Brent
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brenta.bsky.social
Brent
@brenta.bsky.social
Seizing the means of shitposting. Not suitable for human consumption.
You know your old when they start marketing dick pills to your generation.
August 9, 2023 at 1:25 AM
Seeing lots of videos on Twitter of people who worked at the same company 30+ years having their retirement fund messed with by their employer.

I'd make international news if that shit happened to me.
July 31, 2023 at 1:37 PM
Monty Python's ministry of silly cums
Monty Python's flying Cum
Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Cum
July 30, 2023 at 12:51 AM
I hate small talk with every fiber of my being and I wish I didn't, because I actually agree with this. Talking to people in your community, even if it's about nothing, is part of building community.
the internet is wrong about smalltalk, smalltalk is great. shooting the shit with people at the corner store or your neighbors, or people on the street, about shit that absolutely doesn't matter? mild jokes about the weather or how you'd complain but no one would listen anyway? this is praxis.
July 26, 2023 at 12:52 PM
Any person even remotely involved in making drying towels that aren't absorbant will go straight to the gulag under my dictatorship.
July 25, 2023 at 12:08 PM
We making egg fried rice tomorrow.
July 25, 2023 at 12:05 AM
Sexual mutual aid sounds so rigid and icky and I don't agree with it because it's 99% incels trying to fuck out of their league.

That aside, single people (and non-monogamous people, I suppose) should all be fucking a lot - A LOT. Finding someone who's down with you and smashing on the reg is good.
July 24, 2023 at 11:17 PM
I really gotta take some time to find all of my Twitter mutuals on here.
July 20, 2023 at 6:12 PM
If they have to stick you more than three times then your bloodwork should be free.
July 20, 2023 at 6:08 PM
Bluesky is truly the reply guys' social media talking bout, "Your reply has been published," all fancy and shit. Fucking right it has. Got me typing with my pinky out and everything.
July 19, 2023 at 1:35 AM
If you mix espresso, some lemon juice, and seltzer it makes this really thick nitrous-style / Guinness-like head. Photo is after about 5 minutes.
July 19, 2023 at 12:28 AM
Why does putting the word "food" after a food make it sound less like actual food.
July 16, 2023 at 2:14 AM
So Nimona was really good, if you got Netflix.
July 14, 2023 at 9:56 PM
Reposted by Brent
My rates are VERY CHEAP! $15 for 500+ words (1pg), or $50 for 2k (4 PCs, or in depth lore of your choosing)!

My online video tutoring is $30/hour (History or ttrpg lessons).

I also do custom NSFW stories (variable rate based on content requested).

My turnaround is also pretty fast. Please share!
July 13, 2023 at 11:31 AM
Sneezed while eating and now I have a chunk of ghost pepper salsa wedged in my sinuses. Soul is leaving my body.
July 13, 2023 at 8:43 PM
If I was God I would turn every flying insect into a honey bee without one sliver of concern for the ecological impact. Mosquitos and flies can die mad.
July 13, 2023 at 8:41 PM
I've never met someone who's wedding song was "Ain't Nothing Bout You" by Brooks & Dunn who's not divorced. In fact, I know someone who's had it be their wedding song more than twice.
July 13, 2023 at 8:36 PM
Reposted by Brent
I’m here to make friends and farm engagement … and I’m extremely unlikable
July 12, 2023 at 2:59 PM
If this is all a simulation, whoever developed spinning spaghetti onto a fork is so silly pilled.
July 12, 2023 at 12:12 AM
In my "eat a smaller pregame sandwich while making the actual sandwich" era
July 11, 2023 at 6:01 AM
They took the annoying pop-ups and blaringly loud sound out of viruses and put them right on the websites instead.
July 10, 2023 at 5:26 PM
The only thing the generation that popularized the reverse mortgage is going to leave behind is debt lmao
“Millennials and Gen Z will just inherit family money when their parents die and then they’ll be fine.”

Oh is THAT SO
In all honesty: half-decent LLMs are absolutely going to be used to scam elderly people on a scale we’ve never seen before, and I have almost zero faith that regulators will notice in time.
July 10, 2023 at 3:12 PM
You: Let me get a 6 inch Italian Sub.
Me walking out the back like.
July 10, 2023 at 12:02 PM
Reposted by Brent
banned from gardening forum for saying "it was me" every time someone posted and said "help, something is eating my tomatoes"
July 9, 2023 at 9:39 PM