging on
You're not a cat owner until you've given your couch a haircut.
January 25, 2025 at 7:53 PM
You're not a cat owner until you've given your couch a haircut.
Remember when he said if he was elected he would be the last elected president? I remember. Pepperidge Farm remembers.
January 21, 2025 at 12:38 PM
Remember when he said if he was elected he would be the last elected president? I remember. Pepperidge Farm remembers.
Woman wants Sour Patch Kids. Woman eats Sour Patch Kids. Woman feels incredibly nauseous from the Sour Patch Kids. Woman repeats the cycle until she dies. Sour Patch Kids inherit the earth.
January 8, 2025 at 6:43 PM
Woman wants Sour Patch Kids. Woman eats Sour Patch Kids. Woman feels incredibly nauseous from the Sour Patch Kids. Woman repeats the cycle until she dies. Sour Patch Kids inherit the earth.
Gonna open a store that's medical marinara. Here are your breadsticks and marinara sauce that's homemade by an older Italian woman, god speed. That shit will cure all that ails you.
Want a gluten free strain? We got you. Cheese? Mozzarella, vegan, the world is your curd. Go get catatonic my friend.
Want a gluten free strain? We got you. Cheese? Mozzarella, vegan, the world is your curd. Go get catatonic my friend.
January 3, 2025 at 8:48 PM
Gonna open a store that's medical marinara. Here are your breadsticks and marinara sauce that's homemade by an older Italian woman, god speed. That shit will cure all that ails you.
Want a gluten free strain? We got you. Cheese? Mozzarella, vegan, the world is your curd. Go get catatonic my friend.
Want a gluten free strain? We got you. Cheese? Mozzarella, vegan, the world is your curd. Go get catatonic my friend.
Elliot Easton's solos on Just What I Needed are just... *chef's kiss* I wish he was more in the conversations of great guitar players.
December 28, 2024 at 8:24 PM
Elliot Easton's solos on Just What I Needed are just... *chef's kiss* I wish he was more in the conversations of great guitar players.
Found out the hard way that Scotch tape is false advertising.
December 25, 2024 at 9:49 PM
Found out the hard way that Scotch tape is false advertising.
I haven't been here since Steve Albini passed because this was his place for me. The reply guys and hyperbole posters have taken over Threads and I just now see that some of my favorite people are here. Please be sane 💜
December 25, 2024 at 3:03 AM
I haven't been here since Steve Albini passed because this was his place for me. The reply guys and hyperbole posters have taken over Threads and I just now see that some of my favorite people are here. Please be sane 💜
Threads' insanity had me forget about you for a minute, Bluesky. I still love your smaller population peacefulness, though. (Not sarcasm)
December 30, 2023 at 9:05 PM
Threads' insanity had me forget about you for a minute, Bluesky. I still love your smaller population peacefulness, though. (Not sarcasm)
Just saw Book of Mormon. Take out the religion and you've basically got midwesterners.
December 5, 2023 at 4:56 AM
Just saw Book of Mormon. Take out the religion and you've basically got midwesterners.
Nothing like the AP Gov. teacher hitting on you at the parent teacher conference 😑
November 30, 2023 at 10:47 PM
Nothing like the AP Gov. teacher hitting on you at the parent teacher conference 😑
Reposted by Kimploded
I normally don’t believe in god but Carter outlived Kissinger so praise be
November 30, 2023 at 2:27 AM
I normally don’t believe in god but Carter outlived Kissinger so praise be
He was only 100 what a tragedy this is! Anyway I had the best coffee today.
November 30, 2023 at 2:02 AM
He was only 100 what a tragedy this is! Anyway I had the best coffee today.