Crassberry 🍗 Jellyneck
@crassjerkneck.bsky.social
38, he/him, dumb as hell.
Taking anything I say here seriously makes a fool out of you, not me.
Chicago
Taking anything I say here seriously makes a fool out of you, not me.
Chicago
Pinned
If you’re cold, they’re cold — tuck them in!
This is fun—I’m not even a Reply Guy, I’m a LurkerLiker.
November 28, 2025 at 4:12 PM
This is fun—I’m not even a Reply Guy, I’m a LurkerLiker.
If you don’t follow my friend the professor, you’re missing out on quality Simpsons/Futurama jokes perfectly meeting the moment. The guy plays the game here because he loves it. A true Poster dressed in Reply Guy. Thankful for you, boss. And thank you!
Another long time mutual is @crassjerkneck.bsky.social and the ability to have these types of relationships is something I’m thankful for. Love the mix of Chicago stuff and sports and Star Trek and what not that we’ve talked about over the years. Hoping it continues and congrats apparently duderiño.
November 28, 2025 at 3:48 PM
If you don’t follow my friend the professor, you’re missing out on quality Simpsons/Futurama jokes perfectly meeting the moment. The guy plays the game here because he loves it. A true Poster dressed in Reply Guy. Thankful for you, boss. And thank you!
Hosted dinner today and also asked a very important question and got a really solid answer
November 28, 2025 at 12:47 AM
Hosted dinner today and also asked a very important question and got a really solid answer
Reposted by Crassberry 🍗 Jellyneck
How we used to have to buy weed
December 9, 2023 at 5:49 PM
How we used to have to buy weed
Reposted by Crassberry 🍗 Jellyneck
You know what food I hate? Your personal favourite food. Inedible garbage.
November 25, 2025 at 9:48 PM
You know what food I hate? Your personal favourite food. Inedible garbage.
Welcome back, William Carlos Williams
If you write your posts
Like this
For no discernable reason
I am going to hit you
With my car
Like this
For no discernable reason
I am going to hit you
With my car
November 25, 2025 at 8:18 PM
Welcome back, William Carlos Williams
The economy doing everything it can to keep the AI bubble held together until Q1 like me two blocks from home holding in my morning movement as I return from my constitutional
November 25, 2025 at 7:21 PM
The economy doing everything it can to keep the AI bubble held together until Q1 like me two blocks from home holding in my morning movement as I return from my constitutional
Me explaining the difference between laughing and saying “lol” out loud to all of my friends’ kids
November 25, 2025 at 6:42 PM
Me explaining the difference between laughing and saying “lol” out loud to all of my friends’ kids
Well I started Enterprise and the vibes are Horny
November 25, 2025 at 1:30 AM
Well I started Enterprise and the vibes are Horny
Reposted by Crassberry 🍗 Jellyneck
If I organized a meet-up for radical trekkies to discuss radical Star Trek, why we love it, and how we want to engage with the struggles of our real-world moment, here, in Chicago, how many people would show up?
November 24, 2025 at 2:41 AM
If I organized a meet-up for radical trekkies to discuss radical Star Trek, why we love it, and how we want to engage with the struggles of our real-world moment, here, in Chicago, how many people would show up?
Babe wake up new common sense with Dan Carlin just dropped
November 24, 2025 at 1:44 PM
Babe wake up new common sense with Dan Carlin just dropped
Auspicious if you like cold & wet winters! (I do we need one)
November 23, 2025 at 7:30 PM
Auspicious if you like cold & wet winters! (I do we need one)
Reposted by Crassberry 🍗 Jellyneck
Current* conditions near Chicago, IL:
November 23, 2025 at 4:06 PM
Current* conditions near Chicago, IL:
“Other networks are running this. This is /news/.”
Actual pull quote from The Morning Show
Actual pull quote from The Morning Show
November 22, 2025 at 1:08 AM
“Other networks are running this. This is /news/.”
Actual pull quote from The Morning Show
Actual pull quote from The Morning Show
Oh! Teacher! Pick me! I know the answer! I know what to do!
After the latest fire at a NW Side homeless encampment, neighbors say the city needs new policies. blockclubchi.co/49vYHmS
November 20, 2025 at 10:19 PM
Oh! Teacher! Pick me! I know the answer! I know what to do!
Janeway when she sees Borg but they haven’t seen Voyager yet:
The cube’s about to hit warp speed
November 20, 2025 at 10:17 PM
Janeway when she sees Borg but they haven’t seen Voyager yet:
MFW the 3rd party security vendor babysitting the L station is masked, wearing a tactical vest, armed, and has a barely-trained muzzled German Shepherd barking at everyone
November 20, 2025 at 9:26 PM
MFW the 3rd party security vendor babysitting the L station is masked, wearing a tactical vest, armed, and has a barely-trained muzzled German Shepherd barking at everyone
Nationalize Kroger, you say?
November 20, 2025 at 3:43 AM
Nationalize Kroger, you say?
Reposted by Crassberry 🍗 Jellyneck
right now is a good time of year to bring your bikes in for a tune up that I will be able to spend 3-4x longer on than in April-August
November 19, 2025 at 7:36 PM
right now is a good time of year to bring your bikes in for a tune up that I will be able to spend 3-4x longer on than in April-August
I know it’s been done to death but LinkedIn is the most cursed place
November 19, 2025 at 5:24 PM
I know it’s been done to death but LinkedIn is the most cursed place
No order of the internet takes itself as seriously as r/chicagofood
November 19, 2025 at 6:03 AM
No order of the internet takes itself as seriously as r/chicagofood
Everyone has a karaoke personality and mine is Diva 💅
November 19, 2025 at 4:26 AM
Everyone has a karaoke personality and mine is Diva 💅
Food, housing, education and healthcare should all be free and of the highest quality. Clean water & air, electricity, and internet should be seen as basic human needs and are also free. End the commodification of necessities.
"my least woke opinion is---"
That's enough. We've had enough people indulging in the "thrill of a little conservatism", as a treat. Of considering reactionary thought to be a salacious and taboo in a world descending into reactionary mania.
Give me your MOST woke opinions. We're bringing it back.
That's enough. We've had enough people indulging in the "thrill of a little conservatism", as a treat. Of considering reactionary thought to be a salacious and taboo in a world descending into reactionary mania.
Give me your MOST woke opinions. We're bringing it back.
November 18, 2025 at 8:38 PM
Food, housing, education and healthcare should all be free and of the highest quality. Clean water & air, electricity, and internet should be seen as basic human needs and are also free. End the commodification of necessities.
Reposted by Crassberry 🍗 Jellyneck
I’m against IQ calipers pseudoscience bullshit except for people who put their tv above their fireplace, if you do that you should be required to have a handler
November 15, 2025 at 1:42 AM
I’m against IQ calipers pseudoscience bullshit except for people who put their tv above their fireplace, if you do that you should be required to have a handler