Ben Schultz
@ben.theskinnyonbenny.com
Old white male hetero cisgender pickup-truck-driving baseball-cap-wearing liberal. Sailing, LSU, Saints, travel, rock-and-roll, math, and science rule.
Online & links to other socials at https://theskinnyonbenny.com
Online & links to other socials at https://theskinnyonbenny.com
Pinned
Ben Schultz
@ben.theskinnyonbenny.com
· Apr 10
What did 50s parents think Little Richard meant by “Good golly Miss Molly, Sure like the bone”?
That she wanted to make a stock?
That she wanted to make a stock?
The gas pump stocked with receipt paper is a unicorn.
November 29, 2025 at 4:52 PM
The gas pump stocked with receipt paper is a unicorn.
If you’re stuck in a car coming back from Thanksgiving, the Egg Bowl is on channels 81 and 84 on Sat radio.
Of course if you’re reading this, you can probably just watch on your phone.
Of course if you’re reading this, you can probably just watch on your phone.
November 28, 2025 at 4:49 PM
If you’re stuck in a car coming back from Thanksgiving, the Egg Bowl is on channels 81 and 84 on Sat radio.
Of course if you’re reading this, you can probably just watch on your phone.
Of course if you’re reading this, you can probably just watch on your phone.
I do like when College Gameday starts in the dark.
November 22, 2025 at 2:02 PM
I do like when College Gameday starts in the dark.
Let me just fix that news alert for you right quick @nytimes.com
In an attempt to distract from the fact that the President raped children, The Trump administration announced an aggressive plan to continue dismantling the Education Department.
In an attempt to distract from the fact that the President raped children, The Trump administration announced an aggressive plan to continue dismantling the Education Department.
November 18, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Let me just fix that news alert for you right quick @nytimes.com
In an attempt to distract from the fact that the President raped children, The Trump administration announced an aggressive plan to continue dismantling the Education Department.
In an attempt to distract from the fact that the President raped children, The Trump administration announced an aggressive plan to continue dismantling the Education Department.
I would kill for a good crab cake sandwich today.
November 13, 2025 at 3:56 PM
I would kill for a good crab cake sandwich today.
What ever happened to Monie Love?
November 7, 2025 at 9:17 PM
What ever happened to Monie Love?
The cold open of It: Welcome to Derry scared the absolute shit out of me.
November 1, 2025 at 4:06 AM
The cold open of It: Welcome to Derry scared the absolute shit out of me.
When people choose the thumbs up emoji with real skin tone instead of yellow, it kind of freaks me out.
October 31, 2025 at 2:53 PM
When people choose the thumbs up emoji with real skin tone instead of yellow, it kind of freaks me out.
I can only think of one person who is going to be willing to take this job.
a man is talking into a microphone and saying `` i 'm comin ' '' .
ALT: a man is talking into a microphone and saying `` i 'm comin ' '' .
media.tenor.com
October 31, 2025 at 2:57 AM
I can only think of one person who is going to be willing to take this job.
Sunshine and Balance Beams by Pile on Apple Music
Album · 2025 · 9 Songs
music.apple.com
October 31, 2025 at 2:17 AM
Wow. I was so wrong about LSUs willingness to make a change now.
October 27, 2025 at 12:42 AM
Wow. I was so wrong about LSUs willingness to make a change now.
I want to eat leftover jambalaya that’s been sitting out all night and tastes faintly of the iron pot.
I want to eat leftover jambalaya but I’m not going to because it’ll make me sleep like shit, I’m not sure if we have any other food in the the house either, this is also Brian Kelly’s fault.
October 26, 2025 at 12:12 PM
I want to eat leftover jambalaya that’s been sitting out all night and tastes faintly of the iron pot.
Let it be known: all patches of bamboo are understood to also serve as a urinal.
October 23, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Let it be known: all patches of bamboo are understood to also serve as a urinal.
Texas offense right now.
Choking Cbs GIF by HULU - Find & Share on GIPHY
Discover & share this Choking Cbs GIF by HULU with everyone you know. GIPHY is how you search, share, discover, and create GIFs.
giphy.com
October 4, 2025 at 10:43 PM
Texas offense right now.
Todd Graves, cruising through the drive thru with a bunch of quarterbacks who kind of stink.
October 4, 2025 at 9:55 PM
Todd Graves, cruising through the drive thru with a bunch of quarterbacks who kind of stink.
If you’re going to schedule calls at 8:30, 9:30, and 10:00, you better believe my camera is going to “malfunction” while I have a poo.
September 30, 2025 at 1:27 PM
If you’re going to schedule calls at 8:30, 9:30, and 10:00, you better believe my camera is going to “malfunction” while I have a poo.
Talk about a guy who outkicked his coverage.
September 28, 2025 at 1:12 AM
Talk about a guy who outkicked his coverage.
I guess the new headgear pick is just Pat getting closer to naked?
September 27, 2025 at 5:10 PM
I guess the new headgear pick is just Pat getting closer to naked?
Houston ices thier own kicker.
September 27, 2025 at 6:23 AM
Houston ices thier own kicker.
I don’t know wtf I’m doing up at 1:12 am watching Houston at Oregon St, other than it’s going to overtime and I’m somehow invested.
September 27, 2025 at 6:13 AM
I don’t know wtf I’m doing up at 1:12 am watching Houston at Oregon St, other than it’s going to overtime and I’m somehow invested.
I tried to read Don Quixote once. People think it’s the story, but the windmill bit is right at the beginning. I don’t think anyone has ever finished that book.
September 25, 2025 at 1:34 AM
I tried to read Don Quixote once. People think it’s the story, but the windmill bit is right at the beginning. I don’t think anyone has ever finished that book.
It’s been like three weeks since Aldi has had the dill pickle hummus, and I’m getting bitter.
September 23, 2025 at 5:29 PM
It’s been like three weeks since Aldi has had the dill pickle hummus, and I’m getting bitter.
For people who don’t work in the office, I don’t even know how you start your day without watching old ladies eat oatmeal in the break room.
September 23, 2025 at 1:19 PM
For people who don’t work in the office, I don’t even know how you start your day without watching old ladies eat oatmeal in the break room.