Marc Blake (he/him) ((aka “M. David Blake”; see also: obscure))
@absinthefish.bsky.social
Science fiction writer, et cetera.
Dear Kellogg’s: I am one box-top shy of the number required for your peace prize, but have enclosed an additional 25¢ and S.A.S.E. so that I may still receive Tony the Tiger’s “You’re Grrrrreat!” award and endorsement.
December 7, 2025 at 6:25 AM
Dear Kellogg’s: I am one box-top shy of the number required for your peace prize, but have enclosed an additional 25¢ and S.A.S.E. so that I may still receive Tony the Tiger’s “You’re Grrrrreat!” award and endorsement.
In other news, Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil might award Citrine Caligula a Grammy.
December 7, 2025 at 2:57 AM
In other news, Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil might award Citrine Caligula a Grammy.
If you want to understand “spheres of influence,” just think of them like this: Putin’s puppet’s head is spherical, and it is influenced by Putin’s hand.
December 6, 2025 at 1:19 PM
If you want to understand “spheres of influence,” just think of them like this: Putin’s puppet’s head is spherical, and it is influenced by Putin’s hand.
At this rate, we’re only ~72 hours away from RFK committing war crimes, while Keg-breath peddles heroin-laced ivermectin on the street corner.
December 5, 2025 at 2:59 AM
At this rate, we’re only ~72 hours away from RFK committing war crimes, while Keg-breath peddles heroin-laced ivermectin on the street corner.
Roughly a quarter of a century from now, certain figures in the current administration will feature prominently in stage musicals and short stories involving time travel. #supereasypredictions
November 30, 2025 at 6:31 AM
Roughly a quarter of a century from now, certain figures in the current administration will feature prominently in stage musicals and short stories involving time travel. #supereasypredictions
Say what you will about him, he’s pardoned more turkeys than all other American presidents, combined.
November 27, 2025 at 6:30 PM
Say what you will about him, he’s pardoned more turkeys than all other American presidents, combined.
We need to end this sorry excuse for an administration now… because if we don’t, in another three years Hedgehog-sniffer will be trying to *draft* people in order to court-martial them.
November 25, 2025 at 10:12 PM
We need to end this sorry excuse for an administration now… because if we don’t, in another three years Hedgehog-sniffer will be trying to *draft* people in order to court-martial them.
MTG is leaving Congress in January… and the extent of my sympathy is to remind her about the screen door, because it’s on a strong enough spring to give a solid whack upon exiting.
November 22, 2025 at 3:36 AM
MTG is leaving Congress in January… and the extent of my sympathy is to remind her about the screen door, because it’s on a strong enough spring to give a solid whack upon exiting.
The Coast Guard now says, rather than being hate symbols, swastikas are merely “potentially divisive.”
I’m on the “fuck the Coast Guard” side of that divide.
I’m on the “fuck the Coast Guard” side of that divide.
November 20, 2025 at 11:12 PM
The Coast Guard now says, rather than being hate symbols, swastikas are merely “potentially divisive.”
I’m on the “fuck the Coast Guard” side of that divide.
I’m on the “fuck the Coast Guard” side of that divide.
It is signed. The fact that it was signed by someone convicted of sexual assault, himself heavily implicated in those same files notwithstanding, it is signed.
November 20, 2025 at 3:38 AM
It is signed. The fact that it was signed by someone convicted of sexual assault, himself heavily implicated in those same files notwithstanding, it is signed.
“If Democrats win, Trump will be impeached!” has got to be the most on-point “Get me the fuck to the polls!” messaging I’ve ever heard.
November 20, 2025 at 3:12 AM
“If Democrats win, Trump will be impeached!” has got to be the most on-point “Get me the fuck to the polls!” messaging I’ve ever heard.
It wouldn’t surprise me to learn he’s said “Quiet, Piggy!” to other people, in even more disturbing circumstances.
November 19, 2025 at 9:17 PM
It wouldn’t surprise me to learn he’s said “Quiet, Piggy!” to other people, in even more disturbing circumstances.
If you had catsup on your shopping list, I hope you bought some before the six o’clock news! Anticipating a shortage.
November 18, 2025 at 11:20 PM
If you had catsup on your shopping list, I hope you bought some before the six o’clock news! Anticipating a shortage.
So… by voting against their release, Clay Higgins (R-LA) has pretty much volunteered to be one of the first names searched, at whatever point the Epstein Files become available.
November 18, 2025 at 8:21 PM
So… by voting against their release, Clay Higgins (R-LA) has pretty much volunteered to be one of the first names searched, at whatever point the Epstein Files become available.
Given what’s certainly coming, and as a preemptive defense: I swear to God, I’m a writer!
Or something like that.
Or something like that.
November 15, 2025 at 3:37 AM
Given what’s certainly coming, and as a preemptive defense: I swear to God, I’m a writer!
Or something like that.
Or something like that.
Any bets on how long J.D. Vance can hold his breath? Because I kinda suspect he’s doing so, while waiting for the Oval Office desk chair to re-plump itself.
November 15, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Any bets on how long J.D. Vance can hold his breath? Because I kinda suspect he’s doing so, while waiting for the Oval Office desk chair to re-plump itself.
The necrotic toddler claims that the Epstein Files are a hoax, AND that any Democrats named in them should be investigated by the Justice Department.
This is roughly on par with claiming the food is horrible, and the portions are too small.
This is roughly on par with claiming the food is horrible, and the portions are too small.
November 14, 2025 at 11:22 PM
The necrotic toddler claims that the Epstein Files are a hoax, AND that any Democrats named in them should be investigated by the Justice Department.
This is roughly on par with claiming the food is horrible, and the portions are too small.
This is roughly on par with claiming the food is horrible, and the portions are too small.
“My fellow Americans, our long national nightmare is over. Our Constitution works; our great Republic is a government of laws and not of men.“ — from Gerald Ford's Inaugural Remarks, 9 August 1974, following Richard Nixon’s disgrace and resignation due to Watergate
November 12, 2025 at 3:49 PM
“My fellow Americans, our long national nightmare is over. Our Constitution works; our great Republic is a government of laws and not of men.“ — from Gerald Ford's Inaugural Remarks, 9 August 1974, following Richard Nixon’s disgrace and resignation due to Watergate
Kinda wild that the same folks who dismissed my suggestion this deal would force the House to get Adelita Grijalva sworn in are suddenly celebrating the fact that *checks notes* Adelita Grijalva is about to be sworn in.
November 11, 2025 at 11:09 PM
Kinda wild that the same folks who dismissed my suggestion this deal would force the House to get Adelita Grijalva sworn in are suddenly celebrating the fact that *checks notes* Adelita Grijalva is about to be sworn in.
One thing worth remembering is that *IF* any bill passes the Senate that differs *AT ALL* from what the House sent them, it effectively forces the House back into session (unless they choose to ignore it) and gets Adelita Grijalva sworn in.
November 10, 2025 at 2:34 AM
One thing worth remembering is that *IF* any bill passes the Senate that differs *AT ALL* from what the House sent them, it effectively forces the House back into session (unless they choose to ignore it) and gets Adelita Grijalva sworn in.
There are two ways to look at what’s going on with Senate Democrats. One is that they might cave. The other is that they might force the House back into session and get Adelita Grijalva sworn in.
November 10, 2025 at 1:11 AM
There are two ways to look at what’s going on with Senate Democrats. One is that they might cave. The other is that they might force the House back into session and get Adelita Grijalva sworn in.
Can’t lie: The fact that Zohran Mamdani will be the new mayor of NYC might be the only thing that could get me to voluntarily visit NYC. Like, ever.
November 9, 2025 at 5:34 AM
Can’t lie: The fact that Zohran Mamdani will be the new mayor of NYC might be the only thing that could get me to voluntarily visit NYC. Like, ever.
November 5, 2025 at 3:07 AM
My default assumption is that anyone the Golden Grifter endorses might also be in the Epstein Files.
November 4, 2025 at 9:03 PM
My default assumption is that anyone the Golden Grifter endorses might also be in the Epstein Files.
November 2, 2025 at 7:50 PM