A Shining Wit
@caffeine748.bsky.social
I write terrible dad jokes. Not about terrible dads, though.
My pot addiction is causing issues between me and my wife.
She says she is fed up of snooker and wants to watch her favourite TV shows instead.
#LunchPun
She says she is fed up of snooker and wants to watch her favourite TV shows instead.
#LunchPun
November 13, 2025 at 11:59 AM
My pot addiction is causing issues between me and my wife.
She says she is fed up of snooker and wants to watch her favourite TV shows instead.
#LunchPun
She says she is fed up of snooker and wants to watch her favourite TV shows instead.
#LunchPun
November 11, 2025 at 12:01 PM
November 10, 2025 at 11:59 AM
I've recently been having trubble smelling my works correctly.
Last week the doctor said I had irritable vowel syndrome.
This week she is says i'm inconsonant.
#LunchPun
Last week the doctor said I had irritable vowel syndrome.
This week she is says i'm inconsonant.
#LunchPun
November 6, 2025 at 11:59 AM
I've recently been having trubble smelling my works correctly.
Last week the doctor said I had irritable vowel syndrome.
This week she is says i'm inconsonant.
#LunchPun
Last week the doctor said I had irritable vowel syndrome.
This week she is says i'm inconsonant.
#LunchPun
It was chaos at the zoo today.
All you could hear for nearly an hour was "THERE'S NO BAMBOO, I HAVE A SMALL CHILD AND THERE IS NO BAMBOO!"
Panda moany mum.
#LunchPun
All you could hear for nearly an hour was "THERE'S NO BAMBOO, I HAVE A SMALL CHILD AND THERE IS NO BAMBOO!"
Panda moany mum.
#LunchPun
November 5, 2025 at 12:02 PM
It was chaos at the zoo today.
All you could hear for nearly an hour was "THERE'S NO BAMBOO, I HAVE A SMALL CHILD AND THERE IS NO BAMBOO!"
Panda moany mum.
#LunchPun
All you could hear for nearly an hour was "THERE'S NO BAMBOO, I HAVE A SMALL CHILD AND THERE IS NO BAMBOO!"
Panda moany mum.
#LunchPun
Got called in to work today on my day off because apparently there was a hacker in the building and i needed to find them.
Ended up taking part in a ritual war dance.
#LunchPun
Ended up taking part in a ritual war dance.
#LunchPun
November 4, 2025 at 11:58 AM
Got called in to work today on my day off because apparently there was a hacker in the building and i needed to find them.
Ended up taking part in a ritual war dance.
#LunchPun
Ended up taking part in a ritual war dance.
#LunchPun
-"That new convenience shop in Wrexham high street started trading today"
-"Evans' opened?"
-"Actually it was surprisingly dry for Wales"
#LunchPun
-"Evans' opened?"
-"Actually it was surprisingly dry for Wales"
#LunchPun
November 3, 2025 at 12:00 PM
-"That new convenience shop in Wrexham high street started trading today"
-"Evans' opened?"
-"Actually it was surprisingly dry for Wales"
#LunchPun
-"Evans' opened?"
-"Actually it was surprisingly dry for Wales"
#LunchPun
Investigations are ongoing into a new top secret North Korean military project codenamed LOOK SQUIRREL.
Multiple nations are concerned about a new weapon of mass distraction.
#LunchPun
Multiple nations are concerned about a new weapon of mass distraction.
#LunchPun
October 31, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Investigations are ongoing into a new top secret North Korean military project codenamed LOOK SQUIRREL.
Multiple nations are concerned about a new weapon of mass distraction.
#LunchPun
Multiple nations are concerned about a new weapon of mass distraction.
#LunchPun
October 30, 2025 at 11:58 AM
My dad used to listen exclusively to classical music whilst sitting in his recliner.
Times have changed, he discovered heavy metal and now he has a rocking chair.
#LunchPun
Times have changed, he discovered heavy metal and now he has a rocking chair.
#LunchPun
October 29, 2025 at 12:02 PM
My dad used to listen exclusively to classical music whilst sitting in his recliner.
Times have changed, he discovered heavy metal and now he has a rocking chair.
#LunchPun
Times have changed, he discovered heavy metal and now he has a rocking chair.
#LunchPun
October 27, 2025 at 11:58 AM
-"I've just bought the best male reindeer available from a local breeder."
-"Prize stag?"
-"Oh you don't want to know how much i spent"
#LunchPun
-"Prize stag?"
-"Oh you don't want to know how much i spent"
#LunchPun
October 22, 2025 at 11:00 AM
-"I've just bought the best male reindeer available from a local breeder."
-"Prize stag?"
-"Oh you don't want to know how much i spent"
#LunchPun
-"Prize stag?"
-"Oh you don't want to know how much i spent"
#LunchPun
October 21, 2025 at 11:01 AM
October 20, 2025 at 10:59 AM
I've got half a pound of rice to trade for a nice shiny balloon. I can choose a balloon that looks like either: an old man that looks like my grandad; a phantom or some rodent looking creature.
So... Pop, Ghost or Weasel?
#LunchPun
So... Pop, Ghost or Weasel?
#LunchPun
October 14, 2025 at 11:02 AM
I've got half a pound of rice to trade for a nice shiny balloon. I can choose a balloon that looks like either: an old man that looks like my grandad; a phantom or some rodent looking creature.
So... Pop, Ghost or Weasel?
#LunchPun
So... Pop, Ghost or Weasel?
#LunchPun
October 13, 2025 at 10:59 AM