Getting caught having a fake argument is only embarrassing if you lose

I'm a frequent flyer at my local Wendy's and today, they gave me a fruit cup with my order. Given that I did not order a fruit cup, they're either calling me fat or a homosexual.

Had a dream I was voguing my ass off and woke up sore

I hope the announcement is a hologram like Tupac

RURAL IS A ONE SYLLABLE WORD IDGAF

If you're gonna put me on hold, you could at least use the Cisco hold music.

Habitica should introduce a feature where instead of my avatar taking damage, someone comes in and slaps me irl when I fuck up.

Exacly 14 years apart and folks have learned fuck all about snow